Various Authors noon, Jan. 19
- Community Blog
- Daily Crasher
Manners and Etiquette
I had a discussion with someone this morning. They had heard AJs Playhouse (92.5 FM) talk about the movie Bruno (it was okay, but not as funny as I thought it would be).
They said there was a 5 and an 8-year-old in the theatre (and this is an R rated movie that could've been rated X).
I thought AJ and his co-host should've said something to the parents.
The person I was talking to said that accomplishes nothing. I think, at the very least, it makes the parents feel bad and maybe they'll learn. Although, the few times I've done that when children were in R rated movies, just gets angry stares. And I'm lucky a fight didn't start in the parking lot.
You can't complain to the theatres, they've heard it all before. And they don't care.
And with an email someone sent me, and something I saw in Dear Abby, I started thinking all about manners, and what is and isn't appropriate to say to people.
In Dear Abby the other day, a woman complained that her friend jumped on her, because he knows she has caller ID, but still answered the phone with a "Hello?" instead of a "Hi, Steve." He thought it was rude to not say his name.
First of all, I've told people this before. Never let anyone know you have caller ID. Because, once they know that, it's information that can be used against you. Maybe you're screening calls, and they know you're home (the could've seen your car right out front). You'd have no excuse.
I certainly don't think it's rude. But I never cared for someone answering the phone with a "Hey Josh." I'm used to it now, as every cell phone has the caller ID. But it still seems polite to answer with a simple "Hello?" and let the caller say "Hey Josh, it's Steve. We playin' racquetball today?"
If I was Abby, I would've asked what happens if you say "Hi Steve" and it's his wife using his phone to call you, and she has to say "Oh no, Sylvia, it's me, Sharon. I'm just using his phone." Instead, we can avoid all that by just answering our phones the way we have since Bell invented them -- by simply saing "Hello?"
Even if you told your friend Steve to call you right back in one minute. It can ring a minute later, and you should still say "hello?" in case that isn't him.
A friend of mine four days ago, sent a list of manners that you should no longer have to follow in todays society. I didn't agree with all of the list.
One of the things said that you don't have to send a thank-you note or card for every little thing, like borrowing a persons umbrella.
While that may be true, I think society is slipping away from having young people write thank you cards. In this day and age with email correspondence and cell phones, people think they can have little Johnny send a cute email. I think if grandma sends you that big, huge check for $10 in your birthday card, you can sit with little Johnny and teach them how to write a proper thank you card or note.
The list said you no longer have to ask for the brides hand in marriage. Well, I disagree. How hard is it to ask the father? It's a formality, really. Because if the two of you want to get married and the father says, "Over my dead body!" I seriously doubt that will stop you. It's the gesture. And you don't have to "ask" as much as "tell" the father what you're planning. It seems the nice thing to do. It makes the appearance that you're going thru the motions. That you're seeking his approval, etc.
It's like holding a door open for a woman. Yes, of course she's capable of getting the big, heavy door herself. But it's a polite and chivalrous thing to do.
One of the points mentioned that it is now acceptable to wear jeans places that it once wasn't, like restaurants. And while this may be true (and also, in San Diego, include shorts)...I still think it looks bad wearing a baseball cap to the table.
If it's a fast food joint, that's fine. And I guess if it's at Denny's or Applebee's, not the biggest deal.
But if the restaurant is even the least bit more upscale, the cap should be off your head. And nobody seems to realize this (for the folks that wear their hats during the National Anthem at Padre games, you have my permission to just knock them off their heads).
The last thing on the list involved unmarried couples that come to visit, and forcing them to sleep in different rooms. The list stated that this is an outdated practice.
And that may be. But when I went to visit friends that are Christian, in Salt Lake City, I had no problem with my girlfriend and I sleeping in separate rooms. I know what their belief is things. Not to mention the fact that they had a 13-year-old during one of these visits.
I actually think, the bigger picture should be...if you're traveling, it's up to YOU, as the person that is going to be the guest crashing at someones house, to be considerate of THEIR rules.
If you don't like how they run things in their house, or you think there might be a conflict -- whether that means you're allergic to their cat or they're vegans, or whatever -- you can stay at a hotel, and do what you like.