Lives: Chula Vista
I say Agamemnon a lot. If something's aggravating, instead of shortening it to aggro, I lengthen it to Agamemnon. I think he was an Egyptian or Greek king. I remember the name from school when I was a kid.
Something I'm using more often is from the show Top Design. In one of the episodes, someone said, "You're like the mayor of Excuses Village." I use that, but replace the "excuses" with whatever comes to me.
At work, I say, "You're like the mayor of Wining to Me Village," or "She's like the mayor of Irritating Village."