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Over the phone, Maureen Slater sounds like a soccer mom. She uses words like “jammies” instead of pajamas and laughs at her own jokes (“I’m smarter than my husband, ha-ha-ha”), some of which aren’t really jokes (“but seriously, he’d tell you the same thing”). She lifts weights two or three times per week on a home gym set up on the patio of her Paradise Hills home. Her hands are large and strong-looking, the nails cut to the quick, and she wears one thin band of diamonds at the first knuckle of her index finger. But few people will ever see her hands.

The most the general public will see of Maureen is the amber brown of her eyes and the smudge of liner she wears beneath her lower lashes. The rest remains covered — hands, feet, face, hair, all of her — when she shops for groceries, picks up her children from school, travels to and from work, or during any of her other daily activities outside the home.

Typically, Maureen wears a black, ankle-length, robelike covering called an abaya (in conversation, she refers to it as a “coat”), a black hijab (which covers her head and hair, her shoulders, and everything else down to her knees), and a niqab (a veil) over her face, leaving only a slit for her eyes. On her hands, she wears black gloves, and on her feet, a pair of cowboy boots or Doc Martens.

At our first meeting, however, Maureen is between hospice patients, and so she’s “dressed down” in a white knee-length tunic and matching pants, a bright-green scarf covering her head and hair, and a black veil covering her face. Her hands are bare, exposing the ring, the short nails, and her white skin. She leans forward, into my personal space, firmly grasps my hand in hers, and shakes.

Hidden though she is in what she calls her “private little room,” Maureen is candid and outspoken, the antithesis of what many assume of Muslim women, whether they choose to wear a face veil or not.

The 46-year-old mother of five converted to Islam from Catholicism 27 years ago — under her own conditions. “I was still going to wear makeup and wear bikinis and go to the beach and have a beer occasionally,” she says.

By the time she converted, she’d been married to her Egyptian Muslim husband for six months. He agreed to her conditions, saying that once she took the Shahada (the oath declaring belief in the oneness of Allah and the acceptance of Muhammad as God’s prophet), he trusted God to guide her if it was His will that she conduct herself differently.

Every step she’s since taken, graduating over the years from the masar (which covers the hair but leaves the neck exposed) to the hijab, and, finally, to the niqab (each step covering more of herself in public), has been her own choice. Although she’d once sworn she would “never, ever” wear the niqab, Maureen says the first time she wore one out in public “was like being on the computer and doing some work at home while you’re in your jammies.”

∗ ∗ ∗

“Say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what must ordinarily appear thereof.” (Qur’an 24.31)

Some Islamic scholars teach that the face veil is mandatory, while others believe that a woman covering even her hair is a personal choice, but all agree that modesty is an important part of the Islamic faith.

On the website IslamForToday.com, Syed Rahman published an article titled “Seven Conditions for Women’s Dress in Islam.” Women’s clothing, he writes, must cover everything but the hands and the face; the material must not be transparent; it must hang loose to hide the shape of the wearer; the design must not resemble men’s clothing or that of nonbelieving women; it must not consist of bold designs; and it should not be worn for the sole purpose of increasing one’s status or reputation.

My friend Ifrah explains Rahman’s “Seven Conditions” in her own words.

“You should wear something that’s not form-fitting and something that covers you up, so that when somebody looks at you, they can’t talk about your body shape or your beauty or what you lack or don’t lack.” The purpose, she says, “is for a woman to be judged on her abilities, her knowledge, her education, and her mind, not for how sexy she looks.”

To dress as such is to observe hijab. Not every Muslim woman interprets this modesty in the same way. In City Heights (home to many Muslims), some women wear black, brown, or dark-green solids, their long, shapeless head-to-toe coverings reminiscent of a nun’s habit. Others wear bright colors and patterns, kitten heels visible beneath their long skirts, topped off with gauzy scarves and giant, trendy sunglasses, all of it giving them a look somewhere between Erykah Badu and Audrey Hepburn.

For those born into Islam, most begin with a small, child-sized hijab between the ages of five and nine.

