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Burger and Fries with Extra Lettuce (drive thru with guns)
A week ago, I heard about a cop in Denver named Derrick Curtis Saunders, who pulled a gun on the drive-thru employee of McDonald's.
Now, my first response to the cop would've been "Are you hear for the Hamburglar?"
No, he was there for his breakfast and just thought things were taking a bit too long. Hey...we can all understand the frustration. So often the "fast" in "fast food" doesn't seem to apply.
It might've made more sense if he pulled the gun the way Michael Douglas did in Falling Down, because he missed the time they stop serving breakfast by five minutes. Although, having worked there all thru high school, I can tell you...switching the grills from breakfast to lunch is so hard, you need to have a cut-off point.
We always did a seven minute window, or anyone that was in line when the switch happened at 10:30 a.m.
Tonight on CNN, I heard a story involving guns and drive-thru, this time in Dallas.
A man has robbed 10 different fast food places. A few he didn't succeed in getting any cash. And I immediately thought about how his success rate should be zero.
Imagine a guy pulling a gun in drive-thru. I'd shut the window and duck. I mean, that might be tough luck for the person bringing the bag of food to the window, but at least I'd be in the clear.
I don't think the "fast food bandit" is the same person that shot himself in the leg at a Taco Bell last week.
Why are so many people packing heat at food joints?
Remember Robert Blake? His wife was shot in the parking lot of an Italian restaurant, while he went to get the gun he left IN the restaurant. I'm surprised a valet didn't pull out an Uzi and stop the crime in progress.
With the Taco Bell patron...probably the first time something went thru their body quicker than those 99 cent burritos. But I digest.
As of now, the fast food bandit is still on the loose. So be careful honking in line at that soccer mom that's ordering 18 happy meals for her kids. She might turn around with a Glock.
And to any fast food employee that might be reading this...I have a way you can catch them.
When he pulls the gun out and asks for a bag of cash, do what you always to do me. Smile and say, "If you could pull forward, we'll get your order together and bring it out to you."
More like this:
- Bob on the Throne, meet Jack in the Box — July 11, 2013
- Fast Food Wrappers vs Gangsta Rappers — March 5, 2009
- Gun Control — March 27, 2008
- A Cheeseburger, Coke, fries, and $50 on the Giants — Jan. 30, 2008
- What's the deal with fast-food combos and pricing? — Jan. 25, 2001