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that damn cupboard is so full...i really get tired of pushing pots and pans all around to find the one i want...but every time i decide to remove and AM VETS some of the older ones to create less clutter and more space for the new ones i always get an argument

even the new ones give me a hard time....."no no" they cry out"

"don't take the 3 ply stainless steel away...they tell the greatest stories!!!"

ok...i know it can be boring in the cupboard...and i don't mind when they "TALK AMONGST THEMSELVES"

my lingerie and sox do it so why not the pots and pans?

well here's why!!!

because the Spaghetti pot always hides in the very back of the cupboard and I've reached the point where i have to remove almost all the pots to reach it ...the other day i swear i saw it move over to the other back corner just to taunt me...

italiano sneaky!!!

we had a long conversation the last time i used it...

"u are just double ugly

"voi POT italiano"...

i swear i need to just throw u in the trash and buy a new one

but Italians r persuasive

so then i have to listen to the "litany" of all the most pitiful machinations of the importance of it's being safely enconched in the tried and trued pot list never to be replaced regardless of it's high jinks and pitiful appearance

"remember when u used me everyday to cook that chicken and rice for ur wee dawgies...i was big enough to steam 4 (count em 4) artichokes at the same time...steam broccoli by the bushel...and rice 2....AND PASTA!!!

EVERY KIND OF PASTA...from angel hair to shell macaroni!!!

STEAM PIROGIES and chinese dumplings BEFORE U FRIED THEM

NONE OF UR NEW STUFF CAN DO THAT!!!

BUT potskin...i have a 3 ply stainless steel 4 qt pot with a steamer that can do that and with only Bobby and i to cook for now (that's 2 u irrepressible imp) i don't NEED such a big old ugly pot anymore!!!!

"NOT THE ARTICHOKES" Italiano replies "U CAN ONLY DO ONE IN THAT!!! as it winks it single steam vent eye at me

"AND HOW ABOUT THAT 3 PLY ANYWAY...IT'S OLDER THEN ME BY ABOUT 30 YEARS!!!"

"hey...don't b bringin' us into it Sgetti pot!!!"

"we used to be a set of 7...now we's 3"

"remember when she got rid of the fry pans"??

"yeah" says the 5 quart "and that little one was really cute...remember she had that poacher insert"

"why in hell did she get rid of her"

"well" i countered "even i admit THAT was a mistake"

BUT U NEVER WERE AS ADVERTISED "WATERLESS"

"but advertising always lies to get a sell u dolt" the 3 ply retorts

"u dear 3 ply were my First Anniversary gift in a 3 year marriage"

the "everything sticks" fry pans went when TEFLON came in

and they gave me hell when i tried to keep their lids

"WHINE WHINE WHINE..NO ONE WILL EVER BUY US FROM "AM VETS" WITHOUT OUR LIDS"

and the rest of u called me a traitor for 2 years!!!

~~ungrateful ingrates~~

"but u kept the Teflon after the GREEN PANS arrived"

but i got rid of the cake pans after the Silicone came

"BUT THEY WERE RUSTY"!!! they all exclaimed

they lowered the prestige of the cupboard anyway!!

THE OLD HAVE TO GIVE WAY FOR THE NEW AND THAT'S MY LAST WORD ON THE SUBJECT POTSKINS!!!!

~~but ur old too Nan~~

hhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmm i thought

~~giggles in the pot cupboard signifying they were safe for yet another day~~

Comments

MsGrant April 19, 2010 @ 2:26 p.m.

Pots and pans have many stories to tell! When we sisters all go to my mom's house, we gather the pots and pans to start dinner, and we all say in disgust "you STILL have this old pan?" And then we tell some story about the pan. She has a newer set of pans, and she can't cook with them. "They just don't work the same", she says. She has a colander that is rusty and the base is missing, with her since we were little. I think it was my great-grandmother's. If we ever went to visit her and that old beat-up thing was replaced by a shiny new strainer, we would be very sad.

