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- Daily Crasher
I finished a few games of racquetball last night with one of the guys I play regularly with. We're in the sauna and he tells me that someone killed themself with a chainsaw. He said "Apparently, you can decapitate yourself with one of those things."
I had never doubted you couldn't.
You can always count on guys you play sports with, to keep you up to date on the weird ways people have died. I'm not sure why that is, but the amount of stories I've heard on the basketball courts....
An hour later I'm in the movie theater watching Cadillac Records (note to the black people that sat behind me: the characters in the movie can't hear when you yell stuff out at them; and the people in front of you don't want to hear it). Muddy Waters and Little Walter keep talking about "headhunters". Apparently when they'd go into a club, they were so good on their instruments, it's the nickname other bands called them.
I got home and turn on CNN. And, I see another "headhunter." Some Middle-Eastern reporter throwing his shoe at President Bush.
That might make sense if it was a shoe bomb, but what is that going to do? I mean, did the shoe smell that bad? It did make me think...Tom Jones has women always throrwing their underwear at him. Let's start a tradition of throwing shoes at Bush everywhere he goes. It'll be fun. Flip-flops from the crowds here in the west. Boots for those from his homestate of Texas....
I wondered, where was the secret service agent? In movies, it's always a Kevin Costner or Clint Eastwood, that dives thru the air and takes the bullet in the arm, in order to save the Prez. Yet, I didn't see a Secret Service agent in sight. And really, how hard is it to intercept a shoe? They aren't thrown like a football spiral. They spin around awkwardly and slowly.
A woman I knew years ago, had an uncle that was a retired police officer. He was hired as Arnold Schwarzeneggers bodyguard (I know...weird to think of him needing one). She was excited once, as she showed me the cover of the Union-Tribune. Her uncle was next to Arnold, picking an egg off his shoulder, that someone threw at him.
I joked with her for weeks after that. I asked how much her uncle got paid to remove eggs from Arnold. I asked if Arnold ate raw eggs the way Stallone did in Rocky.
I think my favorite joke involved whether or not her uncle was hurt from any egg shell shrapnel.
She tired of the jokes quickly.