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Give Us Our Music Back!

I blame another member of the Jackson family. Janet Jackson, and her Super Bowl half-time show. The one with the famous "wardrobe malfunction."

It makes me wonder if the Jackson family, which seems to have so many problems when it comes to wardrobes -- whether that means finding a second glove to wear, or keeping your shirt on and not exposing a breast -- I'm glad they were able to pull off the Michael funeral with no such snafus.

Anyway, ever since Janet pulled that little stunt with Justin (and scored a $550,000 fine from the FCC), radio stations have gotten tougher about the song lyrics you hear.

Up until that point, things had been slipping by. That could mean we'd see Dennis Franz in the shower on an episode of NYPD Blue (not that any one wanted to). Or we'd hear a Sublime song where he talked about a guy getting raped in jail.

Now, the entire Sublime catalog gets bleeped when on the airwaves.

I was driving to a party last night and heard The Beastie Boys "Sabotage." And it was the song lyrics that were sabotaged with an edit. I tried to go thru the words in my mind, wondering what could've been edited. He sings about crystal balls not being crystal clear. The chorus has him rhyme "mirage" with "sabotage."

I just Googled, and see that there's a line that goes: "I got this f--king thorn in my side." I had never noticed it before.

But as is the case with many Sublime songs, there's so much other music/noise/screaming, you can hardly hear the "offensive" lyrics. It would just go over a kids head.

I remember reading in Howard Sterns book, about him getting fined by the FCC for saying "I shouldn't have married a Jewish woman. The only thing they want to do with their mouths is eat Chinese food."

Now...why would the FCC need to fine him over that? If anyone understood the joke, they're probably old enough. If any kid asked their parents what this meant, they could be told something as simple as "That means the woman doesn't want to kiss her husband. She just eats food she likes."

Not to mention, if you had kids in the car and were listening to Howard Stern, you've probably got some idiotic views on how to properly raise a child.

Which is one of the reasons Stern would go off on the FCC all the time (to be honest, the rants got old quick...but he had a point).

The FCC had a rule that stated, you could say anything you want. The f-word, any four-letter words, as long as your audience doesn't mind. Once they complain, the FCC will then investigate.

When some Christian groups complained about Stern, they were told by the FCC to document the time and day, and to write specifically what it is they heard.

So, the groups would sit around listening to the show, just to document what things would "offend" them. Not quite what the FCC had in mind. Most people feel if you're offended by something, just stop listening. It seemed to be the other way around with Stern.

I remember being in radio one time in the early 90s, and our boss edited the Lou Reed classic "Walk on the Wild Side".

I was working an overnight shift, and about 6:20 a.m. played the edited version. A few people called to complain about how ridiculous it sounded.

I can just imagine, they're trying to sing along to the line: She never seems to lose her head/even when she's giving...

And that last sentence doesn't come on!

I asked my boss why we edited it. He said the FCC warned us, after a woman complained, saying her kids were in the car and heard that line and asked what it meant. I had trouble believing the story. I also told my boss we should just take the song off our playlist, instead of sounding like the ONLY radio station in San Diego playing an edited version of it.

(We found out a year later, that the woman that complained worked at a competing radio station).

When I was leaving the party last night, I heard The Charlie Daniels Bands "The Devil Went Down to Georgia." Of course it was the version with him telling the devil "I told you once, you son of a gun, I'm the best there's ever been!"

But I remember being a kid when that song came out and it was always 50/50 on which versions the radio stations would play.

And "son of a gun" doesn't bug as much, since it's a phrase.

Unlike TV recently showing "Snakes on a Plane," and instead of Samuel Jackson yell "I'm tired of these mother f--king snakes, on this mother f--king plane!" He yells, "I'm tired of these 'monkey flying' snakes, on this Monday to Friday plane!"

A few days ago I heard the Steve Miller Band on KGB, singing Jetliner. The line was "I don't want to get caught up in any of that, funky kicks goin' down in the city."

The version we all like better had "sh--" instead of "kicks". Whatever.

Some edits work better.

In the Red Hot Chili Peppers great "Suck My Kiss" (which surprisingly, isn't an edit in the title, but the actual song title)...they did the edits themselves. The first time you hear it, it sounds a bit crude and rough. But you get used to it.

It's weird though, that alternative stations have had to edit all the Sublime songs.

But classic rock stations still play all the AC/DC tunes, and those have as many innuendos as any band around.

