4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Olympic Games Party

Shaun White has nothing on Morph Man.

The invitations went out through Facebook. They included a photo of my man in a morphsuit: full-body stretchy spandex, red and white stripes over the face, stars down the right arm, the American flag. This patriotic fellow was holding a sign that read, “Go for the Gold. Opening Ceremonies party at the Kelly House.”

On the night of the Olympic Games Party at the Kelly house, hubby Patrick donned the stretchy suit and greeted our guests, whose reactions ranged from stunned silence to high fives and cries of “Epic!” (USA Flag Morphsuit, $33.26 for a large on Amazon).

I channeled the first Olympiad and put on a cream Grecian gown and a gold laurel wreath (California Costumes’ Olympic Goddess costume, $27.34 on Amazon). Work pal James showed up in a USA flag beanie ($10.84 on Amazon) and socks in red, white, and blue (Stance brand’s the Fourth Sock, $12.99 for a large pair on Amazon). Dan arrived in his Patriotic Mohawk Wig ($12.99 on Amazon). He won a gold medal for best head-cover (gold medal with ribbon, $1.49 at Party City).

Patrick’s iPhone, plugged in to our stereo, blasted a compilation of national anthems and theme songs from the Olympics that my husband had found on Amazon (Complete Music of the Olympics Games, $8.99). Our guests stood in groups flipping through books on Olympics past that I had placed around the room, such as The Treasures of the Olympic Winter Games ($35.26 on Amazon) and Igniting the Flame: America’s First Olympic Team ($19.23 on Amazon), which tells how a team of only 14 athletes brought back 11 gold medals from the first modern Olympiad in Greece, 1896.

Hanging from our chandelier were international flags (International Flag Hanging Swirl Decorations, $3.99 for a five-count at Party City).

Bouncing around our ceiling were Patriotic Star Balloons from Dollar Tree ($1 each).

Above the flat screen was draped a 23-foot-long banner of different flags of the countries of the world ($4.99 at Party City).

Over in the main party room, the flat screen blared the opening ceremony from Sochi. “Who picks the outfits for our American athletes to wear?” I groaned.

“Can anyone say, ‘patchwork quilt’?” answered friend Bernice.

“Maybe they’re going for, ‘It’s so bad it’s good,’” added Patrick.

“It’s so bad, it’s bad,” stated pal John, “which might be said about a lot of outfits,” he added, nodding at my Morph Man.

“It may be bad,” Morph Man said through the Spandex, “but I make it look good.”

With that, he danced and flexed in front of the TV screen until forced away by flying popcorn and a chorus of playful jeers. “You won’t be jeering when you taste my Olympic cocktails,” he said.

After 20 minutes of banging about in the kitchen, he emerged with a tray full of martini glasses. “I give you the Triple Twist Wipeout,” he proclaimed, “named after all the wipeouts in the ice-skating competition, and for what it will do to you if you’re not careful. It’s three shots of vodka; three types of juice — cranberry, orange, and grapefruit — and a twist of lemon.”

“Let the wipeouts commence,” jested John.

“Russian vodka would have been more appropriate for this Olympics,” Patrick said as he handed out the deadly drinks. “But we find the best buy on vodka is Monopolowa at Trader Joe’s [$9.99 for one liter]. But it’s from Austria, which is always a big player in the Winter Olympics.”

Among the plates of internationally flagged ($1.99 for a 50-count at Party City) hors d’oeuvres sat a creation of mine that I named “The Flying Tomato” after San Diego’s own Olympic hero, Shaun White. I made mini caprese salads — mozzarella chunk, basil leaf, cherry tomato — mounted kebab-like on gold-medal toothpicks I found at Pickonus.com (100-count, gold disk–tipped, 4 3/4-inch toothpicks, $5). They were a hit.

As the Olympic flag was hoisted, we watched and critiqued, ate, and played a drinking game. At every mention of the phrase “medal count” from the broadcast, everyone took a swig.

“Team USA has a record number of athletes at Sochi,” said friend Jan. “Biggest delegation ever with 230 athletes.”

“Should make for a high medal count,” laughed a nearly wiped out Morph Man.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all

Previous article

In brilliant capstone to its declarations on racism and vaccine misinformation, Board of Supervisors declares “the twisted darkness that lurks in the depths of every human heart” a public health crisi

Supernatural Supervisors
Next Article

Triangle-shaped in Solana Beach

The “manicured grounds” add a pop of color to an exterior that’s otherwise black, white

The invitations went out through Facebook. They included a photo of my man in a morphsuit: full-body stretchy spandex, red and white stripes over the face, stars down the right arm, the American flag. This patriotic fellow was holding a sign that read, “Go for the Gold. Opening Ceremonies party at the Kelly House.”

