Still taken from Trump’s Baja Resort promo video, which began to include the haunting, regretful visage of the great developer only after the project failed, a development that has baffled paranormal researchers and mystic spiritualists alike. “If anything,” says Trump of the ghostly image, “it shows how much I care about quality.”
Recently, KPBS.org ran a story documenting the complaints of investors in a never-built Baja resort that bore the Trump name and seal of approval. Besides being bitter over the way the deal went south, these investors are warning that, should Trump be elected President in November, the rest of America will suffer similar disappointments, financial and otherwise.
“I trusted Trump,” admits area sucker Susan Gullible. “But at least my shame can serve as a warning to others. The man talks a good game, but in the end, he just likes playing around with other people’s money. That’s bad enough when you’re a developer, but it’s a lot worse when you’re President.”
Trump, however, took time out from his campaign to dismiss concerns and rebut criticisms. "It’s like I said in the resort’s promotional video: ‘People ask me, what does “Trump" stand for, more than anything else, and if I use one word, it’s always “quality.”’ I wanted to deliver the kind of ultra-quality resort experience that you would expect from a Trump property. Big windows, great fixtures, beautiful kitchens. And a hot location. But when I said ‘hot,’ I mean hot like Cabo, not hot like a Colombian drug war.
"Two things prevented me from building Trump Ocean Resort in Baja. First, top-quality construction means top-quality construction workers, and frankly, when my men went to Mexico, they were nowhere to be found. Because they had all come over the border, most of them illegally. Second, because the Mexican drug cartels brought violence and instability to a region that I was ready to transform into a playground for the rich that would have injected millions of legitimate dollars into the Mexican economy. Suddenly, it was like Cuba at the end of Godfather II down there. Investors who feel cheated because they lost their deposits on condos that were never built need to realize where the blame really lies: with America’s broken immigration policy and with America’s losing battle against its drug-pushing, family-killing neighbor to the south. I’m Donald Trump, and I have a legacy of quality to protect. And right now, that means keeping my operation north of the border. And maybe building a big old wall to help all those good Mexican workers stay put."