Quantcast
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Blackest Thumb by Amy Woods

When I first met my roommate, she was a very involved and social person. We were fine for the first year; neither of us was home often, as we kept busy. In the second year, everything changed. She went from being in a sorority, working at the gym, playing soccer at UCSD, and not being home much to almost literally doing nothing but staying home and studying. I never did learn exactly what happened, but all of a sudden she got kinda wacky.

As she started staying home more and more, Sarah started acting as if the apartment was hers. It began when she started making what I call “huffing and puffing” breathing sounds when I walked around our shared one-bedroom or opened a drawer looking for something or did, well, anything. This expulsion of air was her signal that I was distracting her from her intensive studying. It got to the point where I couldn’t even do laundry without the exhalation.

Eventually, even the regular, quiet noise of the bathroom light started bothering her. Seriously, the apartment might as well have been a library; no music or noise allowed. The worst came when I invited my boyfriend over for dinner one night — although we were in the living room, as far from her as possible, Sarah actually asked us to stop talking!

She would warn me 10 to 15 minutes before she was going to bed so that I could “get everything done” (brushing teeth, etc.) so as not to bother her during her sleep. This was fine...until the one time I needed to take a nap. Just as I was about to fall asleep, there was suddenly a ridiculous amount of noise from the living room. I got up and asked her what she was doing. No joke, she said she was “shredding last year’s receipts.”

Out of nowhere Sarah developed an obsession with plants, despite having the blackest thumb you’ve ever seen. Not only did she kill every plant she owned — and there were a lot, one after another — when the plant inevitably died, she would refuse to admit it! When one of her larger plants died on a windowsill — located on my half of the room, by the way — I asked her if she had realized that the plant had died. She shouted, “It isn’t dead!” and burst into tears. The dead plant sat there, curled over its pot, for the next six months. I was afraid to dispose of it.

Sarah would always leave two pieces of toilet paper on the roll so that she didn’t have to replace it. I bought all the toilet paper — perhaps my biggest pet peeve. At one point I noticed the characteristic two pieces short of empty. I was about to go home for a week for Christmas break, and Sarah was staying, so I didn’t replace the roll. Just to see what would happen. When I came home the roll was still empty.

Months later, as we were moving out, I saw a secret stash of toilet paper among her things.

Tell us the story of your roommate from hell and we will publish it and pay you ($100 for 500-2000 words).

E-mail story to
[email protected]
Or mail to:
San Diego Reader/Roommate
Box 85803
San Diego, CA 92186

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all

Previous article

When it's too hot for soup at Pho Ca Dao

Summery dishes fit for outdoor dining on a summer day in Mission Valley

When I first met my roommate, she was a very involved and social person. We were fine for the first year; neither of us was home often, as we kept busy. In the second year, everything changed. She went from being in a sorority, working at the gym, playing soccer at UCSD, and not being home much to almost literally doing nothing but staying home and studying. I never did learn exactly what happened, but all of a sudden she got kinda wacky.

As she started staying home more and more, Sarah started acting as if the apartment was hers. It began when she started making what I call “huffing and puffing” breathing sounds when I walked around our shared one-bedroom or opened a drawer looking for something or did, well, anything. This expulsion of air was her signal that I was distracting her from her intensive studying. It got to the point where I couldn’t even do laundry without the exhalation.

Eventually, even the regular, quiet noise of the bathroom light started bothering her. Seriously, the apartment might as well have been a library; no music or noise allowed. The worst came when I invited my boyfriend over for dinner one night — although we were in the living room, as far from her as possible, Sarah actually asked us to stop talking!

She would warn me 10 to 15 minutes before she was going to bed so that I could “get everything done” (brushing teeth, etc.) so as not to bother her during her sleep. This was fine...until the one time I needed to take a nap. Just as I was about to fall asleep, there was suddenly a ridiculous amount of noise from the living room. I got up and asked her what she was doing. No joke, she said she was “shredding last year’s receipts.”

Out of nowhere Sarah developed an obsession with plants, despite having the blackest thumb you’ve ever seen. Not only did she kill every plant she owned — and there were a lot, one after another — when the plant inevitably died, she would refuse to admit it! When one of her larger plants died on a windowsill — located on my half of the room, by the way — I asked her if she had realized that the plant had died. She shouted, “It isn’t dead!” and burst into tears. The dead plant sat there, curled over its pot, for the next six months. I was afraid to dispose of it.

Sarah would always leave two pieces of toilet paper on the roll so that she didn’t have to replace it. I bought all the toilet paper — perhaps my biggest pet peeve. At one point I noticed the characteristic two pieces short of empty. I was about to go home for a week for Christmas break, and Sarah was staying, so I didn’t replace the roll. Just to see what would happen. When I came home the roll was still empty.

Months later, as we were moving out, I saw a secret stash of toilet paper among her things.

Tell us the story of your roommate from hell and we will publish it and pay you ($100 for 500-2000 words).

E-mail story to
[email protected]
Or mail to:
San Diego Reader/Roommate
Box 85803
San Diego, CA 92186

Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Moved to tears by Dave’s Hot Chicken

Nashville hot chicken ranges from no spice, to hot, to the indemnified “reaper”
Next Article

Luna Bay Booch's San Diego origin story

Woman owned hard kombucha brand brewed elsewhere, now sold locally
Comments
1

Does anyone know if this was writen by Amy Wood from La Jolla/North PB, and who had friends from the 1980's named Janet & Nicole, ZACH, Tony, etc. If so, many people who miss her would greatly appreciate her sounding off to this email for a long-planned reunion of all our 1980's LJ/PB friends - here's the email:(volunteer_samaritan(at)live.com) {I omitted the '@' symbol from this post to prevent auto-spamming}. If you know Amy Wood(s) from Windsor? Street (around the year 1985) area in La Jolla PLEASE send an email immediately. Thank you!

Jan. 9, 2009

Sign in to comment

Sign in

Art Reviews — W.S. Di Piero's eye on exhibits Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Best Buys — San Diego shopping Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits City Lights — News and politics Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Famous Former Neighbors — Next-door celebs Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town Here's the Deal — Chad Deal's watering holes Just Announced — The scoop on shows Letters — Our inbox [email protected] — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Of Note — Concert picks Out & About — What's Happening Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Pour Over — Grab a cup Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer News — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Set 'em Up Joe — Bartenders' drink recipes Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Sports — Athletics without gush Street Style — San Diego streets have style Suit Up — Fashion tips for dudes Theater Reviews — Local productions Theater antireviews — Narrow your search Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Waterfront — All things ocean Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close