On the night of the Olympic Games Party at the Kelly house, hubby Patrick donned the stretchy suit and greeted our guests, whose reactions ranged from stunned silence to high fives and cries of “Epic!” (USA Flag Morphsuit, $33.26 for a large on Amazon).

I channeled the first Olympiad and put on a cream Grecian gown and a gold laurel wreath (California Costumes’ Olympic Goddess costume, $27.34 on Amazon). Work pal James showed up in a USA flag beanie ($10.84 on Amazon) and socks in red, white, and blue (Stance brand’s the Fourth Sock, $12.99 for a large pair on Amazon). Dan arrived in his Patriotic Mohawk Wig ($12.99 on Amazon). He won a gold medal for best head-cover (gold medal with ribbon, $1.49 at Party City).

Patrick’s iPhone, plugged in to our stereo, blasted a compilation of national anthems and theme songs from the Olympics that my husband had found on Amazon (Complete Music of the Olympics Games, $8.99). Our guests stood in groups flipping through books on Olympics past that I had placed around the room, such as The Treasures of the Olympic Winter Games ($35.26 on Amazon) and Igniting the Flame: America’s First Olympic Team ($19.23 on Amazon), which tells how a team of only 14 athletes brought back 11 gold medals from the first modern Olympiad in Greece, 1896.

Hanging from our chandelier were international flags (International Flag Hanging Swirl Decorations, $3.99 for a five-count at Party City).

Bouncing around our ceiling were Patriotic Star Balloons from Dollar Tree ($1 each).

Above the flat screen was draped a 23-foot-long banner of different flags of the countries of the world ($4.99 at Party City).

Over in the main party room, the flat screen blared the opening ceremony from Sochi. “Who picks the outfits for our American athletes to wear?” I groaned.

“Can anyone say, ‘patchwork quilt’?” answered friend Bernice.

“Maybe they’re going for, ‘It’s so bad it’s good,’” added Patrick.

“It’s so bad, it’s bad,” stated pal John, “which might be said about a lot of outfits,” he added, nodding at my Morph Man.

“It may be bad,” Morph Man said through the Spandex, “but I make it look good.”

With that, he danced and flexed in front of the TV screen until forced away by flying popcorn and a chorus of playful jeers. “You won’t be jeering when you taste my Olympic cocktails,” he said.

After 20 minutes of banging about in the kitchen, he emerged with a tray full of martini glasses. “I give you the Triple Twist Wipeout,” he proclaimed, “named after all the wipeouts in the ice-skating competition, and for what it will do to you if you’re not careful. It’s three shots of vodka; three types of juice — cranberry, orange, and grapefruit — and a twist of lemon.”

“Let the wipeouts commence,” jested John.

“Russian vodka would have been more appropriate for this Olympics,” Patrick said as he handed out the deadly drinks. “But we find the best buy on vodka is Monopolowa at Trader Joe’s [$9.99 for one liter]. But it’s from Austria, which is always a big player in the Winter Olympics.”

Among the plates of internationally flagged ($1.99 for a 50-count at Party City) hors d’oeuvres sat a creation of mine that I named “The Flying Tomato” after San Diego’s own Olympic hero, Shaun White. I made mini caprese salads — mozzarella chunk, basil leaf, cherry tomato — mounted kebab-like on gold-medal toothpicks I found at Pickonus.com (100-count, gold disk–tipped, 4 3/4-inch toothpicks, $5). They were a hit.

As the Olympic flag was hoisted, we watched and critiqued, ate, and played a drinking game. At every mention of the phrase “medal count” from the broadcast, everyone took a swig.

“Team USA has a record number of athletes at Sochi,” said friend Jan. “Biggest delegation ever with 230 athletes.”

“Should make for a high medal count,” laughed a nearly wiped out Morph Man.

Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Mikkeller Global taps San Diego as the site for its 15-year anniversary celebration

20 breweries, 70 brews at Mikkeller's 15th anniversary
Next Article

Roy Campbell: friends and supporters from George Orwell to Dylan Thomas to J.R.R. Tolkien

Critics such as Joseph Pearce, Roger Scruton and Jorge Luis Borges have sought to resuscitate his reputation
Comments
0

Be the first to leave a comment.

Sign in to comment

Sign in

Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town Letters — Our inbox [email protected] — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close