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"Look," says Abyss Creations CEO Ina Nimate, "nobody is saying that what Mayor Filner did was okay. But the pattern of behavior clearly points to something compulsive. The poor man was at the mercy of his own habits. There's all kinds of data to show that these habits are triggered by stress, and their indulgence actually releases chemicals in the brain that relieve stress. A lot of people masturbate for this reason. Apparently, Mayor Filner gropes. To be deprived of his chief form of release now, at what is probably the most stressful time of his life - well, it's pretty rough. Remember, addiction is a disease."

"And here's the thing," continues Nimate, "He's trying to be good now. He apologized, he got counseling, he set up structures to prevent his groping in the future, and eventually, he resigned altogether. At this point, San Diego is punishing him for doing the right thing. That's not right, and that's why we're sending him Cindy (above). Cindy is a top-of-the-line second-generation RealDoll, made of flesh-like silicone that has been applied to a rigid skeleton with stainless steel joints. She's extremely flexible and pliant, and it's a safe bet that she will never come forward with a complaint about his behavior."

Comments
1

Very interesting article of fiction. That's actually our Alektra Blue Wicked RealDoll. We didn't actually say anything about Bob Filner, nor did we send him a doll. Who's your editor, Mr. Mencken? Even if it's in the fake news you could at least ask for permission to use our name and our picture...and possibly post our website for our troubles? www.realdoll.com

Sept. 12, 2013

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4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
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