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So I'm sitting here in a Toyota showroom while my car is getting an oil change down below in Service, and I'm sifting through the morning movie blog news. Film Drunk has yet another story about Michael Douglas blaming his throat cancer on cunnilingus (or rather, HPV acquired through cunnilingus). Suddenly, a tap hits my shoulder.

"What are you doing?"

It's a young woman. I don't know if she's curious, or angry, or what. I do know that I suddenly feel slimy for reading Film Drunk in a public setting. Still, honesty is the best policy.

"I'm reading Film Drunk. It's a movie blog."

"Does it tell you all the good movies?"

"No, it's more industry news."

"Like what?"

"Well, right now, I'm reading a story about how the actor Michael Douglas says he got his cancer from cunnilingus."

She smiles. "They'll say anything to get out of it. I'm serious. They'll say anything."

  • Big Screen alerts


Javajoe25 June 4, 2013 @ 10:15 a.m.

That's only true for married guys. I read that Douglas was feeling a little weak in the wrist coming out of doing "Behind the Candelabra" and so he felt the need to make sure everyone knew he was still a macho, meat-eating (preferably pink), red-bloodied all American male. Personally, for the chance to go downtown with Catherine Z-Jones, I'd be willing to take my chances with the hapap-v.

Incidentally Matt, I found out Horton Plaza parking garage accepts validation from their UA Theater even if it isn't for $10. Attendant at garage said they have an agreement with the theater (so you do have to go to that one - no running up to the 5th Ave Regal) to accept a validated ticket and not require full $10 purchase. That's decent of them, no?


Matthew Lickona June 4, 2013 @ 12:49 p.m.

It is indeed, JavaJoe. Thanks for the tip!


tomjohnston June 4, 2013 @ 12:03 p.m.

"She smiles. "They'll say anything to get out of it. I'm serious. They'll say anything.""

Obviously, this young woman needs to meet a better class of men! Ones that aren't afraid of genital slurpees! LOL


Colonna June 5, 2013 @ 1:04 p.m.

"They'll say anything to get out of it. I'm serious. They'll say anything."

I'm submitting this to the Hallmark Card company in Kansas City, MO under your name Matt. Priceless.



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