Moved to tears by Dave’s Hot Chicken

“Due to its extremely hot nature, eating a Dave’s Hot Chicken reaper carries with it the potential for certain risks, some of which may be reasonably foreseeable.”

So reads the “reaper release,” the liability waiver you’re asked to sign when you order the “reaper,” the hottest of seven levels of spiciness served by Dave’s Hot Chicken. The Nashville hot chicken franchise from Los Angeles recently opened its first San Diego location, in Pacific Beach, having garnered long lines and near universal praise since opening in 2017.

The tongue-in-cheek waiver would release the restaurant from liability in case of “bodily injury, property damage, emotional distress, or even death,” and I suppose that last part would be a bit funnier if Pacific Beach hadn’t recently been tabbed a “coronavirus hot spot”. Nevertheless, I donned my mask and braved the socially distant line that already seems a permanent fixture outside the joint.

Why? Because fried chicken is awesome, and with Nashville hot chicken finally trending in San Diego, this promises to be our fieriest rendition to date. Also, my girlfriend’s kids wanted to see if I was really tough enough to handle the reaper. And the youngest not so secretly hoped it would be hot enough to make me cry.

Like many restaurants these days, Dave’s is take-out only, so I made it in and out of Pacific Beach without spending more than a couple minutes inside the restaurant — order online, and they’ll bring it to you curbside.

The chicken was still tender inside and crispy outside when we settled down for a hot chicken picnic in the grass of Mission Bay Park. At $3.50 apiece, I’d picked up seven chicken tenders, ranging from beige to magenta, each representing a different level of spice. For those who don’t appreciate heat, the level one, no-spice chicken is pretty tasty in its own right. It’s not until level four, medium, that you really start to sense a little burn, and not til level six, extra hot, that I was ready to admit, through capsaicin-induced hiccups, that yes, this is some spicy fried chicken.

I could have left it at extra hot and been happy, but the kids wanted a show, so I started digging into a reaper tender. It tasted fantastic, and with the children watching, my tentative first bite quickly became a hearty fourth bite. Problem is, this spice is a creeper.

At 30 seconds, my lips went numb, then started to burn, like I was trying to kiss a toaster. By 45 seconds, the heat began to build on the back of my tongue. At a minute, my nose started to run, and I started breathing hard in a futile effort to cool my mouth. Not long after, my eyes began to water. That was enough for the kids.

“The reaper made Ian cry!” they crowed.

Served with sliced pickles and white bread, the tenders come with a chipotle-mayo dubbed “Dave’s sauce,” and small packets of honey, which works pretty well to contrast the heat. The more popular order seems to be the $5.50 chicken sliders, where the hot chicken tenders are served on a bun with kale slaw, pickles, and sauce. As hot as you like it.