Photograph Courtesy of the Beresford Family

“The surfing community is pretty open and inclusive now and it’s heading in the right direction,” says Jana Beresford, noting there are still “lingering stereotypes.”

Old Surfer Dude recommends respect

I feel I have the cred to comment on this article (“Kooks and Chaos”, Cover Story, February 8), since I have the experience, expertise, and age. What it comes down to is respect. Respect is only given, and in doing so, it is earned. When one paddles out, one must assume that every surfer in the water is better. You may be a great surfer, but if you’re having a bad day, you’re a dangerous kook. Act accordingly, and, surprisingly, your day will get better.

It takes a lot of experience to recognize when one can take off. The trouble is exacerbated when it gets crowded. Some surfers won’t make the wave and some will. So you have to watch the other surfers, too.

Experienced surfers sometimes just have to tell themselves, “Yeah, that surfer just might make it, and she’s in the right position,” and then back off. Trust me, there will be another wave.

Respect.

Chaos ensues, particularly in the waves, which are the epitome of chaos. The only thing I’ve seen change over the years is the number of women in the water. Face it guys, they have the strength-to-weight ratio over you, which makes them a better paddler.

As for the article, well, the author is no William Finnegan.

This irked me. The referenced boards aren’t SoftTops (which is the brand name of styrofoam core board with an epoxy bottom and a rubber top), they’re foam boards, or foamies. Most foamies have a very low performance and won’t do a lot of damage. That said, I have surfed on an original Morey-Doyle single fin in double overhead and ripped it. It didn’t fare well at Tamarindo.

In closing. BE SAFE. Actually, it’s OK not to be safe, but only if you are the only one at risk.

Old Surfer Dude

Carlsbad

Solidarity with the struggle

I don’t know what fourth-wave feminism is, and at this point, I’m too afraid to ask (“Dudes to Dads”, Cover Story, February 15).

If we say “patriarchy” enough times, do we summon the beast into a tangible existence so we can beat it up? These broad societal terms are helpful in some circles, but detract from the (wonderful) message of the article.

Yes, mental health for everyone! Yes, we’re all fucking struggling out here! YES, get off social media poison and into your life. Yes, say that shit out loud! Yes, we’re all scared, we all want to run away. Man, woman, we’re all screwed. Shame cannot survive being spoken.

Mom of two who suffered extreme postpartum psychosis and had zero help from man or society: NO ONE should struggle. So what if the “center for excellence” has to hide behind masculine terms to get men to seek help? If it works, it works. None of us know what the hell we’re doing. We all just want to be okay. The only way out is through, my dudes. SAY IT OUT LOUD and you’ll find a million people who need to hear your pain.

Kimmy J

Ramona

Fewer kids, please

(“Dudes to Dads”, Cover Story, February 15) It seems to be an advertisement for Singley’s business. And more evidence for public funding of free vasectomies upon request. Helpful: the observation about the difference between priorities of mothers (safety) vs fathers (provide experiences).

Ann Viera

Chula Vista

Bring back the blank

Years ago I remember the Reader used to have a yearly art contest where readers could draw on a blank cover What made you decide to discontinue the art contest?

John Smith

Pacific Beach