What to do with Qualcomm Stadium post-Chargers?

Break it up into haulable chunks, truck those chunks down to Mission Bay, load them onto barges (it'll probably take a lot of trips), take those barges offshore Mission Beach, drop them shallow enough that they don't cover Wreck Alley but end up making a nice reef break. At the former Q-comm site, scrape away all the dirt that has a large plume of gasoline embedded within, haul THAT to Black Rock Desert for the next Burning Man Festival, stick The Man atop the mound of contaminated dirt and light it off. Rehabilitate Mission Valley riverbed area with native species of flora and fauna, including "Stanky Bob" "Sweaty Betty" and the rest of the homeless denizens of the riverbed who make a living harvesting goodies from the condo dwellers on the other side of the fence next door. Let Stanky and Sweaty "repurpose" (dumb term) the banners strung around the top of the stadium as tents. They can also use the light reflectors as cooking pots and stills (but someone has to tell them to remove the bulbs first). They can put the stadium seats along the banks of the river and sit back, smoke a fatty, guzzle brewskis and watch as the El Nino rains flood the riverbed in front of them. Finally, the San Diego River's name will be changed to "Rivers River" in honor of our famed quarterback who probably cried rivers of tears because he never had any protection in "the pocket", but still managed to throw that ball a zillion yards. Problem solved!
— November 12, 2015 9:09 p.m.

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