Stories for March 2005

Thursday, March 31

Why Do They Die?

Does publicity cause suicide?

ON THE MORNING OF AUGUST 4, 1963, the front page of the New York Times carried the headline "Dr. Ward Is Dead; Suicide Note Calls His Foes Vultures." The story revealed that the 50-year-old Ward, ...

Who Are These Guys?

How nice it is, nowadays, to come upon a film directed by someone with whom you go back a ways, and feel some familiarity. Someone for whom you even feel, or have felt, some friendship. ...

Symbol Hunt

“The berries were really tight and really small, and the seeds were completely brown.”

Swimming with Scapulars

Swimming With Scapulars: True Confessions Of A Young Catholic. Loyola Press; 2005; 256 pages; $19.95. FROM THE DUST JACKET: In Lickona's "true confessions," we are introduced to a unique and singular voice, but one that ...

Live from Marin County, California

Fate is cruel. I think we can all agree on this one thing before I move on. Mostly cruel. Especially when one considers withering illnesses, rapid aging, death and taxes -- all of which are ...

Back When

Thirty Years Ago The taxpayers of San Diego pay Mayor Pete Wilson the middlin' wage of $20,000 a year. Some say we get a lot for our money. Everybody would agree on one bargain, though: ...

War and Peace

The night after attending a party, I was invited to another party hosted by Mike, one of the DJs. It was at a house in the Del Cerro area near SDSU. Mike lives at this ...

Safe Grind

'Funky, fresh, dressed to impress, ready to party!" For Samantha Duenas, third-year student at UCSD and member of the dance troupe Second 2 None, Missy Elliot lyrics are inspiring. "It sums it up with her," ...

Acapulco Nights

Tesoro (teh-SOH-row), Spanish for "treasure," is a family operation run by the brother-and-sister team of Rosie and Ricardo Vera, with help from their parents and siblings. Open since November, it quickly gained a reputation as ...

Discover a showery 20-foot cascade in Coal Canyon, Orange County's premier wildlife corridor.

For at least three decades, the Coal Canyon diamond interchange on the Riverside Freeway through Santa Ana Canyon was a virtual joke, featuring ramps to and from nowhere. "Nowhere" might have been replaced by subdivisions ...

It’s All Happening at the Zoo

Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings. -- Evan Esar 'I dreamt about him again last night," Jenny said during a lull in our fragmented conversation. "Yeah? What happened?" I asked, ...

The Reader's Eye on Television

I KNOCKED ON THE DOOR. There were people inside, but nobody got up to answer. I checked my notebook: 52 Romford Road, London, England. I was on the right street at the right house, but ...

What Promises to Be the Biggest Local Concert of the Year Happens Tomorrow

What promises to be the biggest local concert of the year happens tomorrow, and chances are, you won't see it. Kiss, Ted Nugent, Godsmack, Destiny's Child, and Cedric the Entertainer are appearing for some 35,000 ...

Singer Steve "Crabby" Cabler Was the Only American (Out of Eight) Who Survived

Singer Steve "Crabby" Cabler was the only American (out of eight) who survived after a terrorist bomb exploded in a Bali nightclub while he was on a surf vacation in October 2002. It took 180 ...

"Our [Ticketmaster] Contract is Up, and We Haven't Renewed."

"Our [Ticketmaster] contract is up, and we haven't renewed." 'Canes owner Eric Leitstein is in the process of deciding whether to continue his involvement with the monolithic ticket company. In the running to replace Ticketmaster ...

On March 22, Members of Louis XIV

On March 22, members of Louis XIV appeared on the radio show Loveline (which airs locally on 91X from 10 p.m. to midnight). Only one person called in the entire two-hour period to ask Jason ...

Liberal Bastion

“We called it quits about 18 months ago. Reopened as this pub…with a serious attitude toward beers.”

Brian Karscig

Brian Karscig of Louis XIV credits local radio with breaking "Finding Out True Love Is Blind," the self-released single that led to the band's Atlantic Records debut album last week. He told livedaily.com, "91X in ...

"Are these movies pirated?"

"Are these movies pirated?" asked Officer K. Wadhams. "They are copies," suspect Tommy Grant conceded. In SDPD crime report #05-016812 filed on March 18, Wadhams was on routine patrol and noticed a group of males ...

