Entries
Reality Shows and Rocket Men (I think it's gonna be a long, long time)
I was thinking about reality show “stars” lately. Not just because my girlfriend and I were Jon and Kate for Halloween, and he continues to do interviews – either saying idiotic things or storming off when he doesn’t like the …
The "How to Get Out of a Traffic Ticket" Blog
Last month when I wrote about my experience in traffic court – in which I went exactly one month earlier than my court date – I received a nice gift certificate to attend a comedy traffic school for free. As …
Take Me Out to the Dentist
My friend Heather told a story about taking the extra candy her kid got trick-or-treating, and how some Halloween fairy visited her child in the night and left her a toy. I think it was My Favorite Pony or something. …
The President and Perverts on Halloween
I completely forgot to contact that hotel in Mission Valley. You know the one that has “Joy” spelled out with the lights on, in various rooms? I was going to suggest they write “Boo” for October. And with the stories …
Annoying Airline Passengers and Dead Celebs in Commercials
Southwest Airlines apologized the other day. No, not because their pilots were sleeping on the job and missing their destination. And not because they ran out of peanuts. They should apologize for the on-flight movie being The Proposal, and having …
Wee for a Wii -- Weeee! for attorneys
It’s funny. I have friends that are lawyers, and whenever I think about legal questions to ask them, I forget what they were the next time we meet up. Probably a good thing. If it’s something I remember, it probably …
Athletes Hot-Doggin' It
All over California, there's big news. The San Francisco Bay Bridge had a chunk fall off causing a closure. In LA, a shooting at a synagogue. A man opened fire and shot two people as they arrived to worship this …
6-Year-Old Evicted
I got home yesterday and turned on the TV. Inside Edition had a story about a 6-year-old girl they said was going to be evicted. Well, with a tease like that, I certainly couldn’t change the channel during a commercial. …
Stupid Cops -- The No Habla English Edition
Why do police officers surprise me by continuing to do such stupid stuff? Don’t get me wrong, I’m the biggest supporter of the police. I feel bad every time there’s a shooting, because most times, I agree with them. And …
Baby Einsteins, Dumb Pilots
I hadn’t planned on blogging about that airplane that left San Diego and was going to Minnesota, but flew to a completely different airport nowhere near its destination. Even with my friend being on a plane to Minnesota that same …
Drunks in Duluth (or The Cops Was After My Hot Rod La-Z-Boy)
I'm watching the nighttime football game, and during commercials, I'm flipping over to Cops on Tru TV. I know there's going to be a day when I do that, and actually see a former NFL player that makes an appearance. …
Craigslist Craziness -- The Costume Edition
I guess I should start this blog by saying....the number one reason people don't want to watch a David Letterman sex video is: He just coughs and laughs uncomfortably, before throwing pencils at the camera. And the next guest on …
A Naked Man. And David Letterman Sex Tape.
A friend of mine alerted me to a story in Springfield, Virginia. It involved a guy who was arrested and charged with indecent exposure. Do you wonder where he was? Perhaps in a park, wearing a trench coat. Maybe the …
The Dog Blog -- Dogfight Edition
I just got home after seeing Paranormal Activity. I hadn’t planned on seeing it, but I made the mistake of commenting on someones blog. They were saying how amazing it was. I mentioned a movie with a $15,000 budget that …
Thoughts on Facebook and ACORN
A few of my friends posted interesting things on their Facebook page. One was a list of something like 30 things that are annoying about internet technology. It had things like those words you have to type in for security …
Death
As I sat here this afternoon trying to decide what to blog, I thought about death. No, not mine. Even though I did just turn 40, and that should be a time you start thinking about it, I s'pose. But …
Music and Metallica Fans -- Dumb or Smart?
Someone I work with and occasionally exchange emails with about music, sent me this great story. He said it might have some blog material. And he was right. It was from a website called MLive.com and it had to do …
Crazy Costumes -- Target Targeted, Illegal Aliens Offended
Cheech Marin’s song “Born in East L.A.”, the parody of Springsteen’s hit, was in my head all weekend. It stemmed from seeing the story about the Target store in L.A. that had illegal alien costumes. Those had a mask of …
Judge Idiot -- Won't Let Interracial Couples Marry
A Louisiana justice of the peace refused to issue a marriage license to an interracial couple. Keith Bardwell is the name of this racist idiot. He said that it’s because of the plight the kids might have. Yeah. The parents …
Prince in Nigeria
Geez, that title makes it sound like a world wide concert tour by that artist formerly known as ...whatever he was formerly known as. But hey, I'm running late to go smoke a cigar with a buddy, and couldn't come …