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So, everyone likes different kinds of music, clothing, TV shows, beer, food, jobs, cars, etc. My question is: if everyone likes all sorts of different things in life, why does everyone love pizza? At least, everyone I know does....

— Jacob

Pizza has so much going for it! For starters, it’s poisonously salty and greasy. That may not be good for our hearts, but try telling that to our brains. Through a combination of natural impulse and cultural conditioning, foods high in salt and fat (sugar, too) might as well be smothered in purest awesome sauce, sprinkled with fairy dust, and served by tail-coated unicorn butlers at a five-star restaurant built of rainbows. Our brains and tastebuds just love that stuff.

Pizza’s other big advantage is that small children often receive it as a reward, or a special meal, at least. “Hey, kids, who wants to go out for pizza?!” is one of the most cherished phrases a parent can utter. Being easily brainwashed, little pizza-munching grommets immediately decide that pizza = treats. Even into adulthood, pizza becomes a treat that you get yourself when you’re feeling low and wish to be cheered, or it’s what you eat when you’re having a party, or maybe if you’re out on an epic night with friends you go for after-hours pizza. It’s a food that’s always eaten with good cheer, as opposed to, say, broccoli. Not that there’s anything wrong with broccoli. It’s a perfectly respectable Brassica, loaded with vitamins and minerals, just not the life of the party.

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Jay Allen Sanford Jan. 30, 2013 @ 1:06 p.m.

Now a broccoli pizza, THAT's a party, at least at our place...


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