Mayor Faulconer makes dramatic plea to save San Diego Opera

Just one day after San Diego Opera announced that it would be ceasing operations at the close of its season, a visibly shaken Mayor Faulconer called a special public session of the City Council to discuss possible ways to save the seemingly doomed institution.

"Between costumers, musicians, singers, set designers, makeup artists, hairstylists, publicists, theater technicians, acting coaches, and who knows what else, the San Diego Opera employs or supports some 1,000, um, 'creative types,'" said Faulconer. "Without the opera, where will these people go? I'll tell you where: San Francisco. Or New York. Or, God help us, Los Angeles. I do not want to be the mayor who presided over the great Hillcrest diaspora. We cannot consider ourselves a world-class city without a thriving, how do I put this, 'enclave for alternative lifestyles.' "

But while several members of the Council nodded gravely in agreement, no ideas for saving the opera were forthcoming. Finally, Faulconer himself bleated, "Look, I know what you're all thinking. We need to be putting every dime we can spare toward the new stadium for the Chargers. But I don't know — maybe we could find some way to incorporate the opera company into the new stadium deal or something. You know, add a stage at one end, let 'em put on a show once in a while. Between Junior Seau's suicide, Norv Turner's bizarre longevity, and the whole 'seduced by Los Angeles' scenario, there's got to be something you could build a tragedy around. And hey — what about all the freaks who come here in costumes for Comic-Con? You know they'd be able to do something funny with that. Didn't they make a hit musical out of Spider-Man on Broadway? Well, there you go."