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The Fetishist
Oh, yes, forgot to mention: For emotional SM, see A Heart in Winter (Un coeur en hiver) with Emmanuelle Beart and Daniel Auteuil.— October 6, 2009 8:51 p.m.
The Fetishist
scrabble*scrabble*scrabble*scrabble*scrabble* scrabble*scrabble*scrabble I agree with nan in #45. Though, as AG or RG would say, I love me some Geoffrey Rush! scrabble*scrabble*scrabble*scrabble*scrabble* scrabble*scrabble*scrabble— October 6, 2009 8:49 p.m.
Johnny Law
"ditto SDaniels...and i don't think Pete started this guilt s***..he's the one who deserves an apology" Nan, I get what you are saying, but you know that part of the problem is that we cannot go back to the past, and obtain an apology from those who hurt us. And would it really matter? There was some film where a guy goes back to apologize for taunting a girl in grade school--wish I could remember the name of this film. At any rate, she is not thankful, and sees right through his intentions as ultimately self-serving. He wanted to feel better about HIMself, and his seeking her out just brought back old pain for her. I think the idea is to heal and go on without needing that apology from the past. Letting go of the iron fist squeezing the emotional life out of one's present and future, and making peace, if not friends, with the past...— October 6, 2009 7:50 p.m.
Johnny Law
"That's the sticking point,SD. The sexuality. If you and I were ever to sit next to each other in a bar and strike up some small talk,you'd never in a million years guess that I like sex with men now and then." Maybe I would not have guessed, but then again maybe I would, being pretty sharp about human psychology :) It still sounds like you are feeling the guilt about it, friend, and the gay slurs you've tossed around are ultimately a cruel form of self-torture. That's gotta stop. And why do you need to define your life so carefully, identifying as being either gay OR straight? Why not embrace yourself in ambiguity, perhaps as a bisexual, or someone who loves who he loves? If you really no longer were attracted to women, and were just living a lie, then sure, it would be better to drop the facade. But you do love women, too, and feel that you are in better sync living with them, at least for now. Maybe sometime down the road, you'll find a man with whom you feel you could set up house--maybe not. Either way, the idea is to be happy as much as you can, and let go of the guilt, accumulating over a lifetime. Delicious psychological freedom--that's what I wish for you, friend :)— October 6, 2009 7:45 p.m.
The Fetishist
(cont.) Kids are cruel, and we have to deal with the fallout for years afterward. The redheaded kid who suffered the "ugly" tag, the Mexican or Black kid alone in a sea of white faces, the "nerdy" kid with the wrong clothes and lingo (that would be me), and the sullen outcasts who--horror of horrors--ate lunch alone (that would also be me). Kids are the worst when it comes to intolerance of and punishment of difference. Mini Hitlers. It is sad to see that deeply-blushing 13-year old, embarrassed to be alive, who can't meet anyone's gaze. When I see this, I say a silent mantra for them that they will find the freedom and courage that comes with no longer caring what others think of you. I look forward to more of your thoughtful blogs, Pete :)— October 6, 2009 7:35 p.m.
The Fetishist
"Besides Fumbar and a couple of other random douchebags who actually had the balls to email me and tell me they were going to try their hardest to get me banned,I noticed that I had to give respect where due. You're a VERY intelligent woman,SD." Who has been harassing you on email? If fumbler took the time to email you, then you should consider that a sort of compliment--he hasn't had the time to slam me yet, apparently :) If anyone else harasses you repeatedly, just start posting their "private" messages here on your blog--see refried's blog for example. That should put a stop to it. You know, it's funny Pete. I haven't blogged on any sites besides this one, so can't compare--but I instinctively just know that it must be different. I was horrified by you, until you began to open up and started that blog. It was clear that you were a person in a lot of pain, and had quite a bit to get off your chest. I am really glad to see you do it, and that you found the courage, my friend. You have realized that we are not just nameless entities at whom you can spew--we are real people with feelings, too. I'm sure your therapist is just as proud of you as we are. I like this new Pete :) As for the intimidation growing up, I can totally relate. I was a kid who was abused outside of school, but kept it quiet, and did fine at private school, while public school was a disaster. I was considered the smartest kid at school, and had a lot of friends until I transferred in sixth grade to a public school. There, the only group who would take me in was a group of Mexican girls who were considered the "good" girls--not in gangs, and who didn't ditch class. I remember these three girls with a lot of fondness; they still took me in, even though they made fun of my way of speaking, my vocabulary, and my clothes. My mother had to spring for a couple of Izod shirts and some Jordache jeans, which I wore over and over, so I wouldn't continue to get beat up for wearing the standard private school uniform of long skirts and socks. I was quiet for years, afraid to be ridiculed or hurt physically, with the exception of giving the class clown a fat lip, after he challenged me to a fight at the bus stop. My friends carried me off in triumph, saying I won the fight, but the triumph was short lived, and the taunting continued.— October 6, 2009 7:34 p.m.
Johnny Law
I hope you have worked out of the guilt at this point in life--that is the key here--letting go of that irrational guilt you have been carrying since then. Whatever you did, you know it was for survival, and you should never be ashamed for exploring your budding sexuality, either. xoxoxo— October 6, 2009 7:16 p.m.
Deep Blue Sea
welwitschia mirabilis noun curious plant of arid regions of southwestern Africa having a yard-high and yard-wide trunk like a turnip with a deep taproot and two large persistent woody straplike leaves growing from the base; living relic of a flora long disappeared; some may be 700-5000 years old [syn: welwitschia] Noooo, it's not like we're in search of one of theessse grails, yah dude! So Pike N Adam's field guide for the discerning "Yah Dude" in you! Or, How to Make Friends and Influence Yah Dudes!— October 6, 2009 6:23 p.m.
i designate Pike or Fish to swim in with the Catch of the Day with this one
"If anyone knows of a three foot tall, 500 pound, wrinkled, warted, crooked-spined, dark and dirty fish species, let me know!!" C'mon Fishy, ya know you can do better than that! We'll find you an incredible Mr. Limpit yet, maybe on crabslist! :) re: #14: Ah, tes paroles sont si belles, nanou!— October 6, 2009 6:07 p.m.
i designate Pike or Fish to swim in with the Catch of the Day with this one
Fish is a langorous, diaphonous-sleeved betta :)— October 6, 2009 5:04 p.m.