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Oh, Jane

Jane and her girls
Jane and her girls

Apparently, one of the other mothers at "drop off" -- where Jane drops her daughter Bella off at school -- was shocked by my sister's two-toned hair. As Jane relays it, her friend said something along the lines of, "Jane, what the Hell happened to your head?"

"It was dark in my bathroom, it looked fine," Jane told me as she explained how she was trying to conceal her "sparklers" (my term for little gray hairs that sprout around the hairline). "But when I was outside, Joanna told me that it was like four shades lighter than my hair."

"It's not just that," I said. It's lighter and weird looking. Like it's not even hair, but there's some kind of mud mask on it that dried. See, the rest of your hair is shiny, but this is just..." I ran a finger along the affected area. "This is just kinda gross. And I can still see some gray hair. Is that the same spray color stuff you used to spray paint your cat's ass?"

"No," Jane said. This is nice, this is Bumble & Bumble. I used some Hair Club for Men stuff on the cat, thank you." Jane's grimace told me she was dismayed at yet another reminder that she will never live that incident down. That we will forever tease her about the time she used color spray to fill in bald patches in her cat's fur so that the woman coming over to adopt the kitty wouldn't realize what a neurotic mess it was. Jane had also baked cookies that day, to make her house smell homey, and she had given the stressed-out feline a double dose of kitty Prozac so that it would seem extra mellow.

"Well, this isn't as funny as the cat, but thanks for the giggle," I said.

"Jacko," Jane said.

"Seriously though," I said, my face beginning to ache from the unusually broad grin. "Go wash that shit out, it's starting to give me the creeps."

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Jane and her girls
Jane and her girls

Apparently, one of the other mothers at "drop off" -- where Jane drops her daughter Bella off at school -- was shocked by my sister's two-toned hair. As Jane relays it, her friend said something along the lines of, "Jane, what the Hell happened to your head?"

"It was dark in my bathroom, it looked fine," Jane told me as she explained how she was trying to conceal her "sparklers" (my term for little gray hairs that sprout around the hairline). "But when I was outside, Joanna told me that it was like four shades lighter than my hair."

"It's not just that," I said. It's lighter and weird looking. Like it's not even hair, but there's some kind of mud mask on it that dried. See, the rest of your hair is shiny, but this is just..." I ran a finger along the affected area. "This is just kinda gross. And I can still see some gray hair. Is that the same spray color stuff you used to spray paint your cat's ass?"

"No," Jane said. This is nice, this is Bumble & Bumble. I used some Hair Club for Men stuff on the cat, thank you." Jane's grimace told me she was dismayed at yet another reminder that she will never live that incident down. That we will forever tease her about the time she used color spray to fill in bald patches in her cat's fur so that the woman coming over to adopt the kitty wouldn't realize what a neurotic mess it was. Jane had also baked cookies that day, to make her house smell homey, and she had given the stressed-out feline a double dose of kitty Prozac so that it would seem extra mellow.

"Well, this isn't as funny as the cat, but thanks for the giggle," I said.

"Jacko," Jane said.

"Seriously though," I said, my face beginning to ache from the unusually broad grin. "Go wash that shit out, it's starting to give me the creeps."

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Comments
1

u r such a funny gal

kudos!!

May 25, 2011

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4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
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