On March 7, California State Assemblyman Richard Bloom introduced the Orca Safety and Welfare Act. If passed, the bill would outlaw the use of orcas for "entertainment" or "performance purposes." Bloom told the press that …
March 13, 2014
Almost Factual News
SeaWorld announces shift from orcas to sharks
Leaked: SDPD "Touch Guide"
USHERING IN A NEW ERA OF GENDER JUSTICE, DOWNTOWN — New San Diego Chief of Police Shelley Zimmerman says that her first order of business is "obviously, the restoration of trust between the Department and …
March 6, 2014
Local biotech seeks solution for water shortage
NERVOUSLY LOOKING AWAY, BIOTECH VALLEY — "As usual, big, loud, and dumb gets all the headlines," says Dr. Pisco Scales at the Sorrento Valley biotech Nucelis, LLC. "They're spending a billion dollars on that Carlsbad …
March 6, 2014
Playboy praises pervy pol
In what is perhaps a first for the storied men's magazine, a man has graced the cover of Playboy: former Mayor of San Diego Bob Filner. "Even more than President Clinton," explained an unsigned editorial, …
March 4, 2014
City thanks Peggy Shannon for not suing
"Sometimes, justice is its own reward," said Turbo Attorney Gloria Allred at the City Ceremony honoring Peggy Shannon last week. "Other times, you get paid." The ceremony was held to honor Ms. Shannon's decision to …
March 4, 2014
UT-TV Hires Ron Burgundy for New Web Venture
THINKING WHAT COULD BE DONE AT SD ON THE QT WITH $5 MILLION — When word came down that UT-TV was closing its cable TV operations, U-T Chief Operator John Lynch-Mobbe "couldn't help thinking what …
February 25, 2014
Dumanis in Casual (Political) Encounter?
REALIZING JUST WHAT THOSE MOTOR CARS ARE SYMBOLIC OF, LA JOLLA — Marc Chase, co-owner of Symbolic Motor Cars in La Jolla and alleged middleman in the Jose Azano Matsura political donation scandal, has come …
February 24, 2014
UCSD = UC Seeking Diversity
TIRED OF THE SAME-OLD SAME-OLD, LA JOLLA — In 2012, UC San Diego hired Wisconsin-based law professor Linda Greene to fill the newly created position of Vice Chancellor for Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion. Now, after …
February 21, 2014
Lansdowne Lays Down…the Law
WISHING THOSE POSTERS HAD NOT ACTUALLY BEEN FOUND ON THE WALL IN THE SDPD'S SEX CRIMES UNIT, DOWNTOWN — "Being chief is a tough job," says San Diego Police Chief Bill Lansdowne. "It's hard to …
February 20, 2014
Leaked: Kevin Faulconer's Inauguration Poem
SHOUTING "BOO YA!" AT WIKILEAKS AND SNOWDEN, NOBLE EXPERIMENT — Ever since Mayor-elect Kevin Faulconer's Media Manager Cara Talkingpoint announced the appointment of San Diego poet laureate Wanmor Bonghit to write the verse to be …
February 20, 2014
Fundamental(ist) Flaw
WATCHING THE SKY FOR BRIMSTONE, SANTEE — "It's not complicated," says Second Baptist Church of Santee Pastor T. Rebel Swiftsword, explaining his opposition to the Light & Life Foundation's decision to keep its Creation Museum …
February 18, 2014