Dumb Questions, Mean Friends, and Transformers

A Tuesday morning in June, less than a week left to go in the school year. A fourth-grade classroom at Oak Park Elementary buzzes with a restlessness not typical of independent reading time. Whispers rise to a hum, and the teacher calls out from the back of the classroom, “I like the way Amal is reading quietly.”

Amal, a creamy brown-skinned girl in a black-and-gray hijab set with silver sequins, smiles behind her book. The rest of the class quiets down. When the teacher turns her attention to the reading group she is facilitating at the back of the class, Amal and the girl whose desk faces hers begin to kick each other under the table and giggle quietly behind the books still propped up in front of them.

Ten minutes later, the children line up for recess. Outside, some run to jump rope or to join four-square games already in progress. Amal and several other girls crowd around the backpacks, where one classmate is passing out Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.

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MsGrant Sept. 8, 2010 @ 6:28 p.m.

You reduce this to female competition. Shame on you. And I do realize that this was the point of your story. To show that women dress for women. To use the hijab as you weapon of choice is conceited and shallow and EASY. You want to get stared at? Try something less exposing. Hubba hubba my ass.


David Dodd Sept. 8, 2010 @ 6:54 p.m.

It's silly. Muslim women that conform to the hijab will ensure that they only marry men who seek visual beauty over internal beauty. Those bastards only want to get inside of your veil ;)


MsGrant Sept. 8, 2010 @ 7:26 p.m.

Exactly. The cheapest form of erotica is the disguising of it as a form of it.


aquarimary Sept. 9, 2010 @ 8:56 a.m.

Looks like tiger woods in the picture!


MuppyCat Sept. 10, 2010 @ 3:04 p.m.

Having spent some time in the MiddleEast, I asked a number of Arab women if they resented wearing the Hijab. Their reply? A hardy laugh followed by this answer "Why should we resent it? Look at our sun. Because of the hijab, our skin is flawless, beautiful. Why should we want to have wrinkly skin like you American women?" They also pointed out that their "husbands can take a second, third or fourth wife, so it is important to stay lovely for as long as possible."


SurfPuppy619 Sept. 10, 2010 @ 4:34 p.m.

They also pointed out that their "husbands can take a second, third or fourth wife, so it is important to stay lovely for as long as possible

Now that is a plan I could get behind!


nan shartel Sept. 10, 2010 @ 4:39 p.m.

addendum to #6

i don't consider it foreign dress but cultural and religious dress so i would have no right to judge it in any way...it does make the curious take notice... as far as i'm concerned it's singularly unattractive and i would think uncomfortable as well

so many of the rituals of dress and behavior of middle eastern women seem suppressive to me...meant not always to protect but to envelope their bodies as well as their minds in a kind of hidden state that makes them unapproachable and therefore always separate and unable to assimilate into a new culture

perhaps that's what is meant to occur...that separateness even tho these women live here in America...it saddened me somehow


Founder Sept. 10, 2010 @ 5:40 p.m.

I'll side with MSG on this issue!

If I was a female (I'm not), then I'd be worried that sooner, rather than later, more women World-Wide will be "urged" to conform as more and more men decide that women should again, be hidden away, especially as the job market gets much tighter...

Any woman that does not want to show any part of their body is OK by me but to be required or allowed to "hide" from the outside "public" World (by being completely covered) is a security issue that should not be allowed... Do what you wish in your own home, but in public be visible like everyone else. + I would not want veiled people driving and think that anyone driving should be required to not wear any "headgear" that limits their peripheral vision...


Founder Sept. 10, 2010 @ 5:44 p.m.

Reply #6 "to each his/her own...."

At least right now here; but I would not advise traveling to many Countries that just a few years ago, women could do so freely.

As Bob Dylan sang, "The Times They Are a-Changin' "...


Founder Sept. 10, 2010 @ 5:46 p.m.

Reply #7 "Now that is a plan I could get behind!" SP, You old Dawg...


nan shartel Sept. 11, 2010 @ 9:31 a.m.


yah founder that off and on a plane would be a mess... definite search in order when the person is clothed in what some would view as a tent


Founder Sept. 11, 2010 @ 11:22 a.m.

Reply #12 Expect to see lots at Halloween...


MuppyCat Sept. 11, 2010 @ 1:27 p.m.