Last Week 4th & B General Manager Ray Johnson Confirmed Rumors

Last week 4th & B general manager Ray Johnson confirmed rumors that he and owner Ali Nilforshan were likely to turn over the booking of the 1500-seat downtown nightclub to either House of Blues or ...

The Only Theater-Friendly Mayor

"The only theater-friendly mayor this town has had was Maureen O'Connor," said Tom Hall of the San Diego Foundation. "She wasn't known for her arts and culture appreciation, but she understood the politics of it." ...

Window Boxes for Plants

Mom's birthday is on the horizon, and I'm thinking window boxes. For as long as I can remember, she's always kept a vibrant perennial garden full of snapdragons, salvia, and alyssum at the foot of ...

San Diego Citadel Corps

"People are depraved and are slaves to sin. God can forgive us of that sin through Jesus' resurrection," said Major Warren Dabis when asked about the power of the resurrection of Jesus Christ. "We should ...

Midnight On The Beach

'Everybody I know, once in their life, has gone out to watch grunion run, but I don't recall anyone actually seeing grunion. What, exactly, is your connection to the beast?" I'm on the phone with ...

Hahahaha. Croak

Dear Matthew Alice: "I thought I would die laughing." When something makes you laugh so hard you can't breathe, is there a chance you'll never stop? Is this unhealthy? -- M., San Diego Well, A.M., ...

Stripped down

A Las Vegas TV station reported last week that Michael Galardi's father Jack has lost the liquor license at his Leopard's Lounge in Vegas, but authorities claim it has nothing to do with Michael's guilty ...

Secrecy Culture Continues

A letter that has fallen into the Reader's hands reveals that the City of San Diego will have to confess many more accounting sins once it gets new audits from outside firms poring over its ...

Thursday, March 24

Commitment

Verbal abuse is part of the job.

Robert Hernandez presides over a psychological war zone. At Donovan correctional facility, where Hernandez is warden, every move his officers make is watched by inmates; every word they say is overheard. "Nothing," said one officer, ...

Field of Seven

Movies reviewed this week: Dear Frankie, D.E.B.S., Downfall, Millions, The Ring Two, Schultze Gets the Blues, and The Upside of Anger

Slow Addict

“I took a big swig and thought, ‘This is nasty. I’m never drinking wine again.’”

Rachel Pink In Manhattan

Slice Of Paradise THURSDAY The last day of work looms and I'm glad to have a break. My nephew, that brilliant four-year-old ball of personality, is coming to stay overnight with just me and Chuck ...

Mad Mary Lamb: Lunacy and Murder in Literary London

Mad Mary Lamb: Lunacy and Murder in Literary London. W.W. Norton, 2005; 314 pages; $24.95. FROM THE DUST JACKET: Mary Lamb -- a dutiful daughter, well liked by just about everyone -- killed her own ...

Back When

Twenty-Five Years Ago There is a bulletin board, after a fashion, on the front door to Ashley's Market on Paseo Delicias, the main street in Rancho Santa Fe. Next to the five-by-seven-inch card advertising the ...

Bad As They Wanna Be

I got a call from Alisha Brophy, who told me about an art show party she was having. When she said it was for "bad art," I was really intrigued. She and her friends were ...

Digital Hometown

'My mom bought some property in Hemet and I went with her and I was like, 'Who the hell lives in Hemet?' I thought it was the weirdest little town in no-man's land. It looked ...

Ramble amid giant boulders and high-desert vegetation at Valley of the Moon in the Jacumba Mountains.

Strolling through the aptly named Valley of the Moon, you might think that a square-mile patch of Joshua Tree National Park has been magically transported there -- minus, of course, the famous Joshua trees. Ponderous ...

A Matter of Taste

Laurie got offended that I used the word puke. But to me, that's what her dinner tasted like. -- Jack Handy Last week, David received a package FedExed overnight from New York. Curious about a ...

When U2 Plays the Sports Arena

When U2 plays the Sports Arena on March 28, the venue will have a new name: the iPayOne Center -- a discount real estate brokerage in Carlsbad that has agreed to pay $2.5 million for ...