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Making Love to Goats, Rachmaninoff, and Elgar

I blame another member of the Jackson family. Janet Jackson, and her Super Bowl half-time show. The one with the famous "wardrobe malfunction."

It makes me wonder if the Jackson family, which seems to have so many problems when it comes to wardrobes -- whether that means finding a second glove to wear, or keeping your shirt on and not exposing a breast -- I'm glad they were able to pull off the Michael funeral with no such snafus.

Anyway, ever since Janet pulled that little stunt with Justin (and scored a $550,000 fine from the FCC), radio stations have gotten tougher about the song lyrics you hear.

Up until that point, things had been slipping by. That could mean we'd see Dennis Franz in the shower on an episode of NYPD Blue (not that any one wanted to). Or we'd hear a Sublime song where he talked about a guy getting raped in jail.

Now, the entire Sublime catalog gets bleeped when on the airwaves.

I was driving to a party last night and heard The Beastie Boys "Sabotage." And it was the song lyrics that were sabotaged with an edit. I tried to go thru the words in my mind, wondering what could've been edited. He sings about crystal balls not being crystal clear. The chorus has him rhyme "mirage" with "sabotage."

I just Googled, and see that there's a line that goes: "I got this f--king thorn in my side." I had never noticed it before.

But as is the case with many Sublime songs, there's so much other music/noise/screaming, you can hardly hear the "offensive" lyrics. It would just go over a kids head.

I remember reading in Howard Sterns book, about him getting fined by the FCC for saying "I shouldn't have married a Jewish woman. The only thing they want to do with their mouths is eat Chinese food."

Now...why would the FCC need to fine him over that? If anyone understood the joke, they're probably old enough. If any kid asked their parents what this meant, they could be told something as simple as "That means the woman doesn't want to kiss her husband. She just eats food she likes."

Not to mention, if you had kids in the car and were listening to Howard Stern, you've probably got some idiotic views on how to properly raise a child.

Which is one of the reasons Stern would go off on the FCC all the time (to be honest, the rants got old quick...but he had a point).

The FCC had a rule that stated, you could say anything you want. The f-word, any four-letter words, as long as your audience doesn't mind. Once they complain, the FCC will then investigate.

When some Christian groups complained about Stern, they were told by the FCC to document the time and day, and to write specifically what it is they heard.

So, the groups would sit around listening to the show, just to document what things would "offend" them. Not quite what the FCC had in mind. Most people feel if you're offended by something, just stop listening. It seemed to be the other way around with Stern.

I remember being in radio one time in the early 90s, and our boss edited the Lou Reed classic "Walk on the Wild Side".

I was working an overnight shift, and about 6:20 a.m. played the edited version. A few people called to complain about how ridiculous it sounded.

I can just imagine, they're trying to sing along to the line: She never seems to lose her head/even when she's giving...

And that last sentence doesn't come on!

I asked my boss why we edited it. He said the FCC warned us, after a woman complained, saying her kids were in the car and heard that line and asked what it meant. I had trouble believing the story. I also told my boss we should just take the song off our playlist, instead of sounding like the ONLY radio station in San Diego playing an edited version of it.

(We found out a year later, that the woman that complained worked at a competing radio station).

When I was leaving the party last night, I heard The Charlie Daniels Bands "The Devil Went Down to Georgia." Of course it was the version with him telling the devil "I told you once, you son of a gun, I'm the best there's ever been!"

But I remember being a kid when that song came out and it was always 50/50 on which versions the radio stations would play.

And "son of a gun" doesn't bug as much, since it's a phrase.

Unlike TV recently showing "Snakes on a Plane," and instead of Samuel Jackson yell "I'm tired of these mother f--king snakes, on this mother f--king plane!" He yells, "I'm tired of these 'monkey flying' snakes, on this Monday to Friday plane!"

A few days ago I heard the Steve Miller Band on KGB, singing Jetliner. The line was "I don't want to get caught up in any of that, funky kicks goin' down in the city."

The version we all like better had "sh--" instead of "kicks". Whatever.

Some edits work better.

In the Red Hot Chili Peppers great "Suck My Kiss" (which surprisingly, isn't an edit in the title, but the actual song title)...they did the edits themselves. The first time you hear it, it sounds a bit crude and rough. But you get used to it.

It's weird though, that alternative stations have had to edit all the Sublime songs.

But classic rock stations still play all the AC/DC tunes, and those have as many innuendos as any band around.

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