Let me point out that here in the West, we are also required to "cover up". It too is rooted in religious beliefs. Why else did our Americans missionaries insist that the Hawaiians cover their bodies? And, if today the citizens of those beautiful islands chose to return to walking around bare breasted and surfing nude, would we allow it?I think not. As for equal rights...please, how many women here, receive the same amount of money for the same amount of work. Be it Muslim or Christian, we women are still struggling for equal rights. Note to Elizabeth Salaam. Thanks for a wonderful story, it was so insightful.


nan shartel Sept. 11, 2010 @ 2:15 p.m.

muppycat...don't get ur panties in a twist gurl...here at the READER we have equal rights to all to give our opinions of the writing and the content of the piece

it is an educating blog...no judgments can be given...equal pay and bikinis have nothing to do with it


MuppyCat Sept. 12, 2010 @ 1:57 a.m.

"Equal pay and bikinis have nothing to do with it" sounds like a judgment to me. One I respectfully disagree with. But my point was that different cultures come from different histories, and mostly, Middle Eastern, Asian and African countries have been on the receiving end of our wealth-backed values, whether it's short skirts or the consumer society's excesses. Maybe it's time we looked to them with respect to see what we can learn, rather than assuming we have all the answers. I learned a lot from Ms. Salaam's excellent story.


David Dodd Sept. 12, 2010 @ 4:56 a.m.

"Maybe it's time we looked to them with respect to see what we can learn, rather than assuming we have all the answers."

France has banned the wearing of the hijab in their country. What the French have said is that this is not out of disrespect toward Middle-Eastern countries, but more out of respect for France and French culture. Should French culture offend the just-under 10% Muslim population in France, the French recommend that the Muslim population repatriate at their convenience.

I do not find this as a judgement, I find it as a reality that many Americans are afraid to broach.


David Dodd Sept. 12, 2010 @ 5:21 a.m.

"..receiving end of our wealth-backed values..."

Actually, I have noticed that none of those places have offered to return the billions of dollars in aid from the U.S. You could leave off "-based values" and be equally as accurate.


Founder Sept. 12, 2010 @ 7:56 a.m.

I believe that the USA will follow the French rather than cave in like the British!

Can you imagine some group starting a religion where folks "must" wear giant "hoop" skirts or "bio-garb" type outfits because it "insulates" them and then they demand that everyone redesign everything to accept them in their own expanded personal space?

Public Safety for all, trumps individual freedom in public!

I think it is ironic that the religious garb from the Middle East has also been used to "hide" by the very folks that terrorize the public.

Do what you wish in your own home, but don't expect the Public to adopt or approve of your dress code in Public; especially if it allows you to hide your identity!


Dadler Sept. 12, 2010 @ 12:16 p.m.

This story, sadly, never seemed to get below the surface. I am amazed the writer did not ask the most simple, obvious question to the women she spent time with: "How do you feel about following ancient religious rules that were written entirely by men, for the benifit of men, and to ensure that women are treated as less than human?" Also, full covering one's face, or even partially, robs you of your most human trait, expressiveness. Why women willingly keep themselves in servitude like this is fairly clear: fear.


MsGrant Sept. 12, 2010 @ 2:31 p.m.

I just thought it was in kind of poor taste to fetishize something that most American women find more than a little frightening, if they really thought about it.

Surfpup, four wives would kill you.


David Dodd Sept. 12, 2010 @ 3:27 p.m.

"How do you feel about following ancient religious rules that were written entirely by men, for the benifit of men, and to ensure that women are treated as less than human?"

Actually, the hijab and veil and so on were tribal traditions. The Quran only recommends modesty, that women keep their bodies covered in public so as not to be harassed. It uses a word that translates to "veil" for covering the breats, and a word that translates to "cloak" in another passage. No where in the Quran does it order that women keep their faces covered in public.

Taken in the context it was written in the Quran, it appears as a message that women should avoid being harassed or ridiculed in public by the way they dress. There is a similar passage concerning men. Then, in many countries, wearing the hijab would certainly accomplish that mission because so many women dress in that manner. However, in the United States, the wearing of a hijab would have the exact opposite intent of any religious pretext it is meant to enforce.


MsGrant Sept. 12, 2010 @ 4:01 p.m.