FM-94/9's Program Director Claims that 91X Has Cut the New York Band Interpol

FM-94/9's program director claims that 91X has cut the New York band Interpol from 91X's playlist. The reason? According to Garrett Michaels, it's because 91X was "upset that we were being allowed to simulcast their ...

The Morrison Hotel Gallery

The Morrison Hotel Gallery owes its name to a downtown L.A. hotel where Henry Diltz photographed what became the cover of the 1970 Doors album. Diltz's work anchors this new La Jolla gallery that offers ...

"I've Been Doing a Lot of Corporate Shows"

"I've been doing a lot of corporate shows," admitted original Bay City Rollers guitarist Ian Mitchell after the show March 12 in Rancho San Diego. They shared a bill with Steve Poltz, Private Domain, and ...

If the Chargers Hadn't Released 42-Year-Old Quarterback Doug Flutie

If the Chargers hadn't released 42-year-old quarterback Doug Flutie on March 11, they would have had to pay him a $300,000 bonus on March 15. Flutie was in Stowe, Vermont, for a family ski trip ...

"Edmond, the Son of Gloucester, Comes Onstage with an iPod"

"Edmond, the son of Gloucester, comes onstage with an iPod," says Stephanie Robinson, composer for the San Diego Repertory's production of King Lear. Robinson, a Ph.D. candidate in music composition at UCSD, has been working ...

Before the Robot Ate Me

Before the Robot Ate Me played San Francisco's Make-Out Room March 23, the San Francisco Bay Guardian proclaimed, "Those who thought intelligent music could never come out of a superficial city like San Diego will ...

Dane Scott, Lead Singer of Tubby

Dane Scott, lead singer of Tubby, got a rude surprise when he returned with his band at 5 a.m. on March 11 to the parking lot adjacent to the Mission Beach roller coaster. "There were ...

Jambase.com's "Head's Up" Column

Jambase.com's "Head's Up" column claims, "Louis XIV is quickly shaping up as 2005's first breakthrough rock 'n' roll success story.... 'Finding Out True Love Is Blind' is...currently the number two most requested at Los Angeles' ...

We are Ten Guys and a Girl

"We are ten guys and a girl, [all] under the age of 21, playing traditional swing," said keyboardist Dave Martina, a member of High Stakes Swing. "The only other band I know that plays swing ...

When Boyz II Men Play 4th & B Tonight

When Boyz II Men play 4th & B tonight, their contract requires all two dozen bath towels must be black. When U2 play the San Diego Sports Arena Monday, March 28, and Wednesday, March 30, ...

The Reader's Eye on Television

i REPRODUCE BY EXPELLING A CLOUD OF SPORES. Through the millions of years of evolution the lizard cortex of my brain recognizes patterns that indicate a situation of possible reproduction. Whenever colors and shapes align ...

Reveling at Reveles

After a couple of days at Harrah's in Valley Center, my partner and I grew bored with casino clamor and casino fare. At Fiore's, the hotel's top restaurant, our food-savvy waitress was a Valley Center ...

Mermaids and Invites Only

"I'd have the biggest, most rockin' music collection of any of your desert island castaways."

USD

"Almost everyone at USD already has some knowledge of Scripture and Jesus. So we can't go around saying 'Hey, you Catholics need to come to Christ.' Even though there are many Catholic students who have ...

Body Waxing

"Beauty hurts," was my husband Patrick's first response to the news that I was considering a bikini wax. My confidence boosted by a successful campaign to rid myself of 15 excess pounds, I was making ...

Baseball Takes The Pledge

Yes, news consumers have moved on. The televised congressional hearing produced 48 hours of press/video roar; it was a crossover story, headlined on the front page and sports page, but then it was back to ...

Genuine Dog

“Pete’s created a good feeling here. Employee of the year gets to go skydiving with him. Right, Pete?”

Mmmm�cow meat, pig meat�

Dear Matt: Why do we call cow meat "beef," pig meat "pork," but we call chicken and fish by their names? -- SG, the beach Let's see. Who can we blame this one on�the French? ...

To Hell and back

To Hell and back Everyone knows that Republicans are into faith-based initiatives, but what was a $5000 contribution from the Stickel Christian Foundation doing on the campaign-disclosure report of San Diego's Lincoln Club, that bastion ...

The Great Boston Molasses Flood

Matt: Did you ever hear of the Great Boston Molasses Flood, sometime back in the 1920s? Lots of people drowned in a nasty, sticky, slow death. Details, please. -- Tim, not in Boston Just my ...

The inedible olive

Matt: My girlfriend claims that black olives are harvested later than the green olives and that they're actually the ripe form of the olive. I say no. Settle the argument. -- Chris, the net Hate ...

Choppers Devour Millions

The value of helicopters in fighting fires is "the quick attack," says Brian Fennessy, manager of San Diego's Regional Fire and Rescue Helicopter Program. "If you can get a load of water and a crew ...

He Isn't Worth $9 an Hour

Consultant celebrities are like Hollywood celebrities: they're hired more for show than substance. This is just one of many reasons San Diego taxpayers should cock an eyebrow at the city's hiring of two former top ...

Thursday, March 17

Death Traps

Hundreds of buildings pose earthquake risks.

The City of San Diego has a website (www.sannet.gov/development-services/industry/pdf/urmpn.pdf) that contains a list of 706 local buildings supposedly built out of unreinforced masonry -- that is, bricks held in place with mortar but not tied ...

Kiddie Corner

Movies reviewed this week: Machuca, Robots, and Steamboy

Late Discovery

“It’s a very young industry here, and there are a lot of inconsistencies.”

Rachel Pink in Manhattan

WEDNESDAY In a desperate search for Febreze I headed to the Astor Place Kmart. I try to visit my not-at-all-friendly Manhattan Kmart on a quarterly basis. Something about visiting a chain store makes me guilty. ...

And the Candy Bar Goes to...

I can never go to more than one party when the Oscars are on. It would be my luck that while driving to the second one, I'd miss a famous moment like the streaker who ...

Wrong About Japan: A Father's Journey with His Son

Wrong About Japan: A Father's Journey with His Son. Alfred A. Knopf, 2005; 158 pages; $17.95. FROM THE DUST JACKET: The recipient of two Booker Prizes, Peter Carey expands his extraordinary achievement with each new ...

Back When

Thirty Years Ago I saw the miracle today, the one at the Israelite Church of God in Christ on 32nd and L Street.... When the newscasters explained that the miracle on 32nd Street, the image ...

Cash Is King

'If you see a Camaro convertible, there's more than likely a blonde driving it. For some reason, the ladies like Camaros," says Ray Taylor, who founded San Diego Auto Swap (also known as Ray Taylor's ...

There Were People Who Camped Out Here the Night Before

"There were people who camped out here the night before to buy the wristband and new CD." Toby Demain, who works in advertising and promotions for Lou's Records in Leucadia, was referring to the March ...

"It Was Just Too Hard to Keep People from Drinking"

"It was just too hard to keep people from drinking." Nicholas Lynch explains why he had to pull the plug on Hellfire House, the punk venue that he ran out of his Vista carpentry shop. ...

Former Oceanside Resident

Former Oceanside resident and El Camino High School graduate Denise Richards is seeking a divorce from actor Charlie Sheen, whom she married on June 15, 2002. Court papers filed Wednesday, March 2, cite "irreconcilable differences." ...

The Queens of the Stone Age, Lenny Kravitz, and Gwen Stefani

The Queens of the Stone Age, Lenny Kravitz, and Gwen Stefani are three headliners who are expected to be in the lineup when the House of Blues San Diego officially announces its first lineup on ...

When 4th & B Opened

"When 4th & B opened [in 1996], everybody expected the Belly Up to curl up and die, but it didn't," said 4th & B general manager Ray Johnson, who claims he isn't worried about the ...

When Grateful Dead Guitarist Bob Weir

When Grateful Dead guitarist Bob Weir played 4th & B on February 9, Doug Hackett caught him walking into the venue at 8 p.m. Hackett tells me, "Bob...tripped and fell on the stairs leading up ...

Guitarist Jonny "2 Bags" Wickersham Joined Social Distortion

Guitarist Jonny "2 Bags" Wickersham joined Social Distortion when cofounder Dennis Danell died five years ago. Before that he played in the Cadillac Tramps. "We used to come down and play Iguanas," he said, referring ...

I Was Traveling for a Fiber Optic Company

I was traveling for a fiber optic company in Europe and the States," says singer Doug Benson about his beginnings with the Johnny Cash tribute band Cash'd Out, which performs tomorrow night at the Tower ...

Static-X Has Parted Ways With Guitarist Tripp Eisen

"Static-X has parted ways with guitarist Tripp Eisen, effective immediately," states a February 28 press release from the heavy-metal band. The last time the band played San Diego was September 1, 2004, headlining at Soma. ...

Jaimie Chambers, 25, is the Youngest On-Air Personality

Jaimie Chambers, 25, is the youngest on-air personality at KTLA Channel 5. He's also guitarist in the local band Windsor, which includes three Torrey Pines High graduates. Chambers files news segments and does a daily ...

Rolling Stone's March 10 List

Rolling Stone's March 10 list of "Ten Artists to Watch" includes Louis XIV, calling them "a sex-obsessed, T. Rex-loving, glam foursome from San Diego whose self-released album and EPs scored local radio play, a slot ...

Ramble on two wheels through San Diego County's sleepy Lake Morena and Campo region.

The rural landscape spreading north and east of the tiny, border-hugging town of Campo is caught in a time warp. Not much new has appeared hereabouts in the past half-century. Narrow two-lane ribbons of blacktop ...

Dental Anxiety

Dentist, n.: A prestidigitator who, putting metal in one's mouth, pulls coins out of one's pockets. -- Ambrose Bierce I was surrounded by glittering green shamrocks, some made of tinsel, others of poster-board. To my ...

Active Duty

"Usually in the morning I'll make up a playlist for the day and listen to that."

The Reader's Eye on Television

"TODAY IS GOING TO BE A NICE ONE: SUNNY IN THE MORNING to mid-afternoon with partly cloudy skies this evening, but only a slight chance of rain," the blond weatherman in the tailored, navy blue ...

Ghost Renters

“Colonel Manuel Ferrar built it and named it after his wife Rosario. She was the niece of Pio Pico.”

St. Gregory of Nyssa Greek Orthodox Church

"I believe the [Greek Orthodox Church] is the true church, but I'm not going to rub it in anyone's face," said Nazo Zakkak, an altar boy at St. Gregory of Nyssa Greek Orthodox Church. Zakkak ...

Irish Soda Bread

Nanna Kelly came from County Mayo, Ireland. She loved a plate of ham and cabbage with some good potatoes, followed by a fine cup of tea and her own homemade Irish soda bread. Nanna -- ...

March Madness

Head out the door, find a freeway, and drive to Lindbergh Field. Get on a plane and fly to Des Moines, Iowa. Rent a car, motor north on I-35, turn right on Highway 20, turn ...

Glass house

Public radio station KPBS talking head Tom Fudge is steamed that Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger won't appear on These Days, his morning radio talk show. "Maybe it's that so-called liberal reputation we've got," Fudge writes on ...

Stage Irish

In America, everybody is Irish one day a year. Planning for St. Patrick's Day, I headed for what I thought was a new Irish pub. Well, bother and begorrah, I was wrong on both counts. ...

10,000 Buzzing Bees

This is the story of Irwin the Bookman who, with the help of Lenny the Elf and Don the Kid, gives away hundreds of thousands of books a year to schools, teachers, homeschoolers, prisons, homeless ...

Penny Swindlers

It was quintessential San Diego: the son made news stiffing his stock-brokerage customers while the parents made Burl Stiff's Union-Tribune column glorifying the Beautiful People. It went on for years, and the parents were part-owners ...

Curfew? What curfew?

Hey Matt: I've noticed that when the planes begin to take off from the airport at 6:30 a.m., the first plane is always a small propeller commuter plane, which is immediately followed by the big ...

Thursday, March 10

Night at the Races

Hearts pound at Cajon Speedway.

THE #13 STREET STOCK CAR rounded the corner and violently smashed sideways into the wall, and the crowd let out a cheer. The ensuing spinout and flip-over left the car a smoking, flaming tin can, ...

Afterthoughts

Ninety-nine out of a hundred other Hollywood directors would have done the same thing.

Easy Love

“They were very nice people. My only problem was getting the funding to buy wine. They constantly cut my budget.”

Rachel Pink in Manhattan

My blog, Rachelpink Rides the Bus, started as a lark over a long weekend. At first it was an exercise in self-restraint. I thought I was talking too much, talking all the time. I figured ...

North, South, And Sideways

I got a couple of phone calls about parties on a Saturday. The first was from a guy in Mexico who had seen my story about the party I attended in Tijuana. He said, "I'm ...

Back When

Thirty Years Ago Word was out that Blood on the Tracks was Dylan's return home to serious stuff away from the karma clichés and kitsch he indulged in for kicks.... To me, sequestered in Clairemont ...

Leaving the Saints: How I Lost the Mormons and Found My Faith

Leaving the Saints: How I Lost the Mormons and Found My Faith. Crown Publishers, 2005; 320 pages; $24.95. FROM THE DUST JACKET: In a thoughtful examination of faith, Martha Beck chronicles her decision to leave ...

I Was Chased Down

"I was chased down, called [an expletive], and stabbed. I assume they were white supremacists." Rapper/blues guitarist Jae Strawbridge, 25, had just spoken with Johan Acevedo, managing partner of the Longshot bar in San Marcos, ...

Bug Snapshot

'On a daily basis, innumerable signals are broadcast on innumerable frequencies, all passing through our bodies, houses, everything, constantly. Unless we have a receiver tuned to a specific frequency, these invisible transmissions go largely unnoticed...I ...

A Stabbing Occurred at the California Theatre

A stabbing occurred at the California Theatre, 1122 Fourth Avenue, on the night of February 17, according to the San Diego police department's "Watch Commander's Log" (Incident #37682). The victim was the venue's 50-year-old custodian ...

"I Just Stick it in My Ear and Drive"

"I just stick it in my ear and drive," says Emily Vigney (of the Poway-Bernardo Mortuary featured on A&E's Family Plots) about wearing headphones. She owns a 40 GB iPod. "Some people think you're on ...

Brenda Spencer was 16

Brenda Spencer was 16 in January 1979 when she inspired the Boomtown Rats song "I Don't Like Mondays" by opening fire with her father's 0.22 caliber rifle on Grover Elementary School in San Carlos. She ...

Cordless Radio Headsets that Retail for $1100

Cordless radio headsets that retail for $1100 from Muzak (located on Chesapeake Drive in San Diego) have been popping up on eBay, according to a grand theft report (#05-005711) filed by San Diego police officer ...

I Hydroplaned

"I hydroplaned on the road and hit the back of this red truck." Murphy Martin, 16, singer/guitarist with the band Muff, was on the road on a rainy February 19, heading north. "I dented the ...

When it Comes to Marketing

"When it comes to marketing, increased volume has been a staple of radio and TV commercials," says Dan O'Neill, chief technology officer for La Jolla's Trusonic, Inc., the company that broadcasts the music you hear ...

Discover a secretive, 50-foot waterfall in the rocky Arroyo Seco gorge above Pasadena.

The Spanish colonists who christened Arroyo Seco ("dry creek") evidently noted only its lower end -- a sweltering, boulder-strewn wash emptying into the Los Angeles River. It's hard to believe this same watercourse, draining the ...

Cleaning House

Character is so largely affected by association, that we cannot afford to be indifferent as to who or what our friends are. -- Anonymous 'W here's Mary?" Carolyn asked as revelers began to arrive. "Not ...

Full Potential

"It requires lots of practice in the mirror to play with a guitar."

Out of the past

If Pete Wilson is coming back to be mayor of San Diego again, can his old pal Dick Silberman be far behind? So it seemed last week, a day after KPBS talking head Gloria Penner ...

The Reader's Eye on Television

WE WERE ALREADY DRUNK AS HELL. We'd been at a birthday party in an apartment near the airport drinking beer and vodka for hours. The cocaine kept us operating at a normal frequency despite the ...

R.J. Donovan Correctional Facility (Kairos Prison Ministry)

Tall, barbed-wire fences surround R.J. Donovan Correctional Facility near the San Diego-Mexico border. Approximately 5500 inmates call the blue-and-white cement buildings home. Twice a year Kairos Prison Ministry runs a three-day weekend program for the ...

The Celebrity Factor

Jurors who had spent eight days hearing a medical malpractice case were stunned when it was declared a mistrial February 28. All 15 jurors told the plaintiff's attorneys that they would have found the physician ...

Ramen Noodles

'C'mon, Eve. Spend a few more pennies and enjoy your ramen," chided my old college buddy Canisius. "There are some really good ramens out there, and they don't take any longer to prepare." Canisius is ...

Race Day

I bounce over to www.iditarod.com, click on "Race Updates," watch the page load, let loose a sincere but muted, "This is good," pick up the phone, and dial a number in Fairbanks. The receiver clicks, ...

Shoeless on the freeway

Matt: I don't mean to be morbid, maybe just inappropriate, but over the years I keep hearing of pedestrians being hit by cars who literally fly out of their shoes. I'm not talking about your ...

It's a pe-nana!

Matt: My boss told me today that kiwi fruit is a genetically engineered fruit crossing a peach with a banana. PUH-lease tell me this is a farce! -- Gretchen, the net Would you rather be ...

Hare? Rabbit? What's the diff?

Heymatt: What's the difference between a hare and a rabbit? Size? Musical stylings? -- Jay, the net Hair. Hair stylings. Well, actually baby hair. Hares are born with hair, rabbits aren't. Hare babies have their ...

Urinal agonies

Matt: I cannot urinate with some guy standing next to me at the men's room. I know I'm not the only one. I see others afflicted with this block. On a radio show I heard ...

Your Special Island

"What d'ya call people from Guam?" asked my old friend, actor-singer-songwriter George Gerdes, in his coffeehouse performances years ago. His audience would shout out tongue-twisting wild guesses. Then George would shake his head, lean into ...

Hello, Rangoon

“Three days, celebrating the arrival of the monsoon. People throw water at each other. It’s silly but fun.”

Thursday, March 3

Age Gap

May and December make whoopee.

WHILE THE DEBATE OVER GAY MARRIAGE ROILS THE COUNTRY AND INTERRACIAL COUPLES continue to be stigmatized in many communities, the true frontier of romantic transgression can be found in relationships between people of vastly different ...

Success Tour

“The broker gave me six pairs of legs on the streets to introduce my wines to people.”

LifePoint Christian Community

"The seven deadliest words in churches are, 'It's the way we've always done it'," Pastor Ken Hensley remarked. Hensley recently returned to San Diego where he once served five years as pastor of Allied Gardens ...

Wing Man

I went to a party that was going on two weeks before the Super Bowl. The conference championship games were being played to determine who would make it to the big dance. I walked in ...

"He's Got It If He Wants It"

"He's got it if he wants it," said Mike McSweeney, marketing director of Qualcomm Stadium, about Street Scene promoter Rob Hagey. "We have July 29 and 30 on hold." Joe Callahan, spokesman for Hagey, would ...

We All Have Children

"We all have children, and I think it's a good time to be home with them." Without the knowledge of Rick DeVoe Management, which oversees blink-182's business, drummer Travis Barker called up radio station KROQ, ...

Is David Lee Roth the next Howard Stern?

"He was the best so far," said one Infinity/CBS employee about the auditions for a Stern replacement. The former Van Halen lead singer recently tried out as a nighttime talk-show host at FM talk station ...

House of Blues

"House of Blues will significantly change the local landscape," said Jeff Gaulton, citing the new club's arrival as the reason he moved from his position as talent buyer for downtown's 4th & B to the ...

Keyboard Player Lester Alvarez

Keyboard player Lester Alvarez was detained for 25 days five years ago when he immigrated from Cuba while playing with a 12-piece salsa band. "I said I am a Cuban refugee.... They put me in ...

Thanks to Votes Cast by the Public at Christian Music Website

Thanks to votes cast by the public at Christian music website CMCentral.com, Switchfoot won ten awards and beat out P.O.D. as the most popular Christian rock band of 2004. Switchfoot will perform tonight on MTV, ...

The Philadelphia Inquirer

The Philadelphia Inquirer wrote about Unwritten Law's most recent album Here's to the Mourning earlier this month, saying, "San Diego's unruly post-punk posse -- how nasty must you be to get kicked off the Warped ...

You Think You Really Know Me: The Gary Wilson Story

You Think You Really Know Me: The Gary Wilson Story is a documentary that details the life of punk-pop pioneer Wilson. Best known for his 1977 LP You Think You Really Know Me (only 2000 ...

Moog

Moog, a documentary by San Diego musician Hans Fjellestad about the 70-year-old inventor of the Moog synthesizer, had its San Diego premier February 11 at the Museum of Contemporary Art in La Jolla. A February ...

San Diego Police Officer L. Carincross

San Diego police officer L. Carincross took a vandalism report (#05-006601) on January 30 from Francisco Arementa, whose company, Standing Room Mobile Entertainment, is hired by Moondoggie's in Pacific Beach. "He parked his vehicle in ...

Earlier This Month

Earlier this month Billboard.com reported, "Up-and-coming San Diego rock outfit Louis XIV will release its debut album, The Best Little Secrets Are Kept, March 22 via Atlantic. First single 'Finding Out True Love Is Blind' ...

As Underground As They Come

'It's free. It's fun. It's fresh. It's freaky. It's fanatical. It's funky. It's flavorful. It's freakin' rad! Besides, we can't shop all day long, can we?" This is how Isabelle "Izzy" Tihanyi and her sister, ...

It's a Crime: Verbatim Police Reports

ARMED ROBBERY Location: 9310 Kearny Mesa Road Time/Date: 12:30 p.m. on 1/30/05 Investigation: I was dispatched to the Best Western Motel on an armed robbery that had just occurred. The radio message said the suspects ...

Delia’s Secret

“This is what Mexico’s peasants live on. America is exploding because it eats too much.”

The waters of Cedar Creek, southwest of Julian, pack the punch of a double-normal rainfall season as they leap over a 90-foot ledge.

In the aftermath of this season's repeated downpours, San Diego County's "big falls" have been showing their stuff. Big, in this neck of the woods, means a hundred feet or so. Of four such falls ...

Love: It’s What’s for Dinner

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. -- Friedrich Nietzsche 'Are you sure you don't need any help in there?" David asked when he heard me ...

Of a Certain Maturity

"Kids in the clubs are shaking their assets to prerecorded music. I believe they call that progress."

Hot town tonight

Those increasingly frequent shutdowns at the San Onofre Nuclear Generating Station are starting to draw scrutiny from one of the nation's top independent nuclear industry watchdogs. Last week federal regulators said a cooling-water valve that ...

We Say Everything Is Wonderful

'Dear San Diego Tourism Industry: Stay as sweet as you are. Leave the vice to Vegas. But in playing the ingénue, don't get cute with the statistics, as your convention center is now doing. If ...

I Warn People

You can buy a "Brain Machine" at the online store O2Planet.com. According to the site's promotional material, the machine uses light and sound to "induce a range of altered states of consciousness," "quickly achieve states ...

The Reader's Eye on Television

I WAS ALWAYS CHASING CIGARETTES AROUND and grabbing them by the butt. The ashtray before me heaped with gray dust and leafy tubes of cotton. The barbecued tobacco stained my fingers and turned them into ...

Fat Girl: A True Story

Fat Girl: A True Story. Hudson Street Press, a member of Penguin Group USA, Inc.; 2005; 196 pages; $21.95. WHY I WROTE FAT GIRL: I wrote Fat Girl because I'd read books that other fat ...

Suburban Grillmasters

"There's the sign," said my wife Grace. "No, Grace, that's the Colonel. No fried chicken tonight. Tonight is all about the grilling." "No, not that sign. The other one. Behind the Chevron." "Good gravy, you're ...

The Road to Peoria

In the spring of 1903, Wyatt Earp was working as a special assistant to the Los Angeles Police Department and the Chicago Cubs were in town for spring training. The Cubs finished third in the ...

Marmalade

Ma Kelly's birthday is next month, and, for once, we have a gift idea well in advance. Husband Patrick wants to send his mom marmalade. She's been a connoisseur of jams and marmalades since she ...

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