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The People Celebrities Marry

I remember a time, well over 10 years ago, when I dated a woman who told me her last boyfriend was a guy that was currently playing power forward/center for the Phoenix Suns. It was a player I liked.

The subject had come up over dinner when we started talking about basketball (I'm such a great conversationalist with the ladies).

I had gone out with another woman on a blind date. My friends little sister thought we'd be perfect together, since we both loved The Doors (we had absolutely nothing else in common).

She ended up being a complete wacko. I won't go into all the reasons why. But, I was told by our friend that whatever I do, I shouldn't bring up Steve Poltz. She had been a big Rugburns fan and dated him briefly and it ended badly.

So, we're having dinner at the Hard Rock Cafe in La Jolla, and a song by Nerf Herder came on. It sounded a lot like Steve Poltz. She got this look on her face and said, "Who is singing this?" I told her it was Nerf Herder. She replied, "It sounds like Steve Poltz." And before I could even finish the sentence "I know, I thought the same thing when I first heard it," she was interrupting to say "I slept with him before."

There was a few seconds of silence, as I was wondering why my friend had told me not to bring his name up and she brought up something as inappropriate as that.

I simply said "You must be so proud."

I was thinking about those two "relationships" lately. That's because a few of the entertainment magazines have done stories about celebrities and the famous people that had previously dated.

One showed the woman Mel Gibson recently had his 9th child with. She apparently used to date former James Bond Timothy Dalton (who I think did one of the best Bond movies ever). They have a 12-year-old son together.

Bruce Willis had taken a page out of ex-wife Demi Moore's playbook and married someone much younger. She's 22-years-younger. And this model has a list of former famous folks she dated.

She was 21 when she dated a 47-year-old Italian businessman (who had dated Naomi Campbell and fathered a child with Heidi Klum; dude likes his models).

She dated Sean Combs (the artist formerly known as Puff Daddy, P Diddy; and should be known as P. Douchey).

She was engaged to Brent Bolthouse, a big name on the LA party scene. She dumped him for John Stamos (who was only 15 years her senior).

My questions is...why would Bruce Willis want to marry someone with a past like this?

Now, in the normal world, I don't think you should worry so much about the past love life of the person you're with. But in Hollywood, I don't think that applies. Even though Tom Arnold's marriage to a school teacher didn't work out (and he's already on to his 4th wife), at least he didn't marry someone that used to be with Tom Green (nice choice there, Drew Barrymore).

For example, John Travolta married Kelly Preston. A beautiful actress. But she was engaged to Charlie Sheen. Now, what happened to that statistic that said when you sleep with someone, you're sleeping with everyone they slept with? If a woman had anything to do with Charlie Sheen, wouldn't you stay away?

Is it really worth running into that celebrity at parties, movie screenings, or just going thru the channels and seeing a repeat of Two and a Half Men.

Remember, Charlie Sheen is the actor that dated a few different porn stars and admitted to being involved in the Heidi Fleiss scandal.

Locally, Padres broadcaster Ted Leitner has been known for his handful of marriages. He often joked about it on the air and in interviews.

I remember one of his wives used to date a player on the Chargers. And I thought that was odd. Can you imagine Leitner, when he was doing the sports on Channel 8, talking about the Chargers latest loss. And then saying "The reason they lost so bad, was the poor, horrible performance by [insert ex-boyfriend here]"

And don't these celebrities wonder, when they hook up with a woman that has dated a bunch of other famous men -- is she really into me, or is she a groupie?

I remember when Sandra Bullock married Jesse James, that biker dude covered in tattooes. It was her first marriage, and I believe his third. He had three kids, and I figured that was baggage she didn't need.

And now we're seeing just how much baggage can catch up with ya.

She's involved in this crazy custody battle with James' ex-wife, Janine Lindemulder, who has a local connection. She was in a couple of blink 182 videos, and on the cover of their "Enema of the State" CD (clever title, guys; although not as clever as your "Take off Your Coat and Jacket).

Oh, and she's also a porn star who has done over 100 films.

She was set to regain custody of her 5-year-old child, since she completed her sentence for tax evasion. She appeared on Good Morning America" and other shows, saying Bullock shouldn't be involved in this.

Lindemulder is now married to a convicted felon (who has some really cool tattooes on the top of his head...not that there's anything wrong with that). James and Bullock don't think that's the type of environment for their child. Yeah. A better environment would be his reality show where he does death defying stunts. I'm wondering why, since she was a porn star when James married her, did he not wonder before having kids, if all this was a good environment to raise a child.

Bullock has done interviews, stating that the child was left alone during the day while Lindemulder was "asleep from drug use."

I would love to grab Sandra Bullock and say "What were you thinking when you married this dude?"

As she's thinking about that, I'd add, "And what were you thinking, doing the Proposal, and the last 8 crappy movies you did? Did you even read the scripts?!"

