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- Daily Crasher
The Name Game
People that have normal names, with weird spellings.
I sent an email to my moms cousin Karyn. She was surprised I spelled her name correctly. It then reminded me of a party I wrote about years ago. The woman was dating a guy from MTVs Jackass. And, when I wrote about “Karen’s” party, she was livid. She said, “I was going to save this article. But, nobody will believe you were talking about me.”
Her name was spelled Caryne.
I say, if your parents named you something like that, give your dad a swift kick to the groin. He deserves it. Either that, or get used to incorrect spellings and mispronunciations. I’ve been called Borg. I’ve been spelled Bord, Bored, and won’t even get into the “is your brother named Surf?” type of jokes I endured thru school.
Remember how Steve Martin looked at Sarah Jessica Parker in L.A. Story, when she said her name was Sandy, but it was spelled with a lower-case S, capital “n” and three e’s at the end of it?
I remember hearing a troop leader, when my brother was in cub scouts, say “seen” for the name Sean. I remember a P.E. teacher in 9th grade calling a girl named “Lemieux,” by pronouncing the “x” in that French name. Okay, those adults were idiots.
But, if your name is Michael, and your mom spelled it “Mykoal,” well, your family’s fault, not society.
I remember as a teenager, reading a story about that short basketball player Spud Webb. His mom was asked if she was a potato lover. She didn’t understand the question at first. She then said, “Oh no, I named him after that satellite, spudnick.” It didn’t say whether the reporter told her the Russian satellite was Sputnik.
And we wonder why these shows like “Are you Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” work.
More like this:
- Car Radio Control — Jan. 7, 2010
- Punk Politesse — July 1, 2009
- Hurricane P — Dec. 17, 2008
- Lost (and Found) in Translation — Jan. 20, 2005
- Evil sometimes strikes like Imperial Valley heat lightning in the night — July 30, 1992