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What I shoulda done during Comic-Con

Talk about having gone there at some point in the quasi-recent past, but now being super over it

Never disparage the cosplayers — they like the attention elicited by their “sweet” Lady Deadpool costumes.
Never disparage the cosplayers — they like the attention elicited by their “sweet” Lady Deadpool costumes.

DJ: So, exactly what does a hipster do during Comic-Con? — Sam King, San Diego

Oh, man. What doesn’t a hipster do during Comic-Con?

Avoiding downtown like the plague is always a good start. Nothing comforts a hipster quite so much as hunkering down over a craft beer with friends, preferably somewhere Uptown, far from the hullaballoo of the convention center, and commiserating over the preponderance of non-local yahoos mucking the place up.

Step two is talking about having gone to Comic-Con at some point in the quasi-recent past, but now being super over it because reasons.

Of course, a hipster might simply, I don’t know, attend the festival, mayhaps. He might have fun.

There is one low to which a hipster will not stoop. A hipster shall never disparage the cosplayers by pointing out, however saliently, that they are all a bunch of thirsty fake-ass poser pseudo-fans who don’t give a crap about comics the other 51 weeks out of the year — they just like the attention elicited by their “sweet” Lady Deadpool costumes, but they don’t really count.

No, a hipster shall not stoop so low, because that’s some straight-up bitter fanboy shit.

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Never disparage the cosplayers — they like the attention elicited by their “sweet” Lady Deadpool costumes.
Never disparage the cosplayers — they like the attention elicited by their “sweet” Lady Deadpool costumes.

DJ: So, exactly what does a hipster do during Comic-Con? — Sam King, San Diego

Oh, man. What doesn’t a hipster do during Comic-Con?

Avoiding downtown like the plague is always a good start. Nothing comforts a hipster quite so much as hunkering down over a craft beer with friends, preferably somewhere Uptown, far from the hullaballoo of the convention center, and commiserating over the preponderance of non-local yahoos mucking the place up.

Step two is talking about having gone to Comic-Con at some point in the quasi-recent past, but now being super over it because reasons.

Of course, a hipster might simply, I don’t know, attend the festival, mayhaps. He might have fun.

There is one low to which a hipster will not stoop. A hipster shall never disparage the cosplayers by pointing out, however saliently, that they are all a bunch of thirsty fake-ass poser pseudo-fans who don’t give a crap about comics the other 51 weeks out of the year — they just like the attention elicited by their “sweet” Lady Deadpool costumes, but they don’t really count.

No, a hipster shall not stoop so low, because that’s some straight-up bitter fanboy shit.

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