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I remember a time, well over 10 years ago, when I dated a woman who told me her last boyfriend was a guy that was currently playing power forward/center for the Phoenix Suns. It was a player I liked.

The subject had come up over dinner when we started talking about basketball (I'm such a great conversationalist with the ladies).

I had gone out with another woman on a blind date. My friends little sister thought we'd be perfect together, since we both loved The Doors (we had absolutely nothing else in common).

She ended up being a complete wacko. I won't go into all the reasons why. But, I was told by our friend that whatever I do, I shouldn't bring up Steve Poltz. She had been a big Rugburns fan and dated him briefly and it ended badly.

So, we're having dinner at the Hard Rock Cafe in La Jolla, and a song by Nerf Herder came on. It sounded a lot like Steve Poltz. She got this look on her face and said, "Who is singing this?" I told her it was Nerf Herder. She replied, "It sounds like Steve Poltz." And before I could even finish the sentence "I know, I thought the same thing when I first heard it," she was interrupting to say "I slept with him before."

There was a few seconds of silence, as I was wondering why my friend had told me not to bring his name up and she brought up something as inappropriate as that.

I simply said "You must be so proud."

I was thinking about those two "relationships" lately. That's because a few of the entertainment magazines have done stories about celebrities and the famous people that had previously dated.

One showed the woman Mel Gibson recently had his 9th child with. She apparently used to date former James Bond Timothy Dalton (who I think did one of the best Bond movies ever). They have a 12-year-old son together.

Bruce Willis had taken a page out of ex-wife Demi Moore's playbook and married someone much younger. She's 22-years-younger. And this model has a list of former famous folks she dated.

She was 21 when she dated a 47-year-old Italian businessman (who had dated Naomi Campbell and fathered a child with Heidi Klum; dude likes his models).

She dated Sean Combs (the artist formerly known as Puff Daddy, P Diddy; and should be known as P. Douchey).

She was engaged to Brent Bolthouse, a big name on the LA party scene. She dumped him for John Stamos (who was only 15 years her senior).

My questions is...why would Bruce Willis want to marry someone with a past like this?

Now, in the normal world, I don't think you should worry so much about the past love life of the person you're with. But in Hollywood, I don't think that applies. Even though Tom Arnold's marriage to a school teacher didn't work out (and he's already on to his 4th wife), at least he didn't marry someone that used to be with Tom Green (nice choice there, Drew Barrymore).

For example, John Travolta married Kelly Preston. A beautiful actress. But she was engaged to Charlie Sheen. Now, what happened to that statistic that said when you sleep with someone, you're sleeping with everyone they slept with? If a woman had anything to do with Charlie Sheen, wouldn't you stay away?

Is it really worth running into that celebrity at parties, movie screenings, or just going thru the channels and seeing a repeat of Two and a Half Men.

Remember, Charlie Sheen is the actor that dated a few different porn stars and admitted to being involved in the Heidi Fleiss scandal.

Locally, Padres broadcaster Ted Leitner has been known for his handful of marriages. He often joked about it on the air and in interviews.

I remember one of his wives used to date a player on the Chargers. And I thought that was odd. Can you imagine Leitner, when he was doing the sports on Channel 8, talking about the Chargers latest loss. And then saying "The reason they lost so bad, was the poor, horrible performance by [insert ex-boyfriend here]"

And don't these celebrities wonder, when they hook up with a woman that has dated a bunch of other famous men -- is she really into me, or is she a groupie?

I remember when Sandra Bullock married Jesse James, that biker dude covered in tattooes. It was her first marriage, and I believe his third. He had three kids, and I figured that was baggage she didn't need.

And now we're seeing just how much baggage can catch up with ya.

She's involved in this crazy custody battle with James' ex-wife, Janine Lindemulder, who has a local connection. She was in a couple of blink 182 videos, and on the cover of their "Enema of the State" CD (clever title, guys; although not as clever as your "Take off Your Coat and Jacket).

Oh, and she's also a porn star who has done over 100 films.

She was set to regain custody of her 5-year-old child, since she completed her sentence for tax evasion. She appeared on Good Morning America" and other shows, saying Bullock shouldn't be involved in this.

Lindemulder is now married to a convicted felon (who has some really cool tattooes on the top of his head...not that there's anything wrong with that). James and Bullock don't think that's the type of environment for their child. Yeah. A better environment would be his reality show where he does death defying stunts. I'm wondering why, since she was a porn star when James married her, did he not wonder before having kids, if all this was a good environment to raise a child.

Bullock has done interviews, stating that the child was left alone during the day while Lindemulder was "asleep from drug use."

I would love to grab Sandra Bullock and say "What were you thinking when you married this dude?"

As she's thinking about that, I'd add, "And what were you thinking, doing the Proposal, and the last 8 crappy movies you did? Did you even read the scripts?!"

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