O Truck, where art thou?

‘No GMO. Grass Fed. Gluten Free. Pesticide Free. Hormone Free. No Preservatives. Never Microwaved. No Artificial Flavors. No Hydrogenated Oils. America’s Healthiest Food Truck.”

This is the sign that grabs you when you stop by O, the organic food truck.

I’m in the back lot of 57 Degrees, the wine place on Hancock Street in Middletown. Tonight’s the monthly Third Friday food truck get-together. Sunset skies are collapsing into a rosy fuzz. The Amtrak train goes hurtling by just below the back fence. Now it’s quiet for a moment. You can feel the end-of-summer cool in the breeze.

They’ve got a smaller collection of trucks this month. But the one at the end draws me. It’s called the O Truck. Painted bright green, plus orange and sky-blue. Pics of black-and-white cows grazing in meadows on the side. You know “O” stands for “Organic.”

“Four at a time,” yells the guy through the order hole. “I’m on my own! I have to cook it, too!”

This is when a totally cool white BMW coupe swings up. I see it’s a Series 6. And a Dinan. Means it’s been re-engineered to zip along. I hear a Dinan tune-up costs tens of thousands. Rare car.

The driver hops out. “Okay, everybody. We’re back in business. Place your orders.”

I notice a slight accent. The guy looks tight and compact and wiry. Like he works out a lot.

A moment later he has hopped up into the truck, and the other guy retires to the kitchen end.

I join the line. America’s healthiest food truck? The menu choices on the side look kind of, well, greasy spoon, even if they are organic.

“O-Burgers: grass-fed beef, turkey or veggie burger, wrapped in lettuce or served on a bun, $9.”

Or: “Organic chili dog. Grass-fed beef, cheese from grass-fed cow, scallions & bun, $7.

Most dishes are in the $9–$15 range. Not cheap. But, the more I look, the more interesting it gets.

“Grand lobster mac ’n’ cheese,” the truck-side menu says. “Lobster, cheese from grass-fed cow, scallions, organic pasta (brown rice pasta optional), $12.”

Then they have a seared ahi tuna salad for $13. The tuna is blackened, seasoned, and seared and laid out over a Greek salad with goat cheese and things like walnuts and almonds mixed in.

Or a chicken ($10) or salmon ($13) plate with brown rice and Greek salad.

Or, herb-marinated lamb chops ($12 for one, $15 for two) with a Greek salad or brussels sprouts. Plus more what you’d expect from an organic truck: a vegan goulash of black and red pinto beans, peppers, onion, garlic, green beans, peas, carrots ($9). And they even have a California omelet with “free-range eggs, ham, grass-fed cheese, and red and yellow bell peppers.” Also nine bucks.

The chili dog at $7 is about what my Friday-night budget can handle, even though I long for those lamb chops, dang it. But then, just before my turn comes up, I spot another whiteboard menu labeled “Sides.”

It lists “gourmet potatoes” served with goat cheese, salsa, and balsamic vinegar ($6); chef’s brown rice, with goulash and a scrambled egg ($6); or brussels sprouts sautéed in chardonnay, olive oil, and house seasonings, $5.

So, when Jacek, the Polish owner with that cool Beemer, takes my order, I can’t resist asking for the sprouts as well as the dog. Fourteen bucks.

While I’m waiting I notice a certificate on the “sides” menu board:

“California Legislature Assembly. Certificate of Recognition presented to Jacek Konieczky, Organic Truck, in honor of: Hard work and dedication to serving delicious food and running a successful business.” It’s dated August 24, 2013.

The chef, Noah, hands down my two plates from the other hatch. First thing is this dog. It has a really nice sweet tang to it. The chili beans, too. Of course, trying to deal with it standing out here in the parking lot it’s a mess, but worth it to get to while it’s hot and fresh.

But it’s the sprouts. Dee-licious, partly blackened, and winey-tasting. Not your grandma’s sprouts. So, I’m just getting into them when Jacek pops down from the truck. He takes a wander among the huddles of customers eating his food in the shadowy lot.

“Did you know organic brussels sprouts are better than Viagra for keeping you, you know, active?” he says when I stop to talk. “But they don’t tell you these things. In the U.S., nobody wants you to be healthy. They want you to spend money on their pills and exercise machines. I’m a nutritionist. My rule is just eat real food. Not food that has been pasteurized, processed, pumped with hormones, poisoned with pesticides. I get my lamb from New Zealand, other meats and veggies from organic farms in the area like Julian. I don’t use anything that has been interfered with. That’s it. I come from Poland. My dad was a super strong guy. He used to pull out his own teeth when he had to. But he died at 44. He always ate bad food. I was 16. I knew I had to change.”

Jacek became a champion kick-boxer. Traveled the world. Had his own nutritionist. Learned nutrition, hormonal balance. Moved to the U.S. in 2002. Became a personal trainer. Charged $10,000 per customer for three intensive months. Still has 8000 followers on Twitter.

He says he and Noah work maybe 16 hours a day. “We have bookings going through to 2016 already. We are at Chargers games and vineyards like Orfila. They want us because we’re healthy.”

How healthy? “Well, just look at Noah. When I hired him he weighed 260 pounds. Now he’s down to 180. No special exercise. Just this organic food and hard work. His energy’s up, and he says his testosterone’s up, too. So something’s working.”

He looks at me, then my sprouts. “You need to eat these while they’re hot. Eat lots of them, because, seriously” — he gives a wink — “better than Viagra, and way cheaper.”

---

• The Place: O Food Truck, ofoodtruck.com, 858-401-3546, regularly at Third Friday Food Truck Extravaganza, Fifty Seven Degrees, 1735 Hancock Street, near Washington, 619-234-5757
• Prices: California omelet with “free-range eggs, ham, grass-fed cheese, and red and yellow bell peppers,” $9; O-Burgers: grass-fed, beef, turkey, or veggie, $9; organic chili dog, $7; grand lobster mac ’n’ cheese, $12; seared ahi tuna salad, $13; chicken or salmon plate ($10, $13) with brown rice and Greek salad; herb-marinated lamb chops, $12 for one, $15 for two, with Greek salad or brussels sprouts; vegan goulash; $9;
• Hours: Vary