TDSanDiego

Comments by TDSanDiego

Afro Puffs

Thank you Elizabeth Salaam for writing this piece. It was very very relevant to what **black parents** who live in San Diego go through when choosing the proper schools and neighborhoods to raise their children. You really have to be a black parent with school-age children to truly appreciate what the author is saying about diversity in San Diego. San Diego has a very small black population and of the black children being born, most are of mixed race. Being a fully black child vs. a mixed black child can carry two different experiences. Its not fun and can be quite uncomfortable being the only one of your race at work or school, but particularly while in school. We live in City Heights but I commute every morning to send my son to a charter school downtown. When choosing elementary schools for my son of course I looked at API scores and took tours and whatnot. But one thing that stuck out in my mind when searching for a school that met my sons needs was how diverse schools were, namely how many black students there were, and would he be the only black student in his class. Turns out he was the only black kid in his class and one of only two in all of kindergarten, and surprise, the other student was half white. Because of this I especially appreciate the example of the friends who live in Bay Park. Like them, I too am grappling with whether to keep my son in his predominately white charter school up to a certain grade, and when, if ever, to send him to a school where he is not the only smart black boy. Regarding the cover the author is merely stating what is pretty darn obvious in the dating world of interracial relationships, many many black men dating every other race of women, but not so much black women. Quite frankly the high percentage of black women being snubbed by black men can sometimes be attributed to our hair. My example, a couple of years ago my husband and I were talking with his two younger brothers, one in high school, the other in middle school, about dating and what kind of girls they like. Their response: “We want a mixed girl or a mexican girl, they are the prettiest.” We asked them why, and they responded, “we don't want no black girl with nappy chicken head hair.” So those who thought this article was offensive to black women need to understand black women are looked down upon as unattractive and less beautiful by societies standards of beauty. The statement that “ the white girls like the black guys, and etc.” is merely an observation of what we see in the world, and I have heard many folks make the same observation too, its not new at all. I too have a daughter and one thing I have decided is to send her to a school where there are other little girls who look like her. And that is simply because she needs to feel good about her hair and her beauty. If you don't get this piece, well its cause you haven't lived it to understand it.
— July 14, 2012 10:12 p.m.