"If you get drunk, you miss all the fun!" --Hamburg University Drinking Club, Hamburg, Germany The latest incident involving Shawne Merriman and Tila Tequila has pointed out that the term (bowlderized for The Reader's protection) "Instant Adam-Henry...just add alcohol" is …

"It's easy to quit smoking...I've done it hundreds of times!" --Mark Twain First off, let me preface today's entry with my own views of the usage of tobacco products. I grew up in a military family, where tobacco was part …

"Then they watch the progress he makes." --Iron Maiden, from the title track of "Seventh Son Of A Seventh Son." Well, my readers, I now have a new buddy. No, I did not go out and get another pet--our property …

"Being In The NFL Is A Privilege...Not A Right!" --"Philly Billy" Werndel, sports-talk jock. In all of the hubub over Michael Vick's Traveling Redemption Show and Flagellation Hour, we almost forgot that there was another case involving an NFL star …

"In Order To Be The Man, You Gotta Beat The Man-- "Nature Boy" Ric Flair Well, it looks like Hades had itself a helluva cold snap...for Michael Vick is now a Philidelphia Eagle. Megajinkies--what a turn of the screw this …

"If you think that this looks like fun, ask the manager about the daily special!"--Seen on a flyer outside of a Albertson's in 2003, during the "Great San Diego County Grocery Lock-Out." When it comes to what I have on …

"One Man's Fun Is Another's Hell!"--Metallica, from "My Friend Of Misery" We are now in the "lazy crazy, hazy days of Summer." For many, this time of year means visions of the beach, swimming pools, ice-cream--and many other summertime niceities. …

"No matter if a dictatorship comes from the left or the right--it's still a dictatorship!"--Perry Deane Young. I often get missives in the mail from groups wanting my cash, my time, or for me to join them (more often than …

"So take this number...and welcome to Operation:Mindcrime!"--Queensryche, from the title track to "OPERATION:MINDCRIME" Good morning, folks! Right now, I am at the Vista Public Library, getting in my two-hour daily run on their Internet-capabale computers. I checked my blog today, …

"For all the sins you will commit, you'll beg forgiveness...AND NONE I'LL GIVE!!" --Iron Maiden, from "Moonchild" on SEVENTH SON OF A SEVENTH SON As it stands now, the fuddy-duddies who run the Executive and Legislative branches in Sac-Town couldn't …

"His Eyes Are Ablaze...See The Madman In HIs Gaze!" --Iron Maiden, from "Flight Of Icarus" fom PIECE OF MIND, More and more, I am reading about a movement called "Mad Pride" or "The Icarus Movement." These folks often tell us …

"Those that play with serpents...Get bit by serpents!" --Jake "The Snake" Roberts, WWE "Ring of Fame" Grappler. Many folks don't know this about me, but I love to read magazines about fishing, hunting, and the great outdoors. To me, nothing …

"Before you judge me...take a look at you!" --Metallica, from "Holier Than Thou." on the "BLACK" album. May is Mental Health Awareness Month. Why the nimrods who picked this month to foster awareness of mental health clients and issues is …

Morning, folks! If 1981 was the "Morning In America," then 2006 marked the beginning of "A Nightmare In The State Legislature." By this, I mean that in the year I noted, we began to find out what a bunch of …

When you think of a pet, what comes to mind? A dog? A cat? A white tiger? These do make great pets (in the case of the last one, however, keep at your own risk), but I have a little …

Good Morning! Today is April 15th...and your membership dues are due today! What dues? Why, your yearly dues to the greatest club of all...American citizenship! If you already have paid, our nation thanks you, and we'll see ya next year! …

"So what did you expect? --The Waco Kid (Gene Wilder) to Black Bart (Cleavon Little), from the Mel Brooks classic "BLAZING SADDLES" The budget is here, finally! Lots of programs nuked, lot of tax revenues slashed away...and still only three …

We live in a very strange place, Southern California. On one hand, our region is comprised of coastal desert, with an ocean on the far left, and the Laguna/Sierra mountain range to the right. We don't get much in the …

"It's starting again... there's no shelter from the wind! Like a fire from the sky-- Winds Of Change Are Blowing BY!" --from "Winds Of Change" by Jefferson Starship Here it is, wintertime. Though next Monday marks the Winter Solstice, you …

Ah, yes, Christmastime! The time of year when every person can feel like royalty...or feel royaly screwed! Your choice on this, folks. After all, Santa only delivers toys, not miracles. It's the time of the year where we celebrate the …