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Honking at the Homeless

Yesterday morning I was running late, and of course Murphy's Law...I drove up to an accident. It probably happened an hour earlier. But the idiots in front of me all had to slow down at look at the mangled vehicle off to the side.

Now, I don't fault them for that. You glance over to see if a human head is rolling around, or how much the Nissan looks like an accordion. I understand that morbid interest; but do it while driving at the regular speed. Don't slow the rest of us down.

I then had a car at the drive-thru of my bank, that finished their transaction. But they sat there for another five minutes. I would've honked, but I couldn't be positive they were done with their business. It wasn't until they started up their car and drove off.

I know, some people would say to me, "Well, you got to count your money and make sure they didn't make any mistakes." Whatever. You people just slow me down so much, I can't believe I get anywhere in the day.

Then I pull up near the movie theatres in Mira Mesa, and I'm at a light. A homeless guy is holding a sign that is way too long to read. Obviously, the dude just wants money. But he has a whole story about fighting in Vietnam. I swear, he should write a book about the experience. From the few paragraphs I read, that he was able to fit on the cardboard, it sounded interesting.

I was less interested when the guy in the white car beside me decides to give him some money. He walks (slowly) in front of my car, takes the money, and the light turns green. The two cars in front of me go, but I can't, because there's a guy with a missing tooth and long, scraggly hair in front of my vehicle. He wasn't walking all that fast, so I honked my horn. I guess I was doing it out of all the frustration from the drivers previously.

Big mistake. He then stood there, raised his hands in the air, and yelled "What are you doing, man? Honking at me?"

When I finally got into that mall parking lot, my girlfriend called. I said, "I just honked at a homeless man."

She replied, "...and waved?"

That's the type of sweetie she is. She knows I can be a jerk more often than not, yet she envisioned me honking and waving to the passing homeless people begging for cash.

I met a few friends at Pat & Oscar's for lunch. Since one is a musician, I asked him if he heard about the keyboard player of Lyndyrd Skynyrd dying. He asked how, and I joked "A plane crash."

(the band lost a handful of members in a plane crash in the 70s).

The woman with us didn't get it, but made reference to another plane crash in Oceanside.

I said, "And...we all know what song will be played at his funeral, right?"

The same lady said, "Oh, yeah. It'll probably be Stairway to Heaven."

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Yesterday morning I was running late, and of course Murphy's Law...I drove up to an accident. It probably happened an hour earlier. But the idiots in front of me all had to slow down at look at the mangled vehicle off to the side.

Now, I don't fault them for that. You glance over to see if a human head is rolling around, or how much the Nissan looks like an accordion. I understand that morbid interest; but do it while driving at the regular speed. Don't slow the rest of us down.

I then had a car at the drive-thru of my bank, that finished their transaction. But they sat there for another five minutes. I would've honked, but I couldn't be positive they were done with their business. It wasn't until they started up their car and drove off.

I know, some people would say to me, "Well, you got to count your money and make sure they didn't make any mistakes." Whatever. You people just slow me down so much, I can't believe I get anywhere in the day.

Then I pull up near the movie theatres in Mira Mesa, and I'm at a light. A homeless guy is holding a sign that is way too long to read. Obviously, the dude just wants money. But he has a whole story about fighting in Vietnam. I swear, he should write a book about the experience. From the few paragraphs I read, that he was able to fit on the cardboard, it sounded interesting.

I was less interested when the guy in the white car beside me decides to give him some money. He walks (slowly) in front of my car, takes the money, and the light turns green. The two cars in front of me go, but I can't, because there's a guy with a missing tooth and long, scraggly hair in front of my vehicle. He wasn't walking all that fast, so I honked my horn. I guess I was doing it out of all the frustration from the drivers previously.

Big mistake. He then stood there, raised his hands in the air, and yelled "What are you doing, man? Honking at me?"

When I finally got into that mall parking lot, my girlfriend called. I said, "I just honked at a homeless man."

She replied, "...and waved?"

