Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Scrabble Scrimmage

Children make the most desirable opponents in Scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat. -- Fran Lebowitz

'These are tough letters," I said, sliding my "Z" tile to the left of the "Y". I was bluffing, of course, and hid my smile when it dawned on me that if I could get my word, crazy, over that red square, I'd earn a whopping 57 points. This wasn't poker, but no matter the game, I always bluff. I am convinced this gives me a psychological advantage. Get them complacent and they'll take bigger risks. Tell them you're doing poorly and they'll listen to your words before discovering the truth -- you're slaughtering them. "You're playing Scrabble against Barb?" Because he had been facing his computer, David had missed my silent but eager challenge to our friend Nathan, which involved a mere shaking of the box in front of Nathan's face until he offered an indifferent "Sure."

"Yeah, I am," Nathan responded. "Why? Is she gonna kick my ass?"

"No, no, I'm sure you'll do fine," I quickly interjected, before David had a chance to ruin my next play. "And if you happen to lose," I added, "you shouldn't feel bad because I probably play more often than you do."

"Like every day on your Treo," David mumbled."

Sponsored
Sponsored

"What?" Nathan asked.

"Nothing, don't listen to him," I insisted. "It's your turn."

Nathan thoughtfully rubbed his recently grown Fu Manchu mustache. While he deliberated for what seemed like an eternity, I engaged the game I had going with my Treo -- I was ahead of the computer by 70 points. Finally, Nathan placed the tiles "C", "A", and "T" on the big board between us.

"Seven points, not bad!" Stroke their egos and they won't forfeit before you have your chance to shine. He'd opened me up for the triple and I seized the opportunity, making a show of counting my points slowly, deliberately. It's easy to get over being a sore loser. Being a good winner is another thing entirely. "Fifty seven!" Self-satisfaction was evident in my tone. "Wow, that's even good for me. It's your turn again."

Two weeks before I opened this can of whoop-ass on Nathan, I played Scrabble with David's two nieces at his parents' house. We played teams, with the 8-year-old on my team and the 11-year-old on Ellen's. It was supposed to be fun, a way to engage the girls. But Ellen and I are Scrabble adversaries, which made it impossible for me to let my guard down.

"No, no, that's not a word," I said. "Let's check the dictionary." Ellen verified that I was correct -- the word she and Becca had fabricated was more make-believe than Narnia. Does it really matter? I asked myself. Yes. It's not a word, and by the way, that play would have set them ahead, I answered. Then, forcing myself to appear humble and understanding, I said, "You can play it anyway, I just thought it would be good if the girls could improve upon their vocabulary." Another bluff.

Gauging my sincerity, Ellen said, "No, that's okay, we'll think of another word." I sighed with relief and waited for my turn -- I mean Carly's and my turn. "We" won by a landslide.

It's human nature to be competitive and, at least in our culture, it's common to want to be the best at whatever it is you're doing. If the spectrum of competitiveness were Kinsey's scale of sexuality, I'd be a badass bull-dyke.

Despite my competitive nature, I've never earned first place in any of the many contests I've entered. But games are different; they offer me a chance to come out on top. To be the best at something, even if it that something is a simple game of Slap-Jack, which is a card-game turned wrestling match when I play against my sister Jenny.

Jenny is just as bad as I am when it comes to competition. We both play to win and she who loses does not go down gracefully. Handing us a deck of cards is like putting two captains on the bridge of the Starship Enterprise. In Slap-Jack, we each get half the deck and face each other Indian-style. We alternately toss a card face-up into a pile and when a jack appears, the first one to slap it gets all the cards stacked up beneath -- the goal is to get the most cards.

If Jenny makes it to that jack first, she earns an immediate retributive slap to the back of her hand before she has a chance to lift it off the jack. And vice versa. The first hit is easy to justify because our hands are moving so fast to get that jack. But we work ourselves into slapping fits -- I hit the jack, she hits my hand, I hit hers, and the cycle continues. To spare our dignity, Jenny and I keep to more civilized games of chance, like Sequence.

