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Babies, Breast Feeding, and More

I was thinking a lot about breast feeding today. It's not the usual thing guys think of when they see womens breasts. Even if you have a baby, I'm sure you don't look at your wife in a nice outfit and say "Look at those breasts! I'm sure little Johnny is going to love the next time he's getting some milk."

Okay, that was a bad example. Nobody is naming their baby "Johnny" any more. And you don't call your own baby "Little" do you? Unless he's an old blues singer or plays a mean harp, like Little Walter.

I see women with breast implants and wonder if they can breast feed. Or will the kid get a mouthful of silicon?

Anyway, I started thinking about all this when I heard about some women that were protesting somewhere. I kept missing the story, so I have no clue where it was. I think about 30 women were protesting because a woman wasn't allowed to breast feed at that business.

I remembered a few weeks back hearing about a woman that got arrested for breast feeding her baby in public. But that was because she was drunk (note to women that are breast feeding in public while intoxicated: It's less noticable if you aren't holding your child upside down).

I started thinking about the controversy that arose months ago, when a Spanish toymaker made a doll that breast fed. Geez, when I was a kid, my little sister got a baby doll that wet itself. If breast feeding Barbies were around when I was a boy, I would've never bought another squirt gun!

Anyway, I have no problem seeing a woman breast feeding in public. Although, I can't say I have sympathy for the woman when a business asks them to use a restroom, or to be more discreet. That seems like a normal request, especially when other customers might be bothered by a boob flopping out.

You can't use the argument that it's "natural" because so is urinating, but when I have to go, I don't just unzip and start peeing right where I'm standing. I do what every other male does. I go behind whatever bush is nearest to me.

This reminded me of a controversy a few weeks ago, that was a lot crazier. I think it was somewhere in Missouri.

The manager of a Burger King kicked out a woman and her baby. And, no breast feeding was involved.

So, what would your next guess be?

Perhaps the child wouldn't stop crying (oh, I wish people got kicked out of places for that). Maybe you think the baby soiled a diaper, and other customers complained of the smell.

Nope. The baby wasn't wearing any shoes. And this manager said that Burger King had a policy that you needed shoes. The mother said her baby was only 6-months old, and she was holding it. The manager wasn't swayed.

I'm guessing he pointed to a sign like in Fast Times.

"No Shirts. No Shoes. No Service."

Now, I get grossed out by feet just as much as anyone. I once met a gorgeous woman who asked me to suck on her toes. I told her to get lost, even though I figured sucking toes might lead to other parts being sucked.

Yet a babies feet...heck, I'd kiss those cute little toes all over. They're adorable.

The BK apologized. And who knows, probably offered them a lifetime of Happy Meals or something.

The woman will probably sue for millions, because that's what we do in this society. If I were her, I'd just have a shirt made that said "BK stands for Bring Keds."

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I was thinking a lot about breast feeding today. It's not the usual thing guys think of when they see womens breasts. Even if you have a baby, I'm sure you don't look at your wife in a nice outfit and say "Look at those breasts! I'm sure little Johnny is going to love the next time he's getting some milk."

Okay, that was a bad example. Nobody is naming their baby "Johnny" any more. And you don't call your own baby "Little" do you? Unless he's an old blues singer or plays a mean harp, like Little Walter.

I see women with breast implants and wonder if they can breast feed. Or will the kid get a mouthful of silicon?

Anyway, I started thinking about all this when I heard about some women that were protesting somewhere. I kept missing the story, so I have no clue where it was. I think about 30 women were protesting because a woman wasn't allowed to breast feed at that business.

I remembered a few weeks back hearing about a woman that got arrested for breast feeding her baby in public. But that was because she was drunk (note to women that are breast feeding in public while intoxicated: It's less noticable if you aren't holding your child upside down).

I started thinking about the controversy that arose months ago, when a Spanish toymaker made a doll that breast fed. Geez, when I was a kid, my little sister got a baby doll that wet itself. If breast feeding Barbies were around when I was a boy, I would've never bought another squirt gun!

Anyway, I have no problem seeing a woman breast feeding in public. Although, I can't say I have sympathy for the woman when a business asks them to use a restroom, or to be more discreet. That seems like a normal request, especially when other customers might be bothered by a boob flopping out.

You can't use the argument that it's "natural" because so is urinating, but when I have to go, I don't just unzip and start peeing right where I'm standing. I do what every other male does. I go behind whatever bush is nearest to me.

This reminded me of a controversy a few weeks ago, that was a lot crazier. I think it was somewhere in Missouri.

The manager of a Burger King kicked out a woman and her baby. And, no breast feeding was involved.

So, what would your next guess be?

Perhaps the child wouldn't stop crying (oh, I wish people got kicked out of places for that). Maybe you think the baby soiled a diaper, and other customers complained of the smell.

Nope. The baby wasn't wearing any shoes. And this manager said that Burger King had a policy that you needed shoes. The mother said her baby was only 6-months old, and she was holding it. The manager wasn't swayed.

I'm guessing he pointed to a sign like in Fast Times.

"No Shirts. No Shoes. No Service."

Now, I get grossed out by feet just as much as anyone. I once met a gorgeous woman who asked me to suck on her toes. I told her to get lost, even though I figured sucking toes might lead to other parts being sucked.

Yet a babies feet...heck, I'd kiss those cute little toes all over. They're adorable.

The BK apologized. And who knows, probably offered them a lifetime of Happy Meals or something.

The woman will probably sue for millions, because that's what we do in this society. If I were her, I'd just have a shirt made that said "BK stands for Bring Keds."

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