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Mary Jo and her friends Jackie, Mary Ellen, and Kelly decided to form an organization that "fights frump," an anti-Red Hat Society. A friend once told Mary Jo, "We don't see you wearing a red hat, but a red thong." I asked the Blue Thong Society women at their party at the Marriott Del Mar why the color of the thong changed from red to blue. Jackie said, "[Blue] stands for harmony, sympathy, friendship, and loyalty among the enlightened and dynamic women of today." The Blue Thong Society expected attendance at their event to be about 100, but they received a crowd of almost 250. I was one of the few men there, but I wasn't complaining. I was happy with the ratio.

I saw a few customized hot rods in the parking lot when I arrived and thought, These women have some sweet rides. I discovered the Good Guys Rod and Custom Association was also having a party here, in conjunction with a car show at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. They didn't seem to mind the women partying nearby.

I said to my friend Julie that the band should do a version of "Devil in a Blue Dress" and change the lyric to "blue thong." Someone overheard me and suggested "Blue Thong" instead of "Blue Moon." We spent five minutes going through song titles like that. The crowd got going when the song "Chain of Fools" was played.

I couldn't believe the number of women crammed into the room. There were 20 people in line for drinks -- the Blue Martini was the most popular. The line for the potato bar was going out the door. People were piling mashed potatoes into a large wine glass, along with the different toppings -- broccoli, salsa, cheese, chives, sour cream.

There were blue thongs piled on a table, a mix of what thongs used to be -- flip-flops -- and what they are today -- bikini bottoms. Trying to get a picture of both types of thong, I moved them together. As I snapped the photo, I noticed smoke. I had thrown a bikini onto a candle and it caught fire. I put it out and looked around. Only one woman noticed. I folded the thong so the black spot I burned in it wouldn't show. The woman smiled at my clumsiness. I said, "Well, instead of bra burning, it was thong burning."

Julie and I went outside so I could smoke a cigar. A waiter came over and asked us what we wanted. I said, "A bottle of your finest champagne." As he said, "I'll go get the wine steward," I had to yell, "I'm joking. Just a bottle of your finest water." I'm not sure if he was joking or this is how they roll in Del Mar, but I was given a liter bottle of Acqua Panna. It would take me a week to drink that!

I talked with Mary Jo, who was an athletic looking blonde surfer. She said that today's 50-year-old is like yesterday's 30-year-old. I asked her how much it costs to join The Blue Thong Society, and she told me $29 annually.

I heard her talking later about a surf camp she runs for girls called Surf Divas.

Since there were only a few men here, I asked each one why they attended. One told me he was a cameraman filming the event for KUSI. Another told me he was their attorney and was invited. Another guy was a high-school friend of one of the founders and was there to show his support.

I noticed that there was a basketball game on TV and mentioned that none of the women here would be interested in hoops. A woman overheard me and said I was being sexist, that she was a basketball fan. I asked her to name the teams that were in the NCAA Final Four this year. She named them all without hesitating. I felt stupid. And sexist.

When the door prizes were given out, the women went crazy. A number was called out, and a woman said she won. She went to pick up her prize, and it turned out her number was one off. They said, "Oh, well, that's close enough. Here you go."

I talked to another founder, Jackie. I called her Jackie Blue, after the song. She told me that she knew Marlon Brando and James Coburn and that she partied with comedian George Carlin before his show at Humphrey's. Jackie told me a story that won her a prize on the Jeff and Jer radio show. The story involved her climbing up a billboard with a boyfriend, and the rest isn't fit for print.

There were several attractive women at this event, correcting another sexist thought I had, that women over 50 can't be hot. But they can. I noticed a few who looked crazy, such as the woman with curly hair who reminded me of Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. She looked like Close and kept looking around wildly as if she was playing the part. When they ran out of wine glasses at the potato bar, a waiter explained that they were in the process of washing them. I thought two women were going to kill the man. I had his back, though.

There were women here from New York, Wisconsin, Oregon, Texas, and Florida, and I talked to two from Arizona. One of them said, "I like this group of women. This organization is about having people get the pickle out of their ass. No religion, no politics...." She gave me a business card from her organization in Arizona -- Champagne Sistas.

When I mentioned that there were several women who were obviously under 50, I was told that they have different chapters and that there are different age groups of Blue Thongers.

Julie was getting buzzed from her second Blue Martini, and she asked me if I wanted to finish it off before we headed out. The women had more prizes to give out. They ranged from free haircuts to surf lessons to a skin-treatment party. When I found out that the crowd would be voting on what their favorite thong was and realized that they would see that I had burned a hole in one, I told Julie we had to leave.

Crash your party? Call 619-235-3000 x421 and leave an invitation for Josh Board.

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