“Well, open the box,” I prompted.
“Oh,” Jenny said with a bit of disappointment. But when she saw the pamphlets and software, she lit up again. “It is!”
“There’s more,” I said, indicating she should continue to fish around inside the box. Everyone else in the room seemed as confused as the bride. Finally, Jenny lifted a cardboard panel to reveal colorful tissue paper, into which six pairs of practical but cute panties had been folded.
My mother breathed a sigh of relief, and Jenny seemed flummoxed. The gag of my gift was to have everyone expect the worst and then throw them with something completely...
tasteful. It never occurred to me that Jenny would have been ecstatic to receive an external hard drive and disappointed to find panties where the device should have been.
Because I felt bad and wanted to put a smile on Jenny’s face (while cleverly stealing the spotlight), I called everyone to attention and, in a raised voice, explained the last game Heather had devised.
“Here in my hand are some things Jenny said while opening her presents. I will read them now, and you are to think of them as though they are the things Jenny will say on her wedding night.” When the playful gasps subsided, I began with: “I know this game. Nothing is coming out of my mouth.” By the time I’d reached the last phrase, “It’s so big, how could I not find it?” all faces in the room were strained from laughing. When I saw Jenny’s face contorted in the unlikely combination of mortification and sheer delight, I knew it was “mission accomplished” for this bridal shower, and I wanted nothing more than to do it again.