4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

The Colts' Luck

Young Mr. Luck missed the Heisman again this year, but he’ll still go number 1 or 2 in this year’s NFL draft.
Young Mr. Luck missed the Heisman again this year, but he’ll still go number 1 or 2 in this year’s NFL draft.

Six weeks ago I wrote a column about the Indianapolis Colts deliberately losing their games in order to guarantee owning the number 1 pick in April’s NFL draft. Said pick to be used to acquire Stanford’s once-in-a-generation quarterback Andrew Luck.

Things were strange six weeks ago, and that’s not counting Peyton Manning’s absence. I wrote, “But, it’s hard to believe the loss of one man, even a four-time MVP, causes a team that has made it to the playoffs every year for the past nine years in a row, a team that has been to the Super Bowl twice in the past five years...hard to believe the loss of that one man means that same team goes 0-8...”

The Colts were 0-8 then, now they’re 0-13, and it’s obvious they’re tanking. To replace Manning, the Colts ignored their backup quarterback, Curtis Painter (who was good enough to be on their roster for the past three seasons), and selected a retired 16-year veteran, Kerry Collins. Mr. Collins lasted three games. Then, Curtis Painter was dusted off and dubbed starter. As insurance, the Colts wisely signed not-a-household-name Dan Orlovsky, previously a second- and/or third-string quarterback for Detroit and Houston. Orlovsky was in between jobs.

This was going on while David Garrad, Carson Palmer, and Brett Favre were available. Any one of those quarterbacks will win games.

Sponsored
Sponsored

After Sunday’s 24-10 loss to Baltimore, in which, after three quarters, the Colts gained 53 yards in total offense, scored their lone touchdown on the final play of the game, head coach Jim Caldwell, using his deer-caught-in-headlights persona, said, “We just have to find a way to get our team better so we can get a victory.”

There are some positives coming out of that contest. Caldwell still has a job. Dan Orlovsky is quarterback. Detroit is the only team in NFL history to go 0-16, which was accomplished in 2008. Now, not only can Indianapolis match that low, but Orlovsky is just three losses away from being the only quarterback in NFL history to lead two, count ’em, two 0-16 teams.

Of course, if you play as badly as Indianapolis has, heads will roll. Larry Coyer, the defensive coordinator, was fired and replaced with Mike Murphy, 67, who, somehow, had been overlooked during his previous 14 years with the Colts. Defensive coordinator Murphy will continue his duties as linebackers coach. There’s a cost savings right off the top. Head coach Coyer said the change was made “to improve communication and production.” To complete this massive overhaul, Painter was demoted and backup QB Dan Orlovsky was named starting quarterback.

The Colts’ ownership is unusual in that Jim Irsay controls 100 percent of the team. He came into his own the old-fashioned way: the lad inherited an ancestral gold mine from his father. He was 37 years old at the time.

So, one guy has it all, answers to no one. And one guy has made the franchise relevant — Peyton Manning. Here’s the problem: Manning has had three neck operations, the last one on September 8. The man would be crazy to play football again. Can you say paralyzed in French? Okay, say he is crazy and wants to play again. You’re the owner of the Colts, you have to decide, just around the time Peyton turns 36, March of 2012, whether to hand over a bonus check for $28 million payable to three-neck-operations Peyton Manning in order to kick-in the last four years of his contract.

Let’s see...36 years old, three neck operations, a $28 million check due in March... You’d have to be crazy to sign Peyton Manning. You’d have to be double crazy to sign him when you have Andrew Luck waiting in the wings. What you’d do is trade Manning for as much as you can get and go with Luck.

Given a choice, people usually choose to do what has worked for them in the past. The Colts were a top franchise on the back of Peyton Manning. What could be more natural than to try it again with Andrew Luck?

The beauty of this is you only need a conspiracy of one. As supreme leader, just see to it that your quarterbacks are below marginal and the rest will follow. Players will catch on that you’re not trying. As will coaches. You might not lose every game, but you’ll likely lose enough to come in last.

The bet is Andrew Luck will be Peyton Manning 2. But, Luck hasn’t been looking that great lately. He missed the Heisman trophy again this year. He wouldn’t be the first number 1 or 2 draft pick to go bust.

Remember Ryan Leaf?

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Solo Jared Mattson, schizophrenic Reverend Stickman, festive Stick Figure, opener Nukem, floater Flogging Molly

“I got super into Japanese drifting and boxing.”
Next Article

Gonzo Report: Bang Bang’s Tokyo subway motif and Chicago house music

It’s a restaurant, it’s a nightclub, it’s a dope photo op
Young Mr. Luck missed the Heisman again this year, but he’ll still go number 1 or 2 in this year’s NFL draft.
Young Mr. Luck missed the Heisman again this year, but he’ll still go number 1 or 2 in this year’s NFL draft.