"If I was a female (I'm not), then I'd be worried that sooner, rather than later, more women World-Wide will be "urged" to conform as more and more men decide that women should again, be hidden away, especially as the job market gets much tighter..."

Founder, it ain't gonna happen. There is no way that women in the world-wide work-force are just going to throw up their hands and say "gee, the men are deciding for us that we should all be unemployed and wearing burqas, so I guess I'm in". What are they going to do? Declare war on women? Wishful thinking on some parts, but women are only gaining power, not losing it. It's a constant struggle, but one that will eventually be won. I am not the least bit worried.


MsGrant Sept. 12, 2010 @ 4:09 p.m.

Refried, its original intent may have been somewhat benign, but as women began to get educations, own property, etc., it was perverted to satisfy threatened males and continues to be so to this day. If I lived in a society that had the authority to throw acid in my face if I left the house in a state not appropriate according to my male relatives, I would arm myself.


David Dodd Sept. 12, 2010 @ 6:15 p.m.

I can't believe my "breasts" typo. You're sort of making my point, Ms. Grant. In other words, it seems to have become a perversion, especially in the West. One comment hinted that it was a religious thing, and even the story comments thusly:

"Say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what must ordinarily appear thereof." (Qur’an 24.31)

Now let's make it more contextual, and examine the verse before it:

"Say to the believing man that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that will make for greater purity for them; and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do." (Qur’an 24.30)

And while we're at it, let's not leave out the tail-end of verse 24.31 which does not end with "thereof":

"; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands..."

Basically, it is instructing men not to be perverts and women not to provoke such behavior and to save their "beauty" (which is ambiguous in context) for their husbands.

In another verse, this is mentioned:

"Those who harass believing men and believing women undeservedly, bear (on themselves) a calumny and a grievous sin. O Prophet! Enjoin your wives, your daughters, and the wives of true believers that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad). That is most convenient, that they be distinguished and not be harassed..." (Qur’an 33.58-59)

Basically, it is instructing Muslims to wear clothing that will not subject themselves to harassment by non-believers. There's one more passage that reads similar to the first that uses the word "cape" but I can't find it at the moment. Anyway, that's the idea.


MuppyCat Sept. 13, 2010 @ 2:45 a.m.

Here's a bit of info inspired by Mrs. Salaam's story and refriedgringo's interesting additions.

The tradition of veiling and seclusion (known together as hijab) was introduced into Arabia long before Muhammad, primarily through Arab contacts with Syria and Iran ,where the hijab was a sign of social status. Only a woman who need not work in the fields could afford to remain secluded and veiled.

There was no tradition of veiling until around 627 C.E., when the so-called “verse of hijab” suddenly descended upon the community. That verse, however, was addressed not to women in general, but exclusively to Muhammad’s many wives: “Believers, do not enter the Prophet’s house…unless asked. And if you are invited…do not linger. And when you ask something from the Prophet’s wives, do so from behind a hijab. This will assure the purity of your hearts as well as theirs” When Muhammad become the supreme leader of an increasingly expanding community, some kind of segregation had to be enforced to maintain the inviolability of his wives. For this reason, during the Prophet’s lifetime, no other women observed hijab.

No one knows for sure when the veil was adopted after the Prophet's death, but most Muslim women began wearing it as a way to emulate the Prophet’s wives, who were revered as “the Mothers of the Ummah.” And the veil was not compulsory until a large body of male scriptural and legal scholars began using their religious and political authority to regain the dominance they had lost in society as a result of the Prophet’s egalitarian reforms.


David Dodd Sept. 13, 2010 @ 4:15 a.m.

Muppy (and really, anyone), another interesting read concerning the hijab and Muslim tradition in general and what is perceived as Western culture's attempt to ban it, can be uncovered in the Turkish revolution. It was one of the steps that Mustafa Atatürk took in order to attempt to seperate a system of Islamic judiciary rule in order to promote a secular Turkey. Obviously, he encountered much difficulty with this attempt, as Muslim chieftains enjoyed great autonomy and influence and wealth and, well, many wives under the Caliphate.

Atatürk eventually managed to abolish the Caliphate in Turkey but the sons and grandsons of the chieftains and their tribal influences in Turkey remain to this day.


