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Domino's (the pizza, not the game)
Yes, I did. But I felt guilty about it. I even said to the guy, "Dude...I'll still tip you. And, even though I have this crappy apartment in Clairemont, ask the other drivers. I always tip. My stepbrother delivered at Domino's all thru high school and college, and I know about how bad it is not to tip." I think the driver did what cops do. They're so used to excuses from people that want it their way, that they never believe anything you say. My best pizza story, though, involved a place called All-American Pizza, also in Clairemont. I was 20, and my roommate was a childhood friend. They put a big sign out saying "all you can eat pizza on Sundays. Watch football here." Well, as fantasy football players, we were there. And we said "Let's not eat for 3 days, so we're so damn hungry, we eat a lot." It was $6, and they gave you salad, spaghetti, and a medium, two topping pizza. If you finished all that, they'd give you as more if you wanted. It was a family of red-heads running the joint, and nobody was in there. We felt so bad. My friend yelled at me, "Don't eat the salad, dumb ass!!! That's what he wants. He wants you to fill up on cheap lettuce, so you don't eat more pizza." He then yelled at me later, "Don't eat the crust!!!" "But I like the crust." "Don't eat the crust!!! Again, you're filling up, when you can just get another pizza. We got to our third medium pizza, and I almost puked. The guy said "Are you sure you can eat another pizza. We're losing money on this." A big fat guy walked in, and we said "Cool. He's going to help us put this place out of business." But he surprised us by only ordering a meatball sandwich and soda. The place was out of business a month later, and we liked to joke that we drove them there with our Sunday afternoon eating splurge.— April 17, 2009 3:55 p.m.
Junk Talk
I never saw the ad with the boat leaking, but that sounds awesome. I promise, magic, the next Off the Cuff will be worst commercial.— April 17, 2009 3:50 p.m.
Live from New York...It's Saturday Night!
An honorable mention would be Kevin Nealon. I loved him. Not just doing the news, but the few characters he did, killed me. When Miller mentioned Ackroyd, I didn't think I'd rank him so high. Then I thought of all the characters he did. And he did a lot! It could be a goofy commercial for the Bass-o-Matic, or whatever. Murray was a two-note actor. Agreed. But damn, his SNL characters were so funny. The lounge singer, the guy that gave Radner noogies...all great stuff. I do think it's odd that he gets such praise as an actor, when he's always playing the same character. It's that...I'm old and tired, and disappointed by life, and I have this look on my face, and everyone will laugh and feel for me, and talk about how deep this performance is. I swear, that college movie he did with the nerdy kid...can't think of the name. It was cute, but so damn overrated! mike, you do what people always do when they are hardcore into their politics. They can't listen to a person with the opposite views. Miller is one of the few that let Democrats call his show, and state their case. Now, Rush and Glenn Beck, those guys are the biggest windbags on the planet. Miller is actually funny. He knows a lot about sports and movies, and is great to listen to. I don't agree with any of his politics. And, I find it odd that everyone says he was a hardcore liberal until 9/11. To me, if you are hardcore one way, and it just takes one event to make you go extreme the other way, you're actually an idiot. I hate, absolutely hate...the type of people that are, let's say...against the death penalty. they feel you shouldn't murder another human, and they can be rehabilitated, or whatever their view is. Then, their aunt is murdered by some thug, and they all of the sudden, want the death penalty. TO me, that just shows that person to be a complete and selfish idiot. When you think about your causes, and what they stand for, you should already be thinking about the American autoworker. It shouldn't be when you lose your job, and the country is having problems, that you start getting concerned. And, so...if Miller was that stupid, he didn't realize that Republicans are tougher with the borders and they spend more on military, and whatever else he likes, well then he's an idiot that didn't understand the issues the first time, so he loses credibility this time around.— April 17, 2009 9:32 a.m.
Celebrity Idiots -- The Jamie Fox and Hulk Hogan Edition
mike1: this guy I worked with in radio, Kevin Cranker....if I dropped a name like that, he'd bend over. Someone would ask him what he was doing and he'd say "I'm picking up that name Josh just dropped." It was hysterical. But yeah...I paid $500 for a benefit with McCartney. So, I'm going to milk that name drop for all it's worth!— April 17, 2009 9:25 a.m.