Six weeks ago I wrote a column about the Indianapolis Colts deliberately losing their games in order to guarantee owning the number 1 pick in April’s NFL draft. Said pick to be used to acquire Stanford’s once-in-a-generation quarterback Andrew Luck.

Things were strange six weeks ago, and that’s not counting Peyton Manning’s absence. I wrote, “But, it’s hard to believe the loss of one man, even a four-time MVP, causes a team that has made it to the playoffs every year for the past nine years in a row, a team that has been to the Super Bowl twice in the past five years...hard to believe the loss of that one man means that same team goes 0-8...”

The Colts were 0-8 then, now they’re 0-13, and it’s obvious they’re tanking. To replace Manning, the Colts ignored their backup quarterback, Curtis Painter (who was good enough to be on their roster for the past three seasons), and selected a retired 16-year veteran, Kerry Collins. Mr. Collins lasted three games. Then, Curtis Painter was dusted off and dubbed starter. As insurance, the Colts wisely signed not-a-household-name Dan Orlovsky, previously a second- and/or third-string quarterback for Detroit and Houston. Orlovsky was in between jobs.

This was going on while David Garrad, Carson Palmer, and Brett Favre were available. Any one of those quarterbacks will win games.

Sponsored
Sponsored

After Sunday’s 24-10 loss to Baltimore, in which, after three quarters, the Colts gained 53 yards in total offense, scored their lone touchdown on the final play of the game, head coach Jim Caldwell, using his deer-caught-in-headlights persona, said, “We just have to find a way to get our team better so we can get a victory.”

There are some positives coming out of that contest. Caldwell still has a job. Dan Orlovsky is quarterback. Detroit is the only team in NFL history to go 0-16, which was accomplished in 2008. Now, not only can Indianapolis match that low, but Orlovsky is just three losses away from being the only quarterback in NFL history to lead two, count ’em, two 0-16 teams.

Of course, if you play as badly as Indianapolis has, heads will roll. Larry Coyer, the defensive coordinator, was fired and replaced with Mike Murphy, 67, who, somehow, had been overlooked during his previous 14 years with the Colts. Defensive coordinator Murphy will continue his duties as linebackers coach. There’s a cost savings right off the top. Head coach Coyer said the change was made “to improve communication and production.” To complete this massive overhaul, Painter was demoted and backup QB Dan Orlovsky was named starting quarterback.

The Colts’ ownership is unusual in that Jim Irsay controls 100 percent of the team. He came into his own the old-fashioned way: the lad inherited an ancestral gold mine from his father. He was 37 years old at the time.

So, one guy has it all, answers to no one. And one guy has made the franchise relevant — Peyton Manning. Here’s the problem: Manning has had three neck operations, the last one on September 8. The man would be crazy to play football again. Can you say paralyzed in French? Okay, say he is crazy and wants to play again. You’re the owner of the Colts, you have to decide, just around the time Peyton turns 36, March of 2012, whether to hand over a bonus check for $28 million payable to three-neck-operations Peyton Manning in order to kick-in the last four years of his contract.

Let’s see...36 years old, three neck operations, a $28 million check due in March... You’d have to be crazy to sign Peyton Manning. You’d have to be double crazy to sign him when you have Andrew Luck waiting in the wings. What you’d do is trade Manning for as much as you can get and go with Luck.

Given a choice, people usually choose to do what has worked for them in the past. The Colts were a top franchise on the back of Peyton Manning. What could be more natural than to try it again with Andrew Luck?

The beauty of this is you only need a conspiracy of one. As supreme leader, just see to it that your quarterbacks are below marginal and the rest will follow. Players will catch on that you’re not trying. As will coaches. You might not lose every game, but you’ll likely lose enough to come in last.

The bet is Andrew Luck will be Peyton Manning 2. But, Luck hasn’t been looking that great lately. He missed the Heisman trophy again this year. He wouldn’t be the first number 1 or 2 draft pick to go bust.

Remember Ryan Leaf?

Comments
Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

The $100,000 gamble in Mission Hills

Editor's picks of Reader stories by David Steinman
Next Article

Solo Jared Mattson, schizophrenic Reverend Stickman, festive Stick Figure, opener Nukem, floater Flogging Molly

“I got super into Japanese drifting and boxing.”
Comments

Ryan Leaf... did you have to mention him?

Dec. 15, 2011

Ryan Leaf was a nightmare

Dec. 19, 2011

No pro team would purposely lose every game. One PLayer , a leader can make a difference, look at the Denver Broncos situation.

Dec. 20, 2011
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox [email protected] — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close