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I sent an email to my moms cousin Karyn. She was surprised I spelled her name correctly. It then reminded me of a party I wrote about years ago. The woman was dating a guy from MTVs Jackass. And, when I wrote about “Karen’s” party, she was livid. She said, “I was going to save this article. But, nobody will believe you were talking about me.”

Her name was spelled Caryne.

I say, if your parents named you something like that, give your dad a swift kick to the groin. He deserves it. Either that, or get used to incorrect spellings and mispronunciations. I’ve been called Borg. I’ve been spelled Bord, Bored, and won’t even get into the “is your brother named Surf?” type of jokes I endured thru school.

Remember how Steve Martin looked at Sarah Jessica Parker in L.A. Story, when she said her name was Sandy, but it was spelled with a lower-case S, capital “n” and three e’s at the end of it?

I remember hearing a troop leader, when my brother was in cub scouts, say “seen” for the name Sean. I remember a P.E. teacher in 9th grade calling a girl named “Lemieux,” by pronouncing the “x” in that French name. Okay, those adults were idiots.

But, if your name is Michael, and your mom spelled it “Mykoal,” well, your family’s fault, not society.

I remember as a teenager, reading a story about that short basketball player Spud Webb. His mom was asked if she was a potato lover. She didn’t understand the question at first. She then said, “Oh no, I named him after that satellite, spudnick.” It didn’t say whether the reporter told her the Russian satellite was Sputnik.

And we wonder why these shows like “Are you Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” work.

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4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
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