These days, my favorite game is Scrabble. I've become somewhat of a Scrabble geek worthy of a place next to the nerds depicted in the Scrabble documentary, Word Wars. There's no telling when or where you'll come across one of these game geeks. Last summer, Dr. Michael Baden of HBO's Autopsy and his lovely wife, Linda, dropped in to visit David's parents and happened upon David and me playing Scrabble in the kitchen. Thirty minutes later, Michael was tossing down medical terms and it was clear that Linda had memorized every two- and three-letter word in the Official Scrabble Dictionary.

I still think we should have challenged some of that forensic jargon, but I doubt that would have given us much of a chance. Because English is their second language, David's parents chose to sip their coffee and observe the intent, single-minded creatures their guests, and son, had become. After kicking our asses and stifling their urge to gloat, Michael and Linda bid their hosts adieu and left me and David sulking.

The old saying about tennis suggests that if you play with someone who is better than you, your own skills will improve. I don't like that saying. I don't like to play Scrabble with Heather, an English teacher, because she always wins. David is hit or miss. But Nathan, on the other hand, is a joy to play with.

"What's the score?" He'd done okay, considering his novice status.

"320 to 190," I answered. "But that's not a bad score, I mean, I just scored 385 against my Treo, so you held your own, man."

Nathan swore he would practice and come back over to challenge me and win back his pride. While he was taking it in stride and sharing with me his plan for my ultimate Scrabble demise, I recited the two- and three-letter words in my head and tried to remember those terms I'd looked up in the Physician's Desk Reference. If we teamed up, David and me against Michael and Linda, I might just be able to beat them. But if we lose again, I have a back-up plan -- to challenge the good doctor to an old-fashioned game of cards and slap my way to victory.

The latest copy of the Reader

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Aaron Bleiweiss: has guitar, has traveled

Seattle native takes Twists and Turns to assemble local all-stars
Next Article

Colorado governor Polis’ days in La Jolla canyons

Why Kamala might not run for Calif. governor

Children make the most desirable opponents in Scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat. -- Fran Lebowitz

'These are tough letters," I said, sliding my "Z" tile to the left of the "Y". I was bluffing, of course, and hid my smile when it dawned on me that if I could get my word, crazy, over that red square, I'd earn a whopping 57 points. This wasn't poker, but no matter the game, I always bluff. I am convinced this gives me a psychological advantage. Get them complacent and they'll take bigger risks. Tell them you're doing poorly and they'll listen to your words before discovering the truth -- you're slaughtering them. "You're playing Scrabble against Barb?" Because he had been facing his computer, David had missed my silent but eager challenge to our friend Nathan, which involved a mere shaking of the box in front of Nathan's face until he offered an indifferent "Sure."

"Yeah, I am," Nathan responded. "Why? Is she gonna kick my ass?"

"No, no, I'm sure you'll do fine," I quickly interjected, before David had a chance to ruin my next play. "And if you happen to lose," I added, "you shouldn't feel bad because I probably play more often than you do."

"Like every day on your Treo," David mumbled."

Sponsored
Sponsored

"What?" Nathan asked.

"Nothing, don't listen to him," I insisted. "It's your turn."

Nathan thoughtfully rubbed his recently grown Fu Manchu mustache. While he deliberated for what seemed like an eternity, I engaged the game I had going with my Treo -- I was ahead of the computer by 70 points. Finally, Nathan placed the tiles "C", "A", and "T" on the big board between us.

"Seven points, not bad!" Stroke their egos and they won't forfeit before you have your chance to shine. He'd opened me up for the triple and I seized the opportunity, making a show of counting my points slowly, deliberately. It's easy to get over being a sore loser. Being a good winner is another thing entirely. "Fifty seven!" Self-satisfaction was evident in my tone. "Wow, that's even good for me. It's your turn again."

