The concoction has less to do with pigskins or gridirons than with making a cocktail using coconut water.
Joseph O'Brien 4 p.m., March 29
I've lived in Mountain Shadows Mobile Park since 1994, with few problems. At one time, I became a friend of one manager. We still e-mail each other occasionally. I don't know the latest one, but she obviously isn't too swift.
My neighbor knocked on my door to tell me that a pipe was leaking. He said he was having coffee with Joe, the park maintenance man in the morning. He'd let him know about the problem.
At 8 a.m., my dog barked wildly. I yelled at her, but she wouldn't shut up. I figured she was barking at someone walking by. Then I heard a very soft knock on the door. I hadn't heard it before. I got up and found Joe outside my door. He wanted to look at the leak. I said, "Sure," and went back to bed. Later, I called the manager to see what Joe found. I asked her if the leak was my problem or the park's. She said, "It's on you." I said, "Thank you," and hung up. Joe called and wanted to look at the leak again. I said, "O.K."
By then I was dressed and went into the backyard with him. He said that the leak was my responsibility because it was coming from the faucet and not the pipe. Then he said it was so easy to fix, he'd take a couple of minutes and do it, but that he was not obligated to do so. I thanked him profusely.
At 6:30 p.m., someone knocked on my door. When I went to answer it, I saw a police officer looking through the window. My heart dropped to my knees. My 20-year-old daughter has mental health issues and recently took off for Hawaii. She has no phone. I nearly got hysterical, thinking the officer was there to tell me she was dead.
As it turned out, the manager reported me on a 415 because I was"belligerent and refused to let workers come on to my property to fix the leak." I told the officer the only one I was belligerent to was my dog that morning, and the problem had been fixed.
I told him that I was furious and was going to raise hell. He didn't blame me. He said that I obviously wasn't belligerent and that he'd rather be out chasing crooks. I felt like calling her and chewing her ass out, but I was afraid she'd call the S.W.A.T. team or maybe the F.B.I.
I'm going to the Homeowner's meeting in two weeks to demand an apology. I was so shaken, I had to take some Lorazepam and go to bed. I couldn't do my assignment for class the next day. I think there should be laws prohibiting outrageous acts of stupidity. Then I'd sue this incompetent dumbbell right into the ground.