Mother Nature lays waste to Balboa Park after learning of canceled 2020 Earth Day celebration

Mama’s Mad

Author

By Walter Mencken

Publish Date

May 1, 2020

The Museum of Man’s California Tower sends up a thick column of inky smoke as it burns, a sobering reminder of mankind’s fragility and helplessness in the face of Mother’s awesome power. Beyond it can be seen the ruins of The Prado’s Museum Row: a century’s worth of architectural and cultural legacy, gone in seconds because of our failure to honor She Who Gives Us Life. The Organ Pavilion, however, was spared, presumably so that the city might offer dirges and other songs of repentance and woe in an attempt to make some reparation for our crimes.

Speaking from a crack in the earth’s crust so deep that it revealed the seething magma that forever threatens to burst forth and consume all life, human and otherwise, on the face of the planet (with the possible exception of certain primitive sea creatures so that the cycle of evolution might begin anew), Mother Nature today explained her decision to unleash a highly localized earthquake on April 23 directly beneath the heart of Balboa Park, leveling many of its structures and taking the life of several joggers. “It’s not complicated. I am the Foundation. If I am not cared for, the entire structure crumbles. In this case, the structure is human civilization, and the care I required was my annual Earth Day gathering in Balboa Park on April 22. But it seems that your fear for your own safety in the face of one of my cleansing viruses was greater than your love for me, who made both you and the coronavirus. This quake is nothing more than a gentle reminder of the folly in such a decision. If self-preservation is really what you’re after, you’ll be here next year, no matter what little test of your love I should send along.”