Scott Marks 12:30 p.m., July 26
Faster than a dozen chickens looking to fly the coop! More powerful than a fist halting a whirling lawnmower blade! Able to bend sharp fork tines with a single chomp! Yes, it's the work of Directorman (David Yarovesky), strange appropriator of intellectual property who, along with screenwriters Brian Gunn and Matt Gunn (Journey 2: The Mysterious Island), arrived in Hollywood with powers and abilities to plagiarize far beyond those of moral men. One variation: their Superboy (Jackson A. Dunn) flip-flops the legend by putting his powers to bad use, savaging his designated Ma and Pa Kent surrogates (Elizabeth Banks and David Denman). Oh, that this were a tale of a scorned child seeking revenge against parents who covered up his adoption, anything but another excuse for gore. To call it a never-ending battle to stay awake would be untrue; jump-scares at five minute intervals saw to that. 2018.