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With our Natuzzi Italian leather love seats on a four-month back order, I've been wringing my hands over the fact that all we have in our new home are a few futon mattresses and a whole lot of boxes. What I have to remember is that David has the magical ability to hold his own in this building of natural-born interior designers.

So while I flit around each floor popping open bottles of champagne in celebration and extreme enthusiasm with all of my wonderfully gay, fellow new homeowners, David will be putting the finishing touches on our penthouse in the homosexual sky. After all, I wouldn't want the boys to be distressed or distracted by the wrong lighting or unfortunate color scheme when they arrive for a fabulous night of cocktails and dancing on the rooftop terrace.

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