Jake Esquire

Title: Jake Esquire Address: http://jakeesquire.typepad.com/jake_esquire/ Author: Jake Esquire From: La Jolla Blogging since: February 2007 Post Date: February 27, 2007 Post Title: no title

The mood is whimsical on Mira Mesa Boulevard this morning. The hard-working middle-class denizens of Mira Mesa are back up to their old driving antics. I am almost side-swiped by a merging van, as the driver has forgotten to check his blind spot prior to changing lanes. At the intersection of Black Mountain Road and Mira Mesa Boulevard, I observe at least three desperate community-college students running the red light racing to class. In my college days, I would have slowed down and waited for the light to turn red in order to avoid getting to class on time. My, how times have changed. Today's youth are to be commended for their educational dedication. I make it to work, my vehicle in one piece. As I slip and slide my way toward the first-floor elevator, the lower orders greet me. I am perhaps the only employee from the fifth floor they have ever conversed with. Today I receive more calls than usual. Joyce calls me to inform me that she has dyed her hair all black. Sexy model friend Candy calls to inform me that she has changed jobs...again. She's had more jobs than I've had one-night stands. Jenny calls me to let me know the results of last Saturday's speed-dating event at the Rock Bottom Brewery downtown. Jenny tells me that there were good-looking girls at the speed-dating event, and that most of the guys were either engineers or self-employed.

It then dawns on me that some people are really desperate. Or are they? I think that using the Internet to find dates is an excellent idea. Sure, they could be psycho, but so could anyone. I used to have a profile on adultfriendfinder.com. The account ran from January of 2005 to January of 2006, during which I ended up meeting five different women, as I recall. My profile was vague, something along the lines of "I just want to have a good time." The most entertaining part was browsing through all of the women's profiles. Some of them had hardcore pictures posted, and some of them censored out their faces. This game is tilted in the women's favor, as there are roughly 70 guys for each female profile, and the men tend to be more aggressively seeking ass than women.

Nevertheless, I met attractive women, so I can't complain about my adultfriendfinder.com experience. I did not contract an STD, and most of the ladies I met took me out to eat and drink and then straight back to bed. As I said, they were above-average looking, and I think a few of them were looking for real dates. (They were misinformed about the purpose of such a site.)

Recently, I've noticed that adultfriendfinder.com is filled with "working girls," some of whom can be seen on sandiego.craigslist.com advertising their erotic services. Gone are the days when it was practical to just go online looking for meaningless, anonymous sex with other attractive people. Plus, many of the women on adultfriendfinder.com and other such sites have a strange sense of entitlement. They realize that there are more men than women on the sites, and they use this to their advantage. As a result of there being more men, women are pickier, while the men tend to lower their standards. All of this doesn't really apply to me, because I am Jake, but you average blokes may find it hard to get a date on AFF or other dating sites due to the gender imbalance. Perhaps I will join AFF again someday.

I went to the gym last night and saw the usual suspects. Not as many attractive women as I would have hoped, but perhaps I went too late in the evening. The gym was full of UCSD students. (Have you ever noticed that UCSD kids always wear those silly UCSD sweaters, especially at the gym?) That institution turns out more brainless, unemployable robots than any school in San Diego. When we were hiring interns last year, I threw away most of the applications from UCSD students, as we run a serious business where large sums of money can be lost in the blink of an eye, and we really cannot afford to have second-rate business students bumbling around the office messing things up. Actually, that's a lie. I didn't throw them ALL away, as there were a few cute girls who applied for the position. Those applications sat on my desk for a week, while I tried to determine which applicant would look best making my morning coffee and running mindless errands for me. In the end, I couldn't decide, so I handed them off to the burly female HR manager, who proceeded to hire the least attractive of the bunch.

This week will be filled with stress, decisions, and long work hours. The big boss has jumped into another venture. He flew out to Hong Kong yesterday on his private jet to set up shop and incorporate. Word is that he may be sending me to work in that area after everything is established. This is fine by me, as I have nothing but fond memories of the girls in Hong Kong. Oh, Monday, you never disappoint.