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Manners and Etiquette
You're the one with the time, anti, you find the cite. It'll be like the kids that have a blast doing those word searches. You can look for all the definitions of the word, and maybe learn something. Or find some future cites for finding my misspellings or incorrect meanings (I guarantee there will be more in the future). Good day.— July 14, 2009 4:08 p.m.
Two Adrenaline Junkie Deaths
hansl...I actually agree with you. I do believe that a rock climber isn't doing something as careless as a tourist running from the bulls. And now that you mention it, it does kind of suck for the family to possibly Google, and see this write-up. I apologize for it. When I read about his making wagers of $10,000 and things of that nature, it just rubbed me the wrong way. And it always seems to be these types of climbers that need to be rescued, on tax payer money. When Bachar died, I couldn't help wonder, if he had used a harnass (and perhaps may have lost some of the credit he got as this amazing, free rock climber that doesn't use gear), he would most certainly be alive today. And to quote a cliche..."If I can just change one rock climbers mind, than my dickery was worth it."— July 14, 2009 4:05 p.m.
Where to find humor in San Diego
A few other things I thought of. What was that strip club in town, I think it was around 15 years ago...they had a sign that said "100 of the hottest women, and two ugly ones." I always thought that was kind of funny, but had to imagine that the least attractive women working there, had to deal with the drunk patrons that said, "Oh...you must be the one they refered to on the sign." Anyway...I wanted to comment on the joke about the Santa not "believing in himself." I really, seriously doubt a 9-year-old thought of that. Unless Matt himself, had watched his son working on it for weeks, and coming up with that punch line. It's just way to advanced a concept for a kid to write. He could've very easily seen it somewhere, and just said it. You didn't know the source, and wanted to be the proud papa. I remember being 4, and hearing a 7-year-old kid tell someone that he wanted to be an "oceanographer" when he grew up. The adults were so impressed by this answer, that I stole it. For the next few years, any adult that would ask me, would hear that answer. They probably still talk about this genius 4-year-old that wanted to be an oceanographer, and they're wondering what seas I'm exploring. If they only knew it actually lead to a life of putting to use that plagirism I learned so early on. On the subject of jokes and writing...people with a quick wit are always fun to be around. The things that come out of their mouths. Since Mary Poppins and the "spoonfull of sugar" came up, I had a joke when Julie Andrews checked herself in for an addiction to pain killers. I said, upon hearing the news, "I don't think it was the pain medication she was addicted to, but the spoonfull of sugar." The people with me laughed. But I spent days trying to make it funnier. I thought about saying the spoonful of sugar made her addicted to sweets and cookies. Nope. That she tried snorting the sugar like it was coke. Nope. Sometimes the first thing out of your mouth, and the spontanious moment, makes it work best. And to end with one last observation on strip clubs (haven't been to one in many, many years. honest) The DJs always try to be funny, and never are. Especially when they throw a one-liner out, followed with how we should tip the women because they work so hard.— July 14, 2009 12:10 a.m.
Where to find humor in San Diego
I just finished reading the cover story. It was great, although...I can't help but wonder if Matthew had a conversation with his wife that went like: "No, you don't understand. I'm going there for the jokes. Seriously." I think the idea of the strip club having a sign that says something about the women with "...the best sense of humor," is a play on the fact that EVERY STUDY that comes out says that a "sense of humor" is the most important thing a person looks for in a partner. And everyone pretty much feels like that's a load of crap. Because if Roseanne Barr was working at a strip club, a lot less guys would be interested than the one that looked like Pamela Anderson. I used to play on that whole premise of surveys and what people like, if I met a woman and she started asking me what my interests were. It just seemed so much like the type of question you'd ask on a dating service, that I'd respond by saying "I can tell you what I don't like. I hate walks on the beach. Absolutely hate them." The woman would either smile at the sarcasm. Or get a weird look on their face and ask, "What could you hate about a walk on a beautiful beach?" At that point, I realize I'm probably with the wrong person, but depending on my mood, I might say "Well...the sand just gets in my shoes. The seaweed that washes up is disgusting. And if you aren't careful, a seagull craps on your head. And don't even get me started on the amount of sunscreen I need to use" At that point, they realize they're with the wrong person. Humor is such an interesting thing. For example the pirate joke told in the story, is soooo much funnier if you drio the word "d--k". Which is surprising, because "d**k" is a funny word (much like the word "p-nis" as discussed in the story) So the joke would go: A pirate walks into a bar, with a parrot on his shoulder and a steering wheel hanging out of his pants. The bartender asks what the deal is with the steering wheel. The pirate looks down and says "Rrrrrrr...it's drivin' me nuts." Now, the parrot isn't necessary. Just adds a little "color" to the visual. But by avoiding the "d--k" and saying "pants", it makes the "nuts" in the punchline that much funnier, as that's the ONLY blue word you're hearing. So you get that added shock value with the humor. I hate people that say "I can't remember any jokes." Because, you don't have to sit around memoraizing them. Just remember the five really funny ones. And you can always change the joke, it's the punchline that you need to remember. You can build the story around it (which was, sort of, the premise of the documentary The Aristocrats)— July 13, 2009 11:58 p.m.