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nan shartel April 19, 2010 @ 2:36 p.m.

i agree Grantie..that's why i still have my "not often used" 50 yr old "stainless steel 3 ply"...but if they keep on talking back to me...hahahahahaha...i may change my mind!!!

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nan shartel April 19, 2010 @ 2:40 p.m.

my poor bedraggle Stainless troop have imparting cooking history to the silicone cake pans and the Green pans a lot lately

snickers

to get them on their side!!!

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nan shartel April 19, 2010 @ 2:43 p.m.

that's "have been imparting" peeps

(dang)

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CuddleFish April 19, 2010 @ 3:16 p.m.

Oh nan, these enchanting stories go straight to my heart, thank you. You really do make Chicken Soup for the Soul taste so good. Don't get rid of those pots!!! xxxx

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nan shartel April 19, 2010 @ 10:24 p.m.

as Jimmy Durante sang in "Sleepless in Seattle" Cuddles

~~Make Someone Happy~~Make Just One Someone Happy~~Then You'll Be Happy Too~~

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antigeekess April 20, 2010 @ 4:40 a.m.

This is just darling, nan.

Maybe a collection of stories about some of your very animated inanimate objects might make a book? Or two, or three, over the years.

Then your books could all argue amongst themselves on the shelf. They would consider themselves above your magazines, I'm sure; even moreso in regard to the myriad of common, disposable catalogs brought by the mail carrier. They don't live very long, the poor catalogs -- mere fodder for the recycling bin. The mayflies of the printed and bound (or stapled) word.

http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/amc0604l.jpg (Yes, it's a cartoon about both mayflies and publishing. DAMN I'm good.)

Your new books might be intimidated by your old academic texts, however. Textbooks can be such annoying smartypantses.

:)

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Joe Poutous April 20, 2010 @ 10:17 a.m.

I have a Dutch oven that was handed down from my great grandma (dad's mother's mother).

When I was a freshman in highschool I lived with my Grandma Kaufman. She lived a couple of blocks from the school I was attending, and I could walk to school instead of getting a ride from my dad all the way from Santee to North Park.

It was her mission in life to fatten me up.

I was 5'10" - 105 lbs. I would wake up to the smells of pancakes and bacon.

I still remember her teaching me to make apple pie.

25 years later and I'm still a beanpoll.

I think of her when I use her oven. I'm going to have to make an apple pie soon. - Joe

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nan shartel April 20, 2010 @ 1:40 p.m.

aaaaaahhhhhhhh Tiki...that's a sweet story...and Grantie urs is 2

i wish i could say i have some pots and pans from my Grammy...but i don't...i spent lots of time with her before i went to boarding school and she had Cast Iron...she also cooked on a Wood stove...used Lard to make pie crust..u might think about that Tiki...no pie crust is as light and flaky as one made with Lard

i'm more or less a beanpole 2 Tiki...hahahahahahahaha...not a lot of meat but IT'S CHOICE...HAHAHAHAHAHA

a Dutch oven is something i don't have...and a rice steamer...i think i should try the bamboo ones u put on the top of the pan for steaming

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nan shartel April 20, 2010 @ 1:51 p.m.

antiG...i never thought of turning these "talking to my-----(fill in the item)" as vignettes i could sell as a book

i mostly do them for Cuddles cause it make her smile

and they're easy to do

i'm a cripple writing wise if i try on Religion..Politics...Social Issues...etc

i just can't organize them well...sound cogent and fully cover all the "talking points" with any amount of aptitude so i write poetry...funny stuff...some philosophical meandering

i could discourse on Existentialism if anyone wanted too...or Logic...or Metaphysic...any of the soft muddy sciences no one ever cares about clarifying...

but i will think about it antiG

really i will

~~as she chuckles about two unfinished books and poems to dark to put in the READER~~ :-))

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nan shartel April 20, 2010 @ 1:53 p.m.

Textbooks can be such annoying smartypantses.

truer words were never spoken antiG ;-)

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