Matthew Craig Burke 1 p.m., April 30
- Community Blog
- Normal Heights Through the Blue and White
Three shall be the number of the counting, and the number of the counting shall be three!
Frogtoes, my man, I gots to hand it to you. I don't know why you're selling all this wicked amazing stuff, but I like your style, bro. Another Runner-Up No Prize for you, home slice! Also, I'm offering a Special Edition No Prize for anyone out there who can identify whence cometh the very idea of the No Prize itself. I gave a hint on the first day, but merely repeating that intel will be Insufficient to win the Glory.
Enough stalling, make with the day's big winner:
What do you do when an evil rabbit threatens to instigate the chi of your brave and faithful knights? Three words: Holy Hand Grenade. I am delighted by any and all references made to Monty Python's Flying Circus, Holy Grail or otherwise. The phrase, "and now for something completely different" titillates me. There is only one tree in my world that begins with the letter "L" (The LARCH). I'm always up for Camel Spotting. My hovercraft is full of eels. And on, and on, ad infinitum, you get the point.
ANYWAYS, as I was saying, I get thrilled to see the occasioal Python reference. Puts me in mind of my childhood.
When I was, like, six (i.e. 5-8) years old, practically still a babe in arms, I joined my father and my Irish Twin (my brother, 18 months my junior) in recording the entire script to The Quest for the Holy Grail on Harry's reel-to-reel tape recorder. (note: Harry = father who Smelt not of Elderberries) Boo-yah! Reel-to-reel recording! Sure, we had access to cassette tapes and the means to record them, but why bother with that when you can do an Old Schooly, high fidelity, reel-to-reel recording of two adolescent kids and a grown man reading the script to one of the funniest movies of all time? Needless to say, it was awesome. I will never, come hell or high water, forget recording some of those scenes. Hearing my five (or so) year old brother struggle through the phrase "but, I thought we were an autonomous collective" was one fine moment. It was topped only by his delight at getting to swear mere minutes later for the line, "[you can tell he's a king] because he doesn't have [four letter word for "dung"] all over him." We laughed, we cried, we had one hell of a time. "Brave Sir Robin" was nearly impossible because, with our adolescent senses of humor in full swing, brother and I could not get through the song without cracking up in absolute hysterics. I mean, "he was not afraid at all to be killed in nasty ways, brave brave brave brave Sir Robin!" How do you expect someone who literally spends his entire day running around and playing in dirt, poking things with sticks, and trying to make himself burp to not absolutely die of laughter? Good times, good times.
After all this reminiscing I googled the Organite (sic) and found out that, "very powerful stuff here!!!!" equates to BB's and quartz crystals ("xtals" on the website. Better for txting?) frozen in fiberglass resin. Also, there may be some machine shop slag in there for good measure.
Now, I am the first to admit that there are all kinds of things I do not understand. This is one of them. If these guys can power my house, awesome! Sign me up. I'll even pay $25 bucks for an ounce of BB's just to save myself the risk of third degree burns from pouring molten fiberglass resin into molds. Sadly, I'm willing to bet my computer will give me a bummed-out look if I try and plug into an Orgone Generator. Maybe if I daisy chain the Holy Hand Grenades and Tower Busters in a series parallel array... nah.
Now go Away or I shall Taunt you a Second Time!
Kidding! Stick around for Fun and greater Excitement
PS - Apparently we cannot swear on here, even when quoting great literature. Interesting--I have personally always thought that 'tis better to be allowed and to choose not to than to not be allowed at all... Meh, rules is rules, I guess.
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- Fundamental(ist) Flaw — Feb. 18, 2014
- Local Neil Diamond impersonator recording album, playing AVO Nov. 17 — Nov. 10, 2012
- Far Side of the Lake — June 1, 2009
- Horizon Christian Fellowship, Clairemont — Feb. 8, 2007
- St. Stephen's Church of God in Christ, Valencia Park — Jan. 26, 2006