Breaking: Local ingrate forgets Mother's Day, Reader saves day twice

Dear Hipster:

So, I was reading the Mother’s Day issue of the Reader, which I didn’t get a chance to look over until Monday, and it hit me that I forgot to send my mom a card, or call, or anything. So, I called her, and she was justifiably mad. How should I ameliorate her wounded feelings? Thanks to you guys for reminding me sooner rather than later, at least.

— Rick, Ramona

Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster in all his noodly glory that the Reader is there to help men upset their mothers slightly less than they otherwise might! What would y’all do without us? But, srsly, you may recall from the entire Mother’s Day issue that moms tend to be forgiving of their childrens’ foibles. Nevertheless, it wouldn’t hurt to maybe get her that missed brunch. It won’t make up for young oversight, but just because something won’t right a wrong doesn’t prevent it from being right in its own right.

Bonus fun: I’ll send a special hipster prize to the first person who can correctly rephrase that tasty maxim without a single negative. Email answers to hipster@sandiegoreader.com.