LeBron James -- Bad Sport?
LEBRON BEING DUNKED ON UPDATE: I met this tall basketball player over the weekend, who was really interested in the Lebron story. And he knew a lot more of the details then I did. He said that it wasn't Lebron having an ego that confiscated the tapes from the people filming. It was the fact that the high school kid that dunked on him, was wearing Adidas. And that would look bad to the Nike people that are spending all that dough on King James.— July 13, 2009 10:37 p.m.
Where to find humor in San Diego
The classic knock knock joke I love is the one that goes: knock, knock. Who's there? The Interrupting Cow. The interrupting Cow, Who? (now, during that last line, you're supposed to interrupt with a "moo", before they finish and get to the "who?" part). People either already know this joke, or they inevitably mess it up. Sometimes they don't repeat "The interrupting cow, who?" Or...they just say "What? What does that mean? What's an interrupting cow?" Instead of them just following along the knock/knock rule of repeating, and adding the "who".— July 13, 2009 10:30 p.m.
BREAKING NEWS BLOG -- Michael Jackson and Farrah Die
rickey...pointing out things Spliff says like that are useless. i find it odd that he thinks gay marriage isn't something that should be discussed, because it doesn't have anything to do with him. yet if it is a race issue, he thinks America should correct those problems. yet, if gay people can't get married, have the same rights/benefits as other people, that should be a matter EVERY ONE has an opinion on. Yet he doesn't. Why? well...because it doesn't affect him in any way. What a great person that is to have walking around in society. One that ONLY cares about himself. This is EXACTLY why a person like Spliff, is probably the one that is talking in a movie theatre, or blaring his car stereo too loud at stop lights or at 2:30 a.m. in a residential neighborhood....because he's cruisin' thru life, doing what HE WANTS TO DO, and not worrying about how it might bother others. SPEAK ON IT, BROTHA!!!! (just not in a movie, when I'm trying to listen to the people on screen)— July 13, 2009 8:46 p.m.
BREAKING NEWS BLOG -- Michael Jackson and Farrah Die
Okay, well...I don't. Just thought I'd be sarcastic, to get Spliff all excited. I do eat lots of Cracker Jack, though. (And I still get excited by the little prize in each package)— July 13, 2009 8:42 p.m.
Give Us Our Music Back!
Why don't you post one of yours anti, on one of your online dating sites. It might help. Cheers.— July 13, 2009 8:40 p.m.
Manners and Etiquette
anti...what makes this all so perplexing, is the fact that you're on such a war path to "correct" anything I say in the blogs. it makes me wonder if you have nothing better to do with your time. i mean, really? (said in the amy/jimmy fallon voices you are so fond of) You read a blog, it flows nicely...it mentions dowry. You can't find anything else in the blog to knock spelling wise, so you think that's your best best. You go to Wikipedia and it seems to support you, so you cut and paste the link. Really? That was all worth it? on Monday night, when so many interesting things are on TV, so many great classic novels you can read, so many options in the world. But you choose going with Wikipedia, to try to catch me on an error. Really?— July 13, 2009 8:39 p.m.