A few not-so-shocking giveaways about this week’s new movie releases, including Justice League and Frank Serpico
Matthew Lickona 6 p.m., Nov. 17
When she wasn't busy being fabulous and enchanting, she liked to write.
When her attorney fees got too steep, she took some modeling jobs to pay the bills.
The Princess hated being a model. She had to work way too hard to stay that skinny, but being the creative genius that she was, she made the most of it.
She was half of a very hot celebrity couple for a while, as her entourage and the world looked on.
And through it all, there was one particular member of that entourage who loved the Princess more than anyone else, and longed for the day they would be together.
His name was Green. (We think this is his last name. But we don't know for sure. We only know that for some reason, it isn't easy, being Green.)
Green would use this opportunity to chat up the Princess as much as his limited skills would allow, and soon, they were a happy item.
Green was content to listen to the Princess, because she had many interesting things to say.
They also had much hot sex, which we'd prefer not to visualize (although we do understand there are pictures). Frankly, they were a bit kinky, which resulted in more than one trip to the ER.
(We're not sure how some of these accidents happened, but we have a pretty good idea).
Time wore on, and the two stopped those shenanigans and began to grow old.
Until one day, being a bit bored, the Princess went to a fabulous place in the Kingdom called a "spa." There, she got a few dozen things nipped, tucked and lifted, and went back to modeling and writing.
But he could never stay mad at the Princess for long, no matter what she did, so he soon got over it.
And, to this day, Green and the Princess reside happily ever after, in the City by the Sea.