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Same carnage, different kids. This time the torture-porn embraces alternative forms of medicine like acupuncture and laser surgery. (If you have a thing about eyes, it’s best to close yours.) There’s a a terrific mounting sight gag (did you hear the one about the gymnast, a thumbtack, and a balance beam?), but the film is never able to top its spectacular opening CG destruction of a bridge during rush hour. ( If you see it, see it in 3-D.) And not unlike a porno, you’re going to want to scan through the dialog scenes. Steven Quale directed. With: Nicholas D'Agosto, Emma Bell, Courtney B. Vance, and the laughably bad Miles Fisher.

Reader Rating: One Star

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