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Back when I essayed at length on my problems with season one of this downbeat drama that so many people love to hate and hate to love ("Does the Walking Dead Stink, Or ???"), my POV landed pretty firmly on "stink." But I saw enough in the final few eps to draw me into at least giving season two a chance.

I STILL have major problems with everything about the very "how to make a zombie" premise. I mean, if you need to be BIT by a flesh eating walker to become one, how come so many tens of thousands of people got BIT, but NOT EATEN?! How the frack does everyone get close enough to walkers to get bit, but then get away with their hides otherwise intact???

That, and stuff like how you can shoot a walker in the heart and lungs, with no effect...but walkers can supposedly SMELL live meat?! If one has no circulatory system, and doesn't need to breathe, they can't effin smell, But anyway...

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The new Walking Dead eps have developed the characters with somewhat more compelling storylines and scenes this season, giving the actors a chance to, at least on (all-too-brief) occasions, really shine.

It's been a decent enough season. Especially when compared to the lumbering first season, many aspects of which I simply have to ignore if I'm to enjoy the current storyline(s).

That said, even tho I've watched every episode this season (and actually WATCHED them, as opposed to running the TV in the background while I work), I still can't make sense of some stuff.

Such as: After the Shane/Rick brawl that left Shane battling walkers from inside the bus, he appeared to use the SAME knife that he used to skewer a walker's skull to then cut his arm and draw blood to attract walkers to the bus doorway.

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If a mere bite turns you, shouldn't using your knife to be "blood brothers" with a walker also turn you?

SPOILER ALERT: If the dual-use knife WAS partly behind Shane going all feral and huffy-puffy BEFORE Rick shot him, days later (unstated, but possible), WTF took so long for the walker blood in his system to kick in?

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And has the black guy EVER had more than five sentences of dialogue (TOTAL!) this season? What is this, Ghostbusters????

Image (http://cdn.videogum.com/files/2011/11/noticer.jpg)

Then there's Sunday night's walker-riffic season finale:

First of all, it was shot so dark, I couldn't even tell who the frak died?! [YEP, MORE SPOILERS] I barely remember either of the characters killed - one of the daughters had a boyfriend? Okay, he almost never had lines, so kill him. But who was the woman who got eaten? Otis' girlfriend?

The only time I recall ever seeing either character was when everyone was setting a big dinner table. Did they even have any dialogue this season? It's as if the lazy writers just wanted to kill SOMEBODY in the season finale, and pulled these hardly seen characters out of the mist, just to be walker food.

Image So doomed, they might as well wear red velour shirts with Starfleet insignia....

As for the [SPOILER ALERT] CDC scientist whispering something (that we couldn't hear) in Rick's ear last season, and Sunday's revelation that he told Rick "Everyone's already infected," I don't believe for a moment that the writers knew WHAT CDC guy said in season one until they were mostly done with season two.

The "everybody turns when they die" angle was never so much as HINTED until just before the season two finale, when they found the two dead cops with no apparent bites. The writers were laugh-out-loud obvious about making sure we all noticed this sudden abrupt "surprise" by repeatedly mentioning it (via character dialogue) over the last coupla eps this season.

The writers have admitted they're making things up as they go along, to keep the TV show different from the comics (which are apparently up to around 100 issues now). It sure shows when they take such sharp left turns into "where the hell did THAT come from?!"

Overall tho, despite its creaky flaws (all way-too-predictable, even to those of us who HAVEN'T read the comic books), the finale was quite nearly a feature-film worthy action-packed triumph. I'm learning that, to enjoy this show, I need to ignore its usual cliche fallbacks, like the disposable castmembers all but unseen other than the few minutes it took to kill 'em.

Image At least the writers changed their mind about killing Herschell, farm owner and (as of the season finale, anyway) all around badass.

Image That scene on Sunday of Herschell shotgun-defending his farm like Ash from Evil Dead rocked, as did the shot of him looking back at his burning home.

The leathery old guy who plays Herschell is by far the best actor of the lot, on top of the fact that his character is the only one on the show I might enjoy knowing in "real" life. Has there ever been another TV show so fully populated by hateful, shallow, unlikeable characters that even its biggest fans can't stand?

I'm sure people on all those chatty WD message boards have pointed out how strongly the show's premise resembles the wilder (and sillier) interpretations of Biblical accounts some call "the Rapture." All the "saved" people vanish, leaving behind the damned to suffer apocalyptic plague and punishment.

While ANY attempt to "interpret" the Book of Revelations STARTS OUT ludicrous (it's allegorical prophecy, not documentary), the so-called "Rapture" WOULD explain why just about everyone on the show is a flamin' arsewipe that most viewers would be happy to see die.

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Comments

Scott Marks March 21, 2012 @ 10:13 a.m.

Copping a sneaker, eh? This isn't a movie! :P

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Jay Allen Sanford March 21, 2012 @ 7:54 p.m.

Yeah, but I watch it on a Big Screen! And I gotta give the show props for a second feature film-worthy season finale, even if I feel like I wasted enough time GETTING there that I coulda watched at least five Larry Cohen movies insteada the walking deadheads puttering around Herschell's farm and playing Green(skin) Acres...

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