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Blog Satirist Says Paulson's Plan for Wall St. Bailout Resembles Nigerian Letter

The political blog Daily Kos today (Sept. 24) picks up a delicious piece of satire originally printed in another blog, boingboing. Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson's outrageous scheme for bailing out Wall St. from years of an addiction to gambling with borrowed money reminds the writer of a Nigerian scam letter. Here it is, in part, with all its bad grammar, misspellings, etc.: "Dear American: I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude. I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you. I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s This transaction is 100% safe. This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check...My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred. Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchidren to [email protected] Faithfully Minister of Treasury Paulson."

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The political blog Daily Kos today (Sept. 24) picks up a delicious piece of satire originally printed in another blog, boingboing. Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson's outrageous scheme for bailing out Wall St. from years of an addiction to gambling with borrowed money reminds the writer of a Nigerian scam letter. Here it is, in part, with all its bad grammar, misspellings, etc.: "Dear American: I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude. I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you. I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s This transaction is 100% safe. This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check...My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred. Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchidren to [email protected] Faithfully Minister of Treasury Paulson."

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Response to post #1: And remember, $700 billion is a lowball estimate. Think trillions. Best, Don Bauder

Sept. 24, 2008

Oh god, if only it really WAS just an internet scam....

The Daily show last night showed a series of clips of different cable news shows trying to explain just how big is $700 billion. They concluded with a woman pointing to a McDonald's and explaining that $700 billion was the amount it would take to supply 2,000 McDonald's hot apple pies to every single American. That somehow very bizarrely summed up both the magnitude of the problem and what is fundamentally wrong with America in the first place. It was also a hilarious segue into the introduction of the guest for the evening, President Clinton. Clinton said (paraphrasing): That plan may work, because after about 350 pies you forget all about the fact you don't have a house anymore.

Sept. 24, 2008

So Don - is it worth contacting Senators/Congressmen to protest this Republican giveaway plan to save their Wall Street cartel members - or just forget 'cause its a done deal? If contact is suggested WHO would be most receptive and likely try to stop this Trillion $$$ giveaway? Thanks, Best

Sept. 24, 2008

The bailout is npt goign to happen.

These clowns running the country cried wolf one time too many.

Fool me once-shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

Sept. 24, 2008

Once again, Warren Buffett showed us with his Goldman Sachs deal the terms that taxpayers must demand.

The taxpayers must be issued Preferred stock certificates from Wall/Main Street and receive 10% interest.

This way we can fund social security, medicare, healthcare, education etc. and to hell with McPain's privatization of social security plan, the White House bailout demands are the worst case scenario from hell.

Sept. 24, 2008

Response to post #3: It is not too late to contact your representative (email, e.g.) and senators and tell them that if they vote for this plan -- unless it is severely amended -- you will actively work for their opponents in the next election. Tell them that you know how the Wall St.-Washington money game is played: the lobbyist money flows to the pols, who then pocket the loot and send taxpayer money to Wall St. That is as much of a scam as the $700 billion proposal. Best, Don Bauder

Sept. 24, 2008

Response to post #4: Once again, I hope you are right, Johnny, but I am a pessimist on this one. Best, Don Bauder

Sept. 24, 2008

Response to post #5: In effect, we would be charging 10 percent interest to Wall St. Not a bad idea, but the preferable thing, still, is that this does not get passed. Best, Don Bauder

Sept. 24, 2008

Response to post #8:

Trouble is that both McPain and Obama are going along with it because they are too busy to do anything about fixing the real world at the moment.

B&B 2008!

THE SAVE AMERICA NOW TEAM

Sept. 24, 2008

Response to post #9: I think it is hilarious that McCain, who a few months ago said that economics was not his long suit, now is suspending his campaign so he can go to Washington and help straighten things out. Best, Don Bauder

Sept. 24, 2008

Heard Bush say "Our Economy is Fundamentally Sound" lately?" What a BS speech tonight, hopefully his transparent plea to support this trillion $$$$$ giveaway will be met with scorn similar to his lie about the strength of the US economy. My take: ignore the scare tactics, let those individuals and entities which got themselves into financial trouble work their way out of it or fail - in the long run the integrity of the real free market non-govermentally-owned economy is more important than the Bush-touted "pain" that individuals and companies will "suffer" with less $$$$$ available to borrow and live beyond their means.

Sept. 24, 2008

Response to post #11: I suspect that this is all about our foreign creditors threatening to dump our paper and drive down the dollar even more unless we act to make them whole. Foreign countries not only hold 50 percent of our Treasury debt, they also hold CDSs, CDOs, AIG derivatives, other kinds of derivatives, Fannie and Freddie fixed income paper, you name it. I suspect that they are threatening to jettison our paper. I haven't heard economists comment on this. Of course, I might be wrong. Best, Don Bauder

Sept. 24, 2008
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