An Italian tour bus driver proposes to a German stewardess before a careless collision with the empyreal French cyclist in the title finds him playing daddy to her two adorable kids, fathered by an estranged Australian ex. Its bright lighting, even lines, cheery Technicolor hues, and nauseatingly intrusive imitation-Karen Carpenter pop score help to make this United Nations of screwball comedy cliches feel and sound a lot livelier than writer, director Jeremy Leven’s inanimate staging and script would suggest. If ever a film cried out for a PG-13 rating, it’s this one. You won’t hear me complain about having to gaze upon a naked Louise Monet, and while it’s open for debate as to whether this was the right genre picture for nudity, I know for a fact the film’s plethora of sexist asides were most unwarranted. With Vincenzo Amato and Nora Tschirner. 2013.

1.0 stars

— Scott Marks

This movie is not currently in theaters.

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