MsGrant Sept. 13, 2010 @ 8:20 a.m.

Thanks, refried and muppy. It really is an interesting subject. I can understand how it became symbolic of status, and even as a fashion statement (most Muslim women began wearing it as a way to emulate the Prophet’s wives), and also as a protective device to ward against the unwanted attention of non-believers. I am still left questioning its value in today's world. I'll go back and re-read the article with a more open mind.


nan shartel Sept. 13, 2010 @ 1:52 p.m.

16...Muppycat u brought up equal pay and bikinis...not me...i said no religious or cultural judgements

ur intentions here seem to be to do battle with the opinions of others who don't agree with yours...which is a shame because u r derailing the comments into the "tit for tat" area out of the shades of grey into black or white only


David Dodd Sept. 13, 2010 @ 2:23 p.m.

"I am still left questioning its value in today's world."

I think it has negative value in parts of the world where the vast majority do not wear such clothing. And I certainly don't think it's unfair to consider that in parts of the world where the vast majority wear such clothing that this is mandated by forces wishing to control society.


MuppyCat Sept. 13, 2010 @ 3 p.m.

Nan, I thought we were having a discussion. Isn't that what sharing opinions is all about? Thesis, antithesis, synthesis. Mrs. Salaam wrote a fascinating story, stimulating discussion and comments from the READER's readers. Let's just enjoy the to and fro.


kimberlyshae Sept. 14, 2010 @ 10:58 a.m.

everyone that is an American citizen should go out and learn the history and the current social issues in these middle eastern Countries. These women go though old 12th century torture. Truely sad.

I dont mind some of these head dresses but i do have a problem when some women say that they will not take if off for drivers license pics and etc. To me it is a matter of safety.
If a women walks in a store and is wearing something that covers her face isnt it just like a bank robber that would wear a mask.? So i see it as a security issue.


nan shartel Sept. 14, 2010 @ 11:29 a.m.

except for this statement by u Muppy..."Equal pay and bikinis have nothing to do with it SOUNDS LIKE A JUDGMENT TO ME"....i agree with #32

let's exchange cultural and intellectual input

actually i see issues only with the HIJIB...i see no difficulties with the head covering and veil...as the veil can be easily lowered for important reasons

i have Muslim friends and have spent vacations with them in Turkey in the past...love it and got on well there...so i have more then just an ordinary Western attitude toward Muslim female dress


nan shartel Sept. 14, 2010 @ noon


i'll ride shotgun for ya Grantie!!!


Founder Sept. 14, 2010 @ 1:17 p.m.

Reply RE: 34 & 24

Right On, I suggest all women be VERY careful going to the Middle East, especially if they are traveling alone!

BTW: There are many stories of American (and women from other Countries) that have "visited" the Middle Eastern home land of their new husbands and never were allowed to leave...

Religious Freedom is one thing, Religious Doctrine is quite another!


MuppyCat Sept. 14, 2010 @ 2:55 p.m.

Founder is spot on re travel and religious doctrine. However, if a woman must travel alone into a conservative Arab country, then wear a pashima or wide & long silk scarf. It's the only answer, as for clothes like bathing suits (Nan, no where in my texts did I write "bikinis")two piece ones should be left at home. Adding on to Founder's info, watch the film CAIRO TIME starring Patricia Clarkson. Gives you a clear idea what a woman might expect if visiting a more liberal country like Egypt or Qatar.


Rocket_J_Squirrel Sept. 15, 2010 @ 10:09 a.m.

Female repression in the name of Mohammad. Wonderful. Going to the beach must be fun while their male companions run around in marble bag swimsuits and strut their stuff. You can tell how bad certain religions are by how badly they repress their females. Islam definitely pegs the "Suck-o-meter".

I guess bikinis with drawings of Mohammad would be a definite fashion no-no, and would probably result in beheading.....


SurfPuppy619 Sept. 15, 2010 @ 11:39 a.m.

Adding on to Founder's info, watch the film CAIRO TIME starring Patricia Clarkson

I would watch ANYTHING with Patricia Clarkson!


David Dodd Sept. 15, 2010 @ 4:22 p.m.