That's the type of sweetie she is. She knows I can be a jerk more often than not, yet she envisioned me honking and waving to the passing homeless people begging for cash.

I met a few friends at Pat & Oscar's for lunch. Since one is a musician, I asked him if he heard about the keyboard player of Lyndyrd Skynyrd dying. He asked how, and I joked "A plane crash."

(the band lost a handful of members in a plane crash in the 70s).

The woman with us didn't get it, but made reference to another plane crash in Oceanside.

I said, "And...we all know what song will be played at his funeral, right?"

The same lady said, "Oh, yeah. It'll probably be Stairway to Heaven."

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Comments
7

"That's the type of sweetie she is. She knows I can be a jerk more often than not, yet she envisioned me honking and waving to the passing homeless people begging for cash."

...with big yellow smiley decals all over your car, throwing dollar bills out the windows and yelling, "HAVE A NICE DAY!!!"

Oh yeah. I can see it now.

;)

Jan. 31, 2009

You know what else bugs? The people who leave the store, get in their cars, and as you are waiting for their spot, they bust out their phone and make a call, or fiddle with the mirror, or just don't leave. As an aside, I love the word "jerk". It sums up so many things. Very effective.

Jan. 31, 2009

I, too, love the word "jerk". I just wish it weren't used with my name in the same sentence so often!

I liked it used in that Warren Beatty movie, where Benning tells him to "jerk himself a soda", although I have to say, I didn't like the title of the Steve Martin movie being called "The Jerk," as I thought he was "slow", but hardly a "jerk".

But yeah, MsG...when someone is waiting for your spot, you pull out. I've been in cars with people where I alert them to that fact, and they say "I shouldn't have to speed out of here because someone wants my spot." And I'll tell them you don't have to peel out...but you also don't have to spend 5 minutes looking in your glove compartment or finding the pack of gum in your purse. It basically boils down to people ONLY thinking about themselves, because if it were reversed, they would want the other person to pull out of the spot sooner.

And anti...I would do that, passing out dollar bills to the homeless, telling them to have a nice day. But, I would say to them "Look...I'm going to give you this money, but I don't want you buying soup, or food or anything. Promise me, that you're going to buy a bottle of beer, or a cheap wine like Thunderbird. If you promise me you'll do that, I'll give you some money."

Jan. 31, 2009

"I shouldn't have to speed out of here because someone wants my spot."

Exactly. Your impatient, pushy little California arse can keep circling. I got stuff to do in here before I take off.

Tough dookie, Honky.

:)

Feb. 1, 2009

Two things: my girlfriend read my blog at work and she said "Are you insane? I wasn't serious when I asked if you waved to the homeless guy. I was trying to be funny." I totally spaced on catching that. I thought she was seriously asking me that as a question.

Second, anti...you're the type of person that makes my life hell. You're intelligent, yet something in your brain won't let you do the right thing.

The right thing to do, is to think about others. So, when you are walking to your car, you glance around. See if another car is waiting. If one is waiting for your spot, you get in your car. Quickly. You put your seat belt on, and you pull out. That's it! Now, I don't fault the woman strapping little Johnny into his seat, or putting groceries in the back. But some people (ie YOU!) feel insulted in a way, that a person has "the nerve" to sit and wait for my spot.

Feb. 2, 2009

Wow...at Pat & Oscar's in Mission Valley last night, the best homeless guy of all-time. I was sitting outside, and returning to my table. He asked the people next to us (that always seem to go there and play board games), if he could have the bread sticks that they weren't going to finish. They said yes, he took them, and immediately left. He didn't bother anyone at any of the other tables.

My girlfriend and I had a lot of left over food we were then going to give him, but he quickly walked away before we could. We drove around a bit looking for him, to offer him a few bucks.

Feb. 5, 2009

That happened to me the other day. Some guy begging at an island of an intersection. Person donating too stupid to give the money during the five minute red light, everyone else too stupid to go while he tippy-toed to get his dollar.

I would feel bad if San Diego did not already have food and shelter programs in place for which I pay.

Feb. 7, 2009

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