Photo by Joe Klein

Emergency Animal Clinic. "Pet owners do get rather broody in those hours."

You want the night staff

Do all these people pass through in the night, millions of little desperate atoms on their way to conventions, underground bingo palaces, or whores' bedrooms? The only person who sees them in their entirety is the night auditor, who calmly works on the hotel’s accounts through the night. But he is not by nature a teller of stories. Hotels have a secrecy that is peculiar to them and is the source of their dingy charm.

By Lawrence Osborne, June 11, 1992 Read full article

I figured out how to change invoices. I thought I was real crafty.

Doug Allen

San Diego employees who steal

Once we were moving this very rich old lady out of her home in Rancho Santa Fe. She was an arrogant bitch, very eccentric. She had these porcelain figurines from China, these porcelain dogs. And she kept yelling at me to be careful with them. So I’m walking out of the house and, right in front of her, I accidentally “fumble” one of these dogs.

By Abe Opincar, Sept. 3, 1992 Read full article

Boetticher at El Cortijo Lusitano stables: "I bailed out and somersaulted out to the right, and he spun around and came down with both hooves on my chest."

Scott Lindgren

Bare knuckles

“Bullfighter and the Lady turned out well because it was authentic. When the motion picture industry says no one’s gonna know, that’s crap. But the 42 minutes John Ford cut out was the difference between a good picture and a great picture. J Gilbert Roland, who was a complete schmuck. the best way I could make him look good as a matador was to surround him with great matadors who bowed and scraped to him."

By Adam Parfrey, Sept. 17, 1992 Read full article

Husain Hazery: “Oh, those people who set up ‘going out of business’ signs all over the place."

Photo by Dave Allen

Slabs of Persia

“We succeed, like the Koreans, because of the indestructible family unit, which makes a certain kind of economic growth possible. Take the carpet shops. Without families they’d disappear. But carpet stores keep capital and growth within the Iranian community, so we’re in control of them. We take the family extremely seriously. We’re used to real suffering, not the kind of “suffering” you talk about here in the ghettos."

By Lawrence Osborne, April 1, 1993 Read full article

San Diego was “paradise,” and nowhere in the world could be better.

Carolyn Fisher

An English child in southern California

Of all Disney’s attempts to do highly unpleasant things to the human nervous system, the notorious Space Mountain has to be the most Hunnish. It is infamous, even among English schoolboys who have seen its horrible nightmares again and again on television. The contraption consists of a huge ice-cream cone mountain, white on the outside, containing within it a roller coaster plunged for the most part in total darkness.

By Lawrence Osborne, April 29, 1993 Read full article

Girard in La Jolla

Photo by Craig Carlson

The gonzo San Diego visitor

All the fuss about their remodeling Salk. Those that’re remodeling. “The second most beautiful building in America,” i.e., after Wright’s Fallingwater — well I dunno ’bout that, lots of weather-beat wood and stone that looks like concrete but ain’t even: actual stone. A very dressed - down architectural wonder. First time I been there and I look around, check the fog, check the famous murdered eucalyptuses. Poor eucs.

By Richard Meltzer, Sept. 2, 1993 Read full article