Celebrity Idiots -- The Jamie Fox and Hulk Hogan Edition
ovod, you make valid points (and I'll be the first to admit, my examples and analogies often suck). but the thing is, people (ie MEN), have to realize, that you just can't go thru society speaking that way. it's the same way rappers don't understand why it's so bad to call a woman a "bitch" and a "ho" or whatever. although, maybe i contradict myself, because as much as i think those words can hurt in society, with young people using them so freely, i have no problem with violent video games, and this pychiatrist i used to play basketball with...that was his big thing. he hated violent video games. and, he wouldn't take his two kids to see The Lion King when it came out, because of the "violence." To me, that's extreme. but he had a point. ovod, when you bring up the "die for you," I've always found men that utter those phrases to be a bit sad. yes, it's implied that if you marry a woman, you are in love. you would kill for her...meaning, if someone broke into your house, or did something horrible to her. but, here's an example of unhealthy attitudes. a good friend of mine was dating a man who was like this. he has a daugther from a previous marriage, and he said that if anything ever happened to her, he'd kill himself. that may sound sweet and wonderful to some, that he loves his child this much. to me, it's a litle bit sick. an adult male has to be above those emotions, where you are going to kill someone for sleeping with your ex. or, even wanting to punch that guy. UNLESS the guy was Hulk Hogans former friend, then he can be angry about it. otherwise, he's got to let it go, or losen up those headbands that are too tight on his brain and creating this funky decisions he's making. because, if i could talk to hulk, I would say this: Do you realize OJ had beat his wife on numerous occasions? And he cheated on her on numerous occasions. So, when she doesn't want to reconcile, for the 5th time, is that really hard for you to understand? And, if she lit candles, and is looking forward to a new, younger guy coming over...as you hide out in the bushes, angry that she isn't taking you back, is that how you feel OJ? That she should've taken him back? For what? TO get beaten again, when he loses his temper? And, Hulk would say to me: Well, I didn't mean all that. I just meant I understood his anger. To which I would reply: That's exactly why the anger YOU have, and OJ had, is missplaced and unwarranted. (at this point, I'd try to explain other things to the Hulkster, but he'd probably get me in a headlock and joke me out like I was Richard Belzer)— April 17, 2009 9:24 a.m.
Domino's (the pizza, not the game)
I feel bad that I made fun of their pizza, comparing it to cardboard. Because the fact is, I actually love their pizza (no, my lawyer didn't make me say that). The only "fast food" pizza I don't like is Pizza Hut. Yes, felony charges. That's the story I read. They stopped doing the 30 minutes or free, when some Domino's driver ran over someone, by speeding in a residential area. Yeah, in my college days, I got many a free pizza. The best was...right after I'd hang up the phone to place my order, I'd glance at the digital display on the VCR. I would add 30 to that, and that's the time they had. And, I always gave them one additional minute, in case their clock was different, or whatever. Well, once the dude was 6 minutes late. Now, I'm not mad. I just want my free pie. The guy disputed it, called his store, and it was getting ugly. I had to explain my procedure, and I sounded like Jewy Jewstein, saying "I add 30 minutes to this number here, and...." Mike, I love Elvis. Damn, I really do. I have a collection of CDs of all his early Sun Studio stuff that is the cats meow. I even like his later day stuff...Little Sister, Hunk of Burning Love. I guess I just wrote that because, Fats just doesn't get any love. The guy was amazing. The singles he released were so damn catchy. And, all anybody knows is Blueberry Hill because of Happy Days. So, yeah...I guess I take Elvis over Fats, but just barely.— April 17, 2009 9:11 a.m.