Two weeks before I opened this can of whoop-ass on Nathan, I played Scrabble with David's two nieces at his parents' house. We played teams, with the 8-year-old on my team and the 11-year-old on Ellen's. It was supposed to be fun, a way to engage the girls. But Ellen and I are Scrabble adversaries, which made it impossible for me to let my guard down.

"No, no, that's not a word," I said. "Let's check the dictionary." Ellen verified that I was correct -- the word she and Becca had fabricated was more make-believe than Narnia. Does it really matter? I asked myself. Yes. It's not a word, and by the way, that play would have set them ahead, I answered. Then, forcing myself to appear humble and understanding, I said, "You can play it anyway, I just thought it would be good if the girls could improve upon their vocabulary." Another bluff.

Gauging my sincerity, Ellen said, "No, that's okay, we'll think of another word." I sighed with relief and waited for my turn -- I mean Carly's and my turn. "We" won by a landslide.

It's human nature to be competitive and, at least in our culture, it's common to want to be the best at whatever it is you're doing. If the spectrum of competitiveness were Kinsey's scale of sexuality, I'd be a badass bull-dyke.

Despite my competitive nature, I've never earned first place in any of the many contests I've entered. But games are different; they offer me a chance to come out on top. To be the best at something, even if it that something is a simple game of Slap-Jack, which is a card-game turned wrestling match when I play against my sister Jenny.

Jenny is just as bad as I am when it comes to competition. We both play to win and she who loses does not go down gracefully. Handing us a deck of cards is like putting two captains on the bridge of the Starship Enterprise. In Slap-Jack, we each get half the deck and face each other Indian-style. We alternately toss a card face-up into a pile and when a jack appears, the first one to slap it gets all the cards stacked up beneath -- the goal is to get the most cards.

If Jenny makes it to that jack first, she earns an immediate retributive slap to the back of her hand before she has a chance to lift it off the jack. And vice versa. The first hit is easy to justify because our hands are moving so fast to get that jack. But we work ourselves into slapping fits -- I hit the jack, she hits my hand, I hit hers, and the cycle continues. To spare our dignity, Jenny and I keep to more civilized games of chance, like Sequence.

These days, my favorite game is Scrabble. I've become somewhat of a Scrabble geek worthy of a place next to the nerds depicted in the Scrabble documentary, Word Wars. There's no telling when or where you'll come across one of these game geeks. Last summer, Dr. Michael Baden of HBO's Autopsy and his lovely wife, Linda, dropped in to visit David's parents and happened upon David and me playing Scrabble in the kitchen. Thirty minutes later, Michael was tossing down medical terms and it was clear that Linda had memorized every two- and three-letter word in the Official Scrabble Dictionary.

I still think we should have challenged some of that forensic jargon, but I doubt that would have given us much of a chance. Because English is their second language, David's parents chose to sip their coffee and observe the intent, single-minded creatures their guests, and son, had become. After kicking our asses and stifling their urge to gloat, Michael and Linda bid their hosts adieu and left me and David sulking.

The old saying about tennis suggests that if you play with someone who is better than you, your own skills will improve. I don't like that saying. I don't like to play Scrabble with Heather, an English teacher, because she always wins. David is hit or miss. But Nathan, on the other hand, is a joy to play with.

"What's the score?" He'd done okay, considering his novice status.

"320 to 190," I answered. "But that's not a bad score, I mean, I just scored 385 against my Treo, so you held your own, man."

Nathan swore he would practice and come back over to challenge me and win back his pride. While he was taking it in stride and sharing with me his plan for my ultimate Scrabble demise, I recited the two- and three-letter words in my head and tried to remember those terms I'd looked up in the Physician's Desk Reference. If we teamed up, David and me against Michael and Linda, I might just be able to beat them. But if we lose again, I have a back-up plan -- to challenge the good doctor to an old-fashioned game of cards and slap my way to victory.

Comments
Sponsored

The latest copy of the Reader

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Mang Tomas, banana ketchup barred in San Diego

What will happen to Filipino Christmas here?
Next Article

Birdwatching bonanza, earliest sunset of the year, bulb planting time

Venus shines its brightest
Comments
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader