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My boss told me today that kiwi fruit is a genetically engineered fruit crossing a peach with a banana. PUH-lease tell me this is a farce!

-- Gretchen, the net

Would you rather be right or employed? Of course it's a farce, but does your boss want to hear that? Tell him that kiwi fruit is actually part grape, part hamster. Then tell him that a nectarine is a cross between a plum and a peach. Most people believe that, but it's bunk too. A nectarine is just a mutant peach that found a market. No gene tinkering involved.

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