Celebrity Idiots -- The Jamie Fox and Hulk Hogan Edition
Well, there are only a few times I understood O.J. One of them was when he ran in the airport because he was late for a flight. The other was when he ran, really really fast, away from 260 pound linebackers trying to tackle him as he walted to the end zone. I just don't get that type of anger. In 6th grade, my girlfriend Nikkie made out with Leo Ferns in the bushes, while I was playing basketball. I got upset, and cried walking home. The next day, I didn't throw a dodge ball at her on the playground at school. I ignored her. She ignored me. And a few weeks later, Loreen was my girlfriend. And, that type of logic has worked well thru out my life. If you get a broken heart, or give one...try to be as civil as you can. Again, his wife may be in her 40s and dating a young guy. Yes, that might be upsetting, but he too, is dating a young woman (and I believe, is also in his late 40s or 50s....this was also a friend of his daughters, which to me, isn't cool). I greatly appreciate your apology on calling me an idiot. That was classy of you. And, it wasn't necessary. I realize, that by me always spouting off about this celebrity or that celebrity being an idiot, I too, should be able to take it if someone calls me one. Whether I feel it's warranted or not. I realize I use the word "idiot" often in my vocabulary. In fact, I have a blog topic I'm going to write right now, and I'm planning on using that word at least twice.— April 17, 2009 12:33 a.m.
Junk Talk
Wait a second...you mean to tell me one of those goofballs like Pete, hasn't posted yet to make some kind of joke about eating meat, and uh....oh, nevermind. Anyone see the great episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm where his wife loses a part in The V Monologues because of him? It was hysterical. Barb...did your sister think to tell her daughter that she doesn't need to say that word all the time? I remember as kids, our parents told us never to use the slang words. We had to say "penis" (much like the "jine" part gets you in the other word, I think with this it's the "is" part...no problem with the "pee" part of that). Or, for my little sister, she had to say "vagina". Which she proudly did, in a store, when she had to yell that the underwear was going up it. Much to the horror of my mom, who had everyone staring at her. But, if my sister was always using the word, my parents would've (i'm guessing) told her she doesn't need to say that all the time. Instead, it seems almost like what happened, will just have her continuing to use it, to illicit shock from the adults.— April 17, 2009 12:27 a.m.
What was your first pet?
the last time i heard someone say something about the pretties pink and white bum hole they ever saw...i was running out of the Brass Rail in Hillcrest! those were great stories, although i disagree, lallaw. The question isn't one of my favorites. for some reason, i thought i'd get a great variety of answers. the first 10 people all had dogs! magic...my friend Larry, a teacher at point loma high school, had a pet duck. he told his class about his mom giving it to a neighbor. and the neighbor ended up cooking it and eating it. so, a few students in the class did a short film called "Lucky Duck." nothing cuter then watching the little guys waddle behind their mommy around a lake.— April 16, 2009 4:56 p.m.
Celebrity Idiots -- The Jamie Fox and Hulk Hogan Edition
Well, ovod...that's a very good point. You should've started with that, and you could've very easily then slid into me being an idiot myself. It would've bolstered your case. And, my response to that would be this: I've never been married. But I have to imagine divorce is hard. Especially in his case, as he wanted to work things out, and she didn't. But, when that happens, the guy can't be angry in a way that isn't healthy. You can be angry and vent to friends, or a pyschiatrist, or whatever. Hulk met her when he was a famous wrestler. She got breast implants. Not that there's anything wrong with either of those things, but he got a certain type of woman, that was/is looking for a certain type of guy. So, if she's with a pretty boy, that's only 19 years old, why does that shock him? It's like these rock stars, marrying some gorgeous groupie, and then being surprised when they run off with Ritchie Sambora! In regards to living life under the microscope, that too, is a good point you bring up. But, 95% of the celebrities out there seem to do that with very little problems. Even with paparazzi constantly being in their face. So, when one doesn't, and attacks a cameraman the way Woody Harrelson did...it's hard for me to sympathize. I've met McCartney on a few occasions, and there was always huge crowds waiting to meet him, get an autograph, ask if he can help them financially, or whatever. He's always gracious, talks to everyone, shakes hands, signs autographs...and he must get that crap 24/7. If he can do that, any star can. And, Hulk didn't seem to think about how him dating a 20-something hottie, would affect his ex-wife, or perhaps his children. He's just angry when his ex-wife does it. That's a bit hypocritical. When Hogan goes on about knowing how OJ feels, and how he wanted to slit some throats, in a way, it's almost a bizarre form of condoning spousal abuse. Because, in reality, no man should ever be angry enough to want to slit a throat.— April 16, 2009 4:52 p.m.