So that our terms are straight, clothing-wise:

Hijab - A term generally used to describe a Muslim's modest attire. Hijab is specifically used to describe the portion of dress for women that covers the head, and the face if applicable.

Chador - A cloak for women worn from head to toe that is open in front. Popular in Iran.

Abaya - Like a chador, only closed in front and is often worn with a type of face veil.

Niqab - A face veil for women with a slit to expose only the eyes. The slit may optionally be closed.

Burqa - A face veil like the niqab but does not expose any part of the face. Mesh is in the eye area to permit vision.

Thobe - A robe, usually white, for men. Appears taylored from the neck down the sleeves and is loose to the ankles.

Ghutra - A head scarf for men, it is usually white and sometimes black & white or red & white checkered, generally tied on with a black rope band.

Bisht - A dress robe for men which is worn over the thobe, which is used by dignitaries.


Founder Sept. 16, 2010 @ 10:02 a.m.

He was wearing a bright white Thobe under his Bisht, with a red & white checkered Ghutra as he discussed what he considered appropriate dress for one his wive's, when she was allowed outside the home. For some reason, he was not happy with her Chador/Hijab combination or perhaps it was because she was wearing the Burqa instead of the Abaya; but who knows what she really thought, because sadly, her response was hidden from all.


Rocket_J_Squirrel Sept. 16, 2010 @ 9:26 p.m.

Whether it be hijabs,

or hoodies, PLEASE don't hide your

feminine goodies!!!


bobwms Sept. 21, 2010 @ 1:53 p.m.

I think that anybody who even thinks that there is a beautiful face hiding behind that veil would probably also fall for the Nigerian 419 Scan. That is why the martyrs get 72 virgins. Out of 72, you might find one you can look at without the veil. Maybe not.


nan shartel Sept. 21, 2010 @ 2:18 p.m.

this is so strange...i was at hospital yesterday in the Emergency Room and saw two woman with veils...someone asked me what i thought of it and i just answered that in this country covered faces have nearly always signified some kind of criminal activity would be soon occurring

"like the hold up guys covering their faces with kerchiefs"

i guess our culture has been indoctrinated for years with that picture of "badness is about to happen"...it's an instant knee jerk reaction

it has nothing to do with religious or cultural discrimination

and it's difficult to overcome


RainboBright Oct. 5, 2010 @ 11:04 a.m.

As a muslim-American, I find this string rather interesting.. I did not know much about Islam as I grew up in a Methodist (and Lutheran) household and chose Taoism and went to a Quaker school, so I used to know nothing of the women "behind the veil". Now, I choose to cover my hair - but not my face - and little old ladies are scared of me at the bus stop!

Egad. Did I really change so much? Is my surfer-girl accent or outgoing personality not coming accross in my bright blue 'cover' or jean skirt? Well I am sorry if this country based on freedom (of religion - hello!) says that I should not dress how I want - if there is a safety concern, then I go through the same process as everyone else. You can pat me down (carefully) or walk me through a metal-detector - if you are scared of me still, then someone is winning; not you, not me.

Virtue is bold, and goodness never fearful. - William Shakespeare, 1564 - 1616


politicky Nov. 4, 2010 @ 2:50 p.m.

I could care less about everything except the niqab. That is a security issue and wearing it should not be legal in this country.


Tallsharon Nov. 13, 2011 @ 9:25 a.m.

try walking around in Egypt, turkey, morocco , the Arab Muslim part of the globe. it's bloody hot, sunburnt heads, men and women in long robes with head scarves or pieces, Easter day in alexandria families at the beach, strolling along the boardwalk, young people in traditional dress holding hands sitting on the sea wall. my friends dress for the occasion- also wear traditional dress, I actually see it as charming sorry. passing judgement on other cultures using western values is like someone hiring me to build their house, I don't believe for a second I have the right to tell anyone, anywhere how to believe, how to dress, how to think. I always try very hard not to shoot my mouth off about things that I really have no knowledge of, particularly sine I'm a traveler and the reason I love travel embraces and is fascinated by the unique features of different cultures. it's bad enough seeing McDonald's in every country - I say if you haven't lived it, seen it, touched it